The Cellar  

Go Back   The Cellar > Main > Home Base
FAQ Community Calendar Today's Posts Search

Home Base A starting point, and place for threads don't seem to belong anywhere else

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 09-01-2005, 12:38 PM   #511
Elspode
When Do I Get Virtual Unreality?
 
Join Date: Dec 2002
Location: Raytown, Missouri
Posts: 12,719
When the guy sticks his head in the barbershop and asks how long until he can get a haircut, he's actually finding out how long it will be before the guy who is in the chair is done. The inquisitive guy then runs back to the house of the guy in the chair, presumably to do his wife.
__________________
"To those of you who are wearing ties, I think my dad would appreciate it if you took them off." - Robert Moog
Elspode is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-01-2005, 01:12 PM   #512
wolf
lobber of scimitars
 
Join Date: Jul 2001
Location: Phila Burbs
Posts: 20,774
Not the guy in the chair's wife, the barber's.
__________________
wolf eht htiw og

"Conspiracies are the norm, not the exception." --G. Edward Griffin The Creature from Jekyll Island

High Priestess of the Church of the Whale Penis
wolf is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-01-2005, 01:16 PM   #513
Elspode
When Do I Get Virtual Unreality?
 
Join Date: Dec 2002
Location: Raytown, Missouri
Posts: 12,719
Well, hell...looks like *I* didn't get it, either.
__________________
"To those of you who are wearing ties, I think my dad would appreciate it if you took them off." - Robert Moog
Elspode is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-01-2005, 01:17 PM   #514
wolf
lobber of scimitars
 
Join Date: Jul 2001
Location: Phila Burbs
Posts: 20,774
Guy in the chair will be there for <15 minutes ... this joke might also work for "guy at the end of the line," but since he would be the most likely candidate to be sent to go follow the dude, and the joke wouldn't be as funny if it ended in a double murder and suicide, it's got to be the barber's wife that's getting it on with the questioner.

Oh, and the Coyote thing? Loved it. Especially being one who walks with coyote.
__________________
wolf eht htiw og

"Conspiracies are the norm, not the exception." --G. Edward Griffin The Creature from Jekyll Island

High Priestess of the Church of the Whale Penis
wolf is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-01-2005, 01:23 PM   #515
zippyt
LONG LIVE KING ZIPPY! per Feetz
 
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: Arkansas
Posts: 7,661
I didn't think it was THAT complicated !!!!
__________________
"Success is getting what you want. Happiness is wanting what you get. "
Brother Dave Gardner
zippyt is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-01-2005, 01:29 PM   #516
wolf
lobber of scimitars
 
Join Date: Jul 2001
Location: Phila Burbs
Posts: 20,774
It wasn't, which I why I'm so amused by the number of people who <strike>think</strike> thought they were very smart who didn't get it.
__________________
wolf eht htiw og

"Conspiracies are the norm, not the exception." --G. Edward Griffin The Creature from Jekyll Island

High Priestess of the Church of the Whale Penis
wolf is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-01-2005, 04:49 PM   #517
BrianR
Cleverly disguised as a responsible adult
 
Join Date: Jan 2001
Location: Dallas, TX
Posts: 3,338
I got it right away. What does that make me? No, wait! Don't answer that!
__________________
Never be afraid to tell the world who you are. -- Anonymous
BrianR is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-01-2005, 05:34 PM   #518
Cyclefrance
Pump my ride!
 
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: Deep countryside of Surrey , England
Posts: 1,890
Hang on, now! It could be Bill who's going to the barber's house. You know what they say about trusting a friend. Great opportunity to lay the blame on some guy that nobody knows, who genuinely wants a haircut but only has a few minutes to spare each time. Yeah, the more I think about it the more I'm convincing myself that it is Bill who is going to the barber's house. Neat!
__________________
Always sufficient hills - never sufficient gears
Cyclefrance is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-01-2005, 07:21 PM   #519
Kagen4o4
The Sheriff of Nothingland
 
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Melbourne, Aus
Posts: 1,794
i thought it was all about a government conspiracy to do with aliens being experimented on in the barbers house without his knowledge. i thought it was funny.

but seriously i got it straight away
Kagen4o4 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-07-2005, 09:21 AM   #520
LabRat
twatfaced two legged bumhole
 
Join Date: Jun 2004
Posts: 3,143
I posted this in the parenting thread, but also here for those who don't frequent it. Made me laugh out loud.

A mother was working in the kitchen listening to her
>>>>>5-year-old son playing with his new electric train in the living
>>>>>room.
>>>>>
>>>>>She heard the train stop and her son saying,
>>>>>"All of you sons of bitches who want off, get the hell off now ..
>>>>>cause this is the last stop! And all of you sons of bitches who are
>>>>>getting on, get your asses in the train ... cause we're going down
>>>>>the tracks."
>>>>>
>>>>>The horrified mother went in and told her son,
>>>>>"We don't use that kind of language in this house.
>>>>>Now I want you to go to your room and you are to stay there for TWO
>>>>>HOURS. When you come out, you may play with your train ... but I
>>>>>want you to use nice language."
>>>>>
>>>>>Two hours later, the son came out of the bedroom and resumed
>>>>>playing with his train.
>>>>>
>>>>>Soon the train stopped and the mother heard her son say ... "All
>>>>>passengers, please remember your things, thank you, and hope your
>>>>>trip was a pleasant one. We hope you will ride with us again soon.
>>>>>"She heard her little darling continue .."For those of you just
>>>>>boarding, remember, there is no smoking in the train. We hope you
>>>>>will have a pleasant and relaxing journey with us today."
>>>>>
>>>>>As the mother began to smile, the child added,
>>>>>"For those of you who are pissed off about the TWO HOUR delay,
>>>>>please see the bitch in the kitchen .."
__________________
Strength does not come from how much weight you can lift, or how many miles you can run. It comes from knowing that you set a goal, and rose to the challenge. Strength comes from within.
LabRat is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-07-2005, 09:26 AM   #521
LabRat
twatfaced two legged bumhole
 
Join Date: Jun 2004
Posts: 3,143
Oh, and thanks for the head's up about the barber joke, cute now that I get it. Was that 'people who think they're so smart' comment directed at me?? Or am I being paranoid? I fully admit I have no clue about a whole heck of a lot of stuff, which is why I hang out here. (to learn, not be with other dummies)
__________________
Strength does not come from how much weight you can lift, or how many miles you can run. It comes from knowing that you set a goal, and rose to the challenge. Strength comes from within.
LabRat is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-09-2005, 09:13 AM   #522
plthijinx
Master Dwellar
 
Join Date: Aug 2003
Posts: 4,197
Bush on Vacation

Attached Images
 
__________________
For your dreams to come true, you must first have a dream.
plthijinx is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-09-2005, 11:48 AM   #523
BigV
Goon Squad Leader
 
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: Seattle
Posts: 27,063
you are so..... bad. :snort!:
__________________
Be Just and Fear Not.
BigV is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-09-2005, 12:10 PM   #524
bargalunan
Abecedarian
 
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: Nantes (France)
Posts: 175
So realistic

Hoping the fish is polluted
bargalunan is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-09-2005, 12:35 PM   #525
bargalunan
Abecedarian
 
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: Nantes (France)
Posts: 175
Donkey
Attached Images
 
bargalunan is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Tags
humor


Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 2 (0 members and 2 guests)
 

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump

All times are GMT -5. The time now is 06:51 AM.


Powered by: vBulletin Version 3.8.1
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.