Ramadan

[BigV]

I changed my mind about hijacking this thread. It deserves it's own thread.

I have been following the conversation in the Fatter than God thread, and I don't have much more to add than my initial two cents worth (should that be possesive?). Anyway. During the month of Ramadan, I have been fasting, along with a friend who is a Muslim. And when the subject came up at home, DaughterofV showed interest and volunteered to fast as well. We are not Muslim, and the religious dogma that accompanies the fasting is not our principle reason for fasting. I'll describe my motivations and observations, which are largely shared by DaughterofV.

I am not strictly following the schedule. I have a copy of it, and I have instead chosen to fast during the daylight hours, and I simplify that definition by choosing 7:00 am as sunrise and 7:00 pm as sunset. The actual figures are pretty close to that, and although I gain about 3-4 minutes of eating time every day according to the almanac, I have chosen to just stick to the 7 to 7 routine.

I have succeeded completely in my fast to this point, I am pleased to say. Just as my timeframe is simple and therefore easy to follow, the rules of the fast are also simple. No food, no drink, no sex, no swearing from sunrise to sunset. This has been a very informative experience for me.

I have noticed many interesting things. First off, when 7pm rolls around, I'm ready to eat. But curiously, I'm not really "hungry". I have found that I am rarely hungry, outside of Ramadan. When I eat, almost always, it is because of habit, not because of hunger. This surprise is the one that occurred to me while reading the other thread. I have developed habits of eating that are largely disconnected from my body's needs (hunger). I have developed habits that ignore or distort my interpretation of my body's signals of hunger and satiation. I have long misread a specific time of day as "hunger" and I have long thought wrongly about "I have room for more" or "I don't want to throw that out" or "I took it, I'll eat it" and disregarded my feelings of saiety. This point, above all others, has been the most instructive insight into my own habits. The very habits that lead to the situation I'm in. And I want to be in a different situation--thinner, lower blood pressure--I must have different habits. That cannot happen without an understanding of my existing habits. This fast has thrown my current habits into sharp relief.

The next thing I observed, closely related to the first point, is the power of my mind in this situation. I am currently choosing to fast. I feel the tug of the old habits, and when they conflict with my current choices, like a cup of coffee in the morning, or having lunch, I have had the pleasant experience of being able to resist that tug. Intentionally resisting, intentionally choosing, consciously, wakefully choosing. You all may not find this as astonishing as I have. You may live very intentionally. You may have alert and aware eating habits. I have found that I have not been so alert and aware. I want to remember this newly recovered power of will. I want to remember it after Ramadan when I remove the artificial restraint on my eating schedule. I want to remember that I can successfully choose to pass up a tasty treat, that I can get by without seconds, or that the tail end of my meal can go in the trash or the fridge. I want to remember that I will not be deprived or scarred. I want to remember the longer term health benefits I reap, instead of the short term gain (pun noticed, not inappropriate). I hope I can remember, and act accordingly.

I have also found that I'm eating less. No big surprise there, but there is a big surprise for me in seeing how little food it takes for me to be really full now for my evening meal. I'm a big guy, and I have always been a big eater. What I am now having as a full meal would previously been just half a meal or so, depending. My portion sizes, no, what satisfies me, what gives me that pleasant full feeling is sooo much less food now. I found that surprising. Last night, for example, I had a mug of bean soup, a grilled cheese sandwich, a small glass of juice, a large glass of water, a dessert cup of lemon pudding, and two two-inch rice krispy balls. I was packed. I couldn't finish the pudding. I didn't scrape the bottom of the mug for the last quarter teaspoon of soup. Another lesson learned.

I have compared my zero snacking now to my previous grazing behavior. Practically none of the snacks I ate before, a little candy at the reception desk, a granola bar, bagel in the lunchroom, birthday cake every couple of weeks at the office, sometimes I'd eat my lunch for breakfast at my desk. ALL those bites contributed to my calorie intake, but mostly didn't satisfy or soothe me in any lasting way. Maybe it scratched some itch but it wasn't hunger.

I've read that a habit is a cable we weave one thread a day time. Actually, I tried checking my memory on this and found three nice quotes.

Habit is a cable; we weave a thread of it each day, and at last we cannot break it.
Mann, Horace -- 1796-1859 American Educator

The beginning of a habit is like an invisible thread, but every time we repeat the act we strengthen the strand, add to it another filament, until it becomes a great cable and binds us irrevocably thought and act.
Marden, Orison Swett -- 1850-1924 American Author Founder of Success Magazine

Habits are cobwebs at first; cables at last.
Proverb, Chinese -- Sayings of Chinese Origin

I like this last one. True, isn't it? I intend to set aside my old habits and adopt new ones. Ones I mean to adopt and keep, not just ones I've blundered into. I've got a week's worth of threads for this new cable.

You could conclude that I've only been thinking about my diet this week. That would not be true, however. I have used this artificial minor deprivation to reflect as well. I've been thinking about those people around the world and in my community for whom a single meal a day is not a choice, but a fact. And for those for whom is it not a fact, but a hope. I look at the pictures of people fighting over blankets in Pakistan, and contrast those images with ones of people in New Orleans wondering where, oh where, is their trailer from FEMA. I understand we have a very different standard of living here compared to Pakistan. And I'm not bagging on the people who've been wiped out by the hurricane. But I am aware of my relative wealth. Sure, there's a lot of ground above me on the ladder of materialism, ground I strive every day to cover. But there are far, far more people who don't have what I have. And I do myself a disservice when I don't count my own blessings. And when I don't share my blessings. It doesn't take much, and what I give away doesn't harm me or my family and is appreciated by those who receive it. I am happy to be able to be in a position to give. That is the blessing.

I have lost weight. I expect and hope there will be a similar favorable effect on my blood pressure as well. I'll give some specific numbers when I weigh myself tomorrow. To get the bp numbers I'll have to find my sphygmomanometer. (Yes, I had to look up the spelling.)

I have learned that I am not a captive prisoner of my habits, my genes, my environment, my parents, my fate. I can choose my path to a large degree. That is an enormously liberating epiphany. And I get to share the experience with dear DaughterofV. She's learning right alongside me. She's got the power to do the same for her life as I have with mine. And, delightfully, she's learning it 30 years earlier that I am. To be fair, I've known these things for a long time, but I have lost track of them. My belief faded and atrophied from disuse. I feel renewed.