07-03-2006, 12:17 PM | #31 | ||
~~Life is either a daring adventure or nothing.~~
Join Date: Apr 2006
Posts: 6,828
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I think it isn't as bad in real life as sharp as the internet presents it? I mean it's more quiet don't you think? I mean a group of people at work won't be talking like this outloud. Quote:
Yes, the odds say it is so. He has done it more than once. but to soften it. I got caught up in a user for a few years myself. Now I don't trust myself anymore . I know the idea of what you want...what could be is beautiful but if you arn't on the same page then he should go bye bye. |
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07-03-2006, 12:55 PM | #32 | |
Curious Sagittarius
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I am a good example of those who enjoy it but are not addicted. LOL
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07-03-2006, 03:27 PM | #33 |
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Porn is not cheating, the two have nothing to do with each other. In no way can that stretch be made.
Do what I used to do, send him a Thank You card... thanks for letting me know who you are and what you are now, before I spent any more of my valuable time on you. If if was very bad I sent a gift or flowers, usually at work. Was not a drunken one-night-mistake, premeditated cheat... he has done it before and was going to do it again. That is why he had the pictures on hand. I am very sorry this happened to you and am sending you loving and healing energy. |
07-04-2006, 09:24 AM | #34 | |
May Ter Dee
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07-04-2006, 10:02 AM | #35 |
polaroid of perfection
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Anon - I don't want to come across all hands-on-hips-Jerry-Springer-audience at you, but what are you still doing with this man?
He obviously does not want a monogamous relationship with you at present - either he was looking to replace you by advertising himself online, or he was looking for other women to sleep with as well as you. Neither of these options fits with a man who wants to commit solely to you. This does not necessarily make him a bad person, but it certainly makes him the wrong person for you. He could be the most wonderful man in the world, and you could love him more than any woman who's ever lived, but if you want different things from eachother you will end up getting hurt. More. Finish it. |
07-04-2006, 10:37 AM | #36 |
red-shirt guy
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Now, I obviously do not know either of you, and me offering advice to you on this subject is either hypocritical or ironic. Probably both. And making judgements based on your last post alone is foolhardy at best.
BUT. It sounds very much like you're not going to end this relationship. You're waiting for your anger to do it for you; some magical wave of willpower and indignation that's going to free you from the bonds of giving a rat's ass about this guy. It's not going to happen. No more emotional deposits? Every second you spend in this relationship will be a deposit; whether you tell him or not, every bit of sadness (and eventually, anger) you choke down is going to be an emotional deposit. Just not a healthy one. Don't fool yourself. If you're in love with him, there is no halfway point. Your emotions are not like water from a faucet that you can cut down to a trickle and control. Just leave. If you, God forbid, do stay with him, keep in mind that this is when you form the foundation of your relationship... and for that foundation to be halfway decent, certain things have to happen. 1. You have to confront him with what he's done 2. He needs to own up to what he's done, and sincerely express regret. No excuses. If he gets defensive, you've got a bad, rough road ahead of you. 3. He needs to be honest about why he did it, and 4. You have to able to at least start to forgive him for it. Now, mind you, I would ask you why in the hell you'd even want to go down this path. IMH-andhypocritical-O, it's the wrong one. But I know why. And I'm tellin' you now, if you stay, and those four steps don't get done...
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07-04-2006, 01:15 PM | #37 |
May Ter Dee
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1. You have to confront him with what he's done
2. He needs to own up to what he's done, and sincerely express regret. No excuses. If he gets defensive, you've got a bad, rough road ahead of you. 3. He needs to be honest about why he did it, and 4. You have to able to at least start to forgive him for it. These 4 things have happened. |
07-04-2006, 04:25 PM | #38 | |
Slattern of the Swail
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In Barrie's play and novel, the roles of fairies are brief: they are allies to the Lost Boys, the source of fairy dust and ...They are portrayed as dangerous, whimsical and extremely clever but quite hedonistic. "Shall I give you a kiss?" Peter asked and, jerking an acorn button off his coat, solemnly presented it to her. —James Barrie Wimminfolk they be tricksy. - ZenGum |
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07-04-2006, 05:11 PM | #39 | |
Curious Sagittarius
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(((((((((((anonymousfornow))))))))))))))) That is a great decision, and I bet you might fluxuate on it, some back and forth....that's normal. Maintaining your dignity is important. What is he saying about things? Did he agree that you were exclusive? Where does he want your relationship to go? I wish you both the very best.
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07-06-2006, 12:29 AM | #40 | |
May Ter Dee
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07-06-2006, 03:12 PM | #41 |
When Do I Get Virtual Unreality?
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So do you have his yarbles hanging from your mirror, then?
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07-06-2006, 04:23 PM | #42 | |
Encroaching on your decrees
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07-06-2006, 05:47 PM | #43 | |
May Ter Dee
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07-06-2006, 05:55 PM | #44 |
Slattern of the Swail
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Oh, honey.
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In Barrie's play and novel, the roles of fairies are brief: they are allies to the Lost Boys, the source of fairy dust and ...They are portrayed as dangerous, whimsical and extremely clever but quite hedonistic. "Shall I give you a kiss?" Peter asked and, jerking an acorn button off his coat, solemnly presented it to her. —James Barrie Wimminfolk they be tricksy. - ZenGum |
07-06-2006, 10:12 PM | #45 |
The future is unwritten
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Why not just put your decision on hold until it's convenient. Don't commit to anything until you're ready.
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