gurk - Page 2

Trilby · 05-23-2005, 10:40 AM

*sob* I'm 41 and i'm STILL waiting. You whippersnappers got it easy.

cowhead · 05-24-2005, 02:30 AM

okay.. here's the thing.. I am a hopless romantic.. brianna and catwoman there is i believe (in all what's left of my heart and soul) that there in a 'one' I know.. foolish my brain rejects the concept fully.. but you know.. damnit! I have to believe in somehting, and since the whole god thing isn't going to do it for me I have to put my faith somewhere.. I mean.. atleast to me it seems like there is a part of each person that yearns for somehting larger and better than the self (atleast I hope everyone has something like that going on..) and for me that's it.. I think I have found the 'one', although..I dunno I can only be myself and see what happens with her.. (alhtough being also a right bastard I did go home with a 22 year old girl the other night..if I can't have what I want I will take what I can) I want this Sarah girl to love me/like me.. and she does both.. a.)she won't admit it to herself (no really you don't mistake that look in someones eyes.. when you can see you? know what I mean? b.) the last relationships either of us had ended badly.. very badly.. so it makes a body a little gunshy as it were. she has a kid with a guy who (okay I'm going to go on a tangent here in a sec.) who has never met his daughter.. and she's 6 almost 7.. okay.. tangent real quick.. sorry...one fucking thing I don't understand.. if you got someone pregnant and they went ahead with the birthing ( a womans choice as far as I am concerned) HOW IN THE HELL! can you wait six fucking year to meet your child.. YOUR CHILD!!! it just seems the height of assishness.. okay! shit she's not even asking for child support (god knows it wouldn't hurt!) but sweet crap! then again.. maybe it's just me and my suit of rusty armour.. waiting for that damn damsel in distress. (again)

cowhead · 05-24-2005, 03:47 AM

hey sun_sparkz.. some one my age and 'maturity' level is exactely what I want.. the trick I suppose id finding that.. *sigh*

Catwoman · 05-24-2005, 04:16 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cowhead

I want this Sarah girl to love me/like me.. and she does both.. a.)she won't admit it to herself (no really you don't mistake that look in someones eyes.. when you can see you? know what I mean? b.) the last relationships either of us had ended badly.. very badly..

What if you can mistake 'that look'. And how much of what one sees 'in their eyes' is actually in the eyes, and not just an optimistic interpretation of facial expressions combined with some effective confirmation bias?

I want to believe you cowhead, but I don't. All our situations are so similar I can't help but realise we can't ALL be right - we all think our relationship is special, and the other person will 'come round in the end' but maybe they won't, maybe we're just giving ourselves excuses to prevent us from seeing the truth that might allow us to break free from our conditioning. And conditioning is very comfortable.

cowhead · 05-25-2005, 02:46 AM

catwoman.. damn I like the way you think. on some things.. yeah I do believe it is just in my head as of late, she hasn't written/called me in days, so.. although I do want to believe in 'that sort of thing' I am now calling myself a fool, although I have to say.. after years of this shit I am still proud to be a fool for love.. I've been beaten down and kicked round (emotionally..) the thing is I was so astounded that I couild even feel this.. that the whole thing has been worth it.. just for that moment. I felt something that I never thought I would feel again. so for that it was worth it.. then again I've been writting love songs for a woman who doesn't exist on a past that doesn't exist for years.. it helps the guitar/ songwriting process if the person doesn't actually exist to get pissed off at you for writing about it.. then again.. I suppose it's kida wrong? the funny thing is that the girl you are seeing (and no, I'm not a cheap whore anymore) asks you about the material.. and you say you made the whole thing up.. man the look in the eye.. somewhere between oh damn! sorry to hear it.. and you're f*cking crazy... anyway.. I have/had a dream.. really.. a simple dream of things to come and this is where I am going to get off on an odd ass tanget...I have dreamed of some things that have come to happen, and there is something coming up, I hgave had too many de ja' vues of late.. things I drempt earlier in life.. I remember them.. (long story as to why I do).. so.. anyway sometime soon I think 'the one' will come along.. yeah I know it's a foolish concept.. but I can't/won't giv eit up.. to do so would be to surrender too much of my 'soul' or my limited belief system..,. oh wow I guess I've had too much to drink.. disregard the above

)

cowhead · 05-25-2005, 02:53 AM

oh and I rarely mistake 'that look' I watch people, and I study those that I like.. not in a bad way... just to anticipate what they want. and this woman is my carbon copy...we're deaf in opposite ears.. we are different handed.I'll post our star charts which are amazingly the same (and they are both very very fucked up by those in the know)..anyway.. did I mention drinking too much? I need to sleep.. g'night all

cowhead · 05-25-2005, 03:23 AM

I've been waiting 20 years.. I can wait a bit more.. the thing is that pisses me off is that there are so many SO MANY! men of my age that have 2-3 kids and have been married a couple of times.... I'm sorry to me? it means until you are parted by death... make it work! it can be done! I promise! (damn optimism!).. I could go on and on about ideals but, as above sleep really ought to happen...good night all and once again thank you.

cowhead · 05-25-2005, 03:36 AM

oh remind me of my love lost moving across the country story! I had a revalation one day whilst on my way to work... ruined my song writing.. lyrically anyway.. well the gist of it is... (sorry I keep posting on this thread..Im not that pathetic really! really?) as I was driving to work the Nixons songs 'sister' came on the radio, and as it played I realized that we all have had our hearts broken.. badly, no.. god didn't have anything to do with it, the fates. nothing to do with it.. it wasn't personal... it happens.. to everyone..no one is special, no one is unique (well we all are but in this respect we are not), and that this pain is inflicted on all of us. so what's the point in making a fuss over it? that's when I gave up writing lyrics.. and moved soley onto music... well okay with the last two bands I'll write the chorus, and let the singer do the rest of the build up to that.. the last one I wrote goes something like this (although it's better with the music)

there aren't enough stars in the sky
to make this wish come true
so soak your dreams in gasoline
strike a match
it's just that easy

well.. if you heard the music it makes more sense.. structually speaking.. anyway! I need to curl up and die.. I mean sleep! now...

BigV · 05-25-2005, 10:46 AM

Listen everybody, if you want to smoke, light up outside, ok? All those lighters are keeping poor cowhead from getting his rest. No more encores, seriously. He's played 'em all. Now go home.

cowhead · 05-25-2005, 09:01 PM

yeah sorry about that... I get too far ahead in my head.. sometimes I need a solid slap in the face just to keep my focus.

plthijinx · 05-25-2005, 10:55 PM

dude you are as passionate about finding true love as i am on getting a job with the airlines. i understand what your going through though, i was married and fully believed in the death do you part and make it work thing. she had different plans. i just recently started dating someone that i knew from before i was married (she used to wait on future ex and i at our local watering hole) and anyway we hooked up and have been on again and off again for a few months now. on and off i guess because were both coming out of mentally challenging relationships. hold strong brother, good is just around the bend.

and where the hell are my group of 19-20 year olds? damn. i gotta quit hangin' out at the airport.

cowhead · 05-27-2005, 01:54 AM

that's what I keep telling myself. then again I have known the love that you feel in every cell of your body.. not saying I want that again, when it failed oh boy... I still have scars

) anyway! I hope things work out for you, as for now I've given up.. or atleast biding my time.. like I said I've waited 20 years. a little more won't kill me. although I have to say it's done wonders for my song writting.. no no lyrics

so that's an upside.. oh hey! plthijinx do you know a woman by the name of Lex Romester? she lives kinda nead you (well in bebrook.. but spends time in most of the major cities) wonderfull person and a damn good writer. (we spent a year and some talking to eachother online and then she I dunno disapeared). yeah I know Texas is a big state and all, but hell! if I can talk to case in bumblefuck Kansas.. there's a chance

05-23-2005, 10:40 AM	#16
Trilby Slattern of the Swail Join Date: Jul 2004 Posts: 15,654	sob I'm 41 and i'm STILL waiting. You whippersnappers got it easy. __________________ In Barrie's play and novel, the roles of fairies are brief: they are allies to the Lost Boys, the source of fairy dust and ...They are portrayed as dangerous, whimsical and extremely clever but quite hedonistic. "Shall I give you a kiss?" Peter asked and, jerking an acorn button off his coat, solemnly presented it to her. —James Barrie Wimminfolk they be tricksy. - ZenGum

05-24-2005, 02:30 AM	#17
cowhead halve your cake and eat it too. Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: Georgia.. by way of Lawrence Kansas Posts: 1,359	okay.. here's the thing.. I am a hopless romantic.. brianna and catwoman there is i believe (in all what's left of my heart and soul) that there in a 'one' I know.. foolish my brain rejects the concept fully.. but you know.. damnit! I have to believe in somehting, and since the whole god thing isn't going to do it for me I have to put my faith somewhere.. I mean.. atleast to me it seems like there is a part of each person that yearns for somehting larger and better than the self (atleast I hope everyone has something like that going on..) and for me that's it.. I think I have found the 'one', although..I dunno I can only be myself and see what happens with her.. (alhtough being also a right bastard I did go home with a 22 year old girl the other night..if I can't have what I want I will take what I can) I want this Sarah girl to love me/like me.. and she does both.. a.)she won't admit it to herself (no really you don't mistake that look in someones eyes.. when you can see you? know what I mean? b.) the last relationships either of us had ended badly.. very badly.. so it makes a body a little gunshy as it were. she has a kid with a guy who (okay I'm going to go on a tangent here in a sec.) who has never met his daughter.. and she's 6 almost 7.. okay.. tangent real quick.. sorry...one fucking thing I don't understand.. if you got someone pregnant and they went ahead with the birthing ( a womans choice as far as I am concerned) HOW IN THE HELL! can you wait six fucking year to meet your child.. YOUR CHILD!!! it just seems the height of assishness.. okay! shit she's not even asking for child support (god knows it wouldn't hurt!) but sweet crap! then again.. maybe it's just me and my suit of rusty armour.. waiting for that damn damsel in distress. (again) __________________ no my child.. this is not my desire..I'm digging for fire.

05-24-2005, 03:47 AM	#18
cowhead halve your cake and eat it too. Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: Georgia.. by way of Lawrence Kansas Posts: 1,359	hey sun_sparkz.. some one my age and 'maturity' level is exactely what I want.. the trick I suppose id finding that.. sigh __________________ no my child.. this is not my desire..I'm digging for fire.

05-25-2005, 02:46 AM	#20
cowhead halve your cake and eat it too. Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: Georgia.. by way of Lawrence Kansas Posts: 1,359	catwoman.. damn I like the way you think. on some things.. yeah I do believe it is just in my head as of late, she hasn't written/called me in days, so.. although I do want to believe in 'that sort of thing' I am now calling myself a fool, although I have to say.. after years of this shit I am still proud to be a fool for love.. I've been beaten down and kicked round (emotionally..) the thing is I was so astounded that I couild even feel this.. that the whole thing has been worth it.. just for that moment. I felt something that I never thought I would feel again. so for that it was worth it.. then again I've been writting love songs for a woman who doesn't exist on a past that doesn't exist for years.. it helps the guitar/ songwriting process if the person doesn't actually exist to get pissed off at you for writing about it.. then again.. I suppose it's kida wrong? the funny thing is that the girl you are seeing (and no, I'm not a cheap whore anymore) asks you about the material.. and you say you made the whole thing up.. man the look in the eye.. somewhere between oh damn! sorry to hear it.. and you're f*cking crazy... anyway.. I have/had a dream.. really.. a simple dream of things to come and this is where I am going to get off on an odd ass tanget...I have dreamed of some things that have come to happen, and there is something coming up, I hgave had too many de ja' vues of late.. things I drempt earlier in life.. I remember them.. (long story as to why I do).. so.. anyway sometime soon I think 'the one' will come along.. yeah I know it's a foolish concept.. but I can't/won't giv eit up.. to do so would be to surrender too much of my 'soul' or my limited belief system..,. oh wow I guess I've had too much to drink.. disregard the above ) __________________ no my child.. this is not my desire..I'm digging for fire.

05-25-2005, 02:53 AM	#21
cowhead halve your cake and eat it too. Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: Georgia.. by way of Lawrence Kansas Posts: 1,359	oh and I rarely mistake 'that look' I watch people, and I study those that I like.. not in a bad way... just to anticipate what they want. and this woman is my carbon copy...we're deaf in opposite ears.. we are different handed.I'll post our star charts which are amazingly the same (and they are both very very fucked up by those in the know)..anyway.. did I mention drinking too much? I need to sleep.. g'night all __________________ no my child.. this is not my desire..I'm digging for fire. Last edited by cowhead; 05-25-2005 at 03:21 AM. Reason: minor fuck ups.. then again I ought to sleep

05-25-2005, 03:23 AM	#22
cowhead halve your cake and eat it too. Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: Georgia.. by way of Lawrence Kansas Posts: 1,359	I've been waiting 20 years.. I can wait a bit more.. the thing is that pisses me off is that there are so many SO MANY! men of my age that have 2-3 kids and have been married a couple of times.... I'm sorry to me? it means until you are parted by death... make it work! it can be done! I promise! (damn optimism!).. I could go on and on about ideals but, as above sleep really ought to happen...good night all and once again thank you. __________________ no my child.. this is not my desire..I'm digging for fire.

05-25-2005, 03:36 AM	#23
cowhead halve your cake and eat it too. Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: Georgia.. by way of Lawrence Kansas Posts: 1,359	oh remind me of my love lost moving across the country story! I had a revalation one day whilst on my way to work... ruined my song writing.. lyrically anyway.. well the gist of it is... (sorry I keep posting on this thread..Im not that pathetic really! really?) as I was driving to work the Nixons songs 'sister' came on the radio, and as it played I realized that we all have had our hearts broken.. badly, no.. god didn't have anything to do with it, the fates. nothing to do with it.. it wasn't personal... it happens.. to everyone..no one is special, no one is unique (well we all are but in this respect we are not), and that this pain is inflicted on all of us. so what's the point in making a fuss over it? that's when I gave up writing lyrics.. and moved soley onto music... well okay with the last two bands I'll write the chorus, and let the singer do the rest of the build up to that.. the last one I wrote goes something like this (although it's better with the music) there aren't enough stars in the sky to make this wish come true so soak your dreams in gasoline strike a match it's just that easy well.. if you heard the music it makes more sense.. structually speaking.. anyway! I need to curl up and die.. I mean sleep! now... __________________ no my child.. this is not my desire..I'm digging for fire.

05-25-2005, 10:46 AM	#24
BigV Goon Squad Leader Join Date: Nov 2004 Location: Seattle Posts: 27,063	Listen everybody, if you want to smoke, light up outside, ok? All those lighters are keeping poor cowhead from getting his rest. No more encores, seriously. He's played 'em all. Now go home. __________________ Be Just and Fear Not.

05-25-2005, 09:01 PM	#25
cowhead halve your cake and eat it too. Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: Georgia.. by way of Lawrence Kansas Posts: 1,359	yeah sorry about that... I get too far ahead in my head.. sometimes I need a solid slap in the face just to keep my focus. __________________ no my child.. this is not my desire..I'm digging for fire.

05-25-2005, 10:55 PM	#26
plthijinx Master Dwellar Join Date: Aug 2003 Posts: 4,197	dude you are as passionate about finding true love as i am on getting a job with the airlines. i understand what your going through though, i was married and fully believed in the death do you part and make it work thing. she had different plans. i just recently started dating someone that i knew from before i was married (she used to wait on future ex and i at our local watering hole) and anyway we hooked up and have been on again and off again for a few months now. on and off i guess because were both coming out of mentally challenging relationships. hold strong brother, good is just around the bend. and where the hell are my group of 19-20 year olds? damn. i gotta quit hangin' out at the airport. __________________ For your dreams to come true, you must first have a dream.

05-27-2005, 01:54 AM	#27
cowhead halve your cake and eat it too. Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: Georgia.. by way of Lawrence Kansas Posts: 1,359	that's what I keep telling myself. then again I have known the love that you feel in every cell of your body.. not saying I want that again, when it failed oh boy... I still have scars ) anyway! I hope things work out for you, as for now I've given up.. or atleast biding my time.. like I said I've waited 20 years. a little more won't kill me. although I have to say it's done wonders for my song writting.. no no lyrics so that's an upside.. oh hey! plthijinx do you know a woman by the name of Lex Romester? she lives kinda nead you (well in bebrook.. but spends time in most of the major cities) wonderfull person and a damn good writer. (we spent a year and some talking to eachother online and then she I dunno disapeared). yeah I know Texas is a big state and all, but hell! if I can talk to case in bumblefuck Kansas.. there's a chance __________________ no my child.. this is not my desire..I'm digging for fire.

Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)