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Old 04-19-2013, 10:49 AM   #31
glatt
 
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that sucks. I'm sorry.
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Old 04-19-2013, 10:57 AM   #32
infinite monkey
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Yeah, me too. Sweetest lady you'd ever want to know.
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Old 04-19-2013, 08:55 PM   #33
orthodoc
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Sorry to hear that, infi. Fuck cancer, in spades and in every other suit and manner possible.
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Old 04-21-2013, 01:56 PM   #34
CaliforniaMama
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Quote:
Originally Posted by infinite monkey View Post
Yeah, me too. Sweetest lady you'd ever want to know.
One day I went to see my doctor because of a raging headache that would not let up. I'd had it a few days.

She noticed a bit of a rash at my hairline and asked me about it. I hadn't noticed it. Turns out I had shingles. I wasn't even 50 and already had multiple health issues.

She teared up and said, "Why does it always happen to my nicest patients?"

Esophageal cancer scares me to death. I am at risk for multiple reasons and my cousin died that way. It was awful. He was in horrible pain for a long time before he went.

Too many cancers are a wild card. You don't know until it is too late.

My dad had small cell lung cancer - a very aggressive kind. They thought he had heart problems, so while he was getting angio-ed for nothing his cancer was growing. By the time they realized, it was too late. I think his was one year from diagnosis to death. Two and 1/2 years after my mom died of metastatic breast cancer.

Sorry, don't mean to steal the stage - just letting you know I've been there.

You have my sympathy.
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Old 04-22-2013, 09:15 AM   #35
infinite monkey
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Thanks CaliMa. You're not stealing any stage...it helps us all to hear of others' experiences.

My friend who died from EC was a drummer in my ex's band. I'd known his wife since we were kids, then we all become buddies again years later. EC had also taken my friend's father.

He didn't smoke or anything: he just got it, and then he passed away from it.

It was terribly sad.
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Old 04-22-2013, 09:47 AM   #36
footfootfoot
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Out of the blue, maybe a year ago, a crazy ex GF to whom I hadn't spoken in almost 18 years emails me out of the blue, full of apologies, and fawning praise about what a great guy I am, how I am awesome to the 10th power, how I changed her life, and taught her so many things and so on etc.

I was polite and somewhat reserved, kept everything on a superficial level and didn't keep the ball rolling.

Over the next several months I would get semi-regular emails from her saying the same thing in different ways, and my responses were always neutral.

When I met her she had just had her 5 year anniversary of being cancer free (Lymphoma--I don't remember if it was Hodgkins or Non-Hodgkins) So eventually she gets around to telling me that she contacted me because it was her 20th Anniversary of being cancer-free and she had been thinking of me and how great I was etc etc (As I'm typing this I see the math doesn't work out, This should really be her 23rd year-- I suspect she might have made up the number 20 because it sounded better than 23)

A few weeks ago she mentioned that she was having health issues and didn't want to elaborate. Yesterday I get an email from her saying she has cancer and it is in an advanced stage, and she can't handle this without my help.

a. Fuck cancer.
b. Even though you are as mad as a shithouse rat, still, fuck cancer.
c. I'm sorry, but we dated for less than a year, 18 years ago, you'll need to find another support team.
d. Fuck craziness in the head.

I feel bad for anyone going through this shit, and this woman has had more than her share of shitty in this life even without the cancer, but I am having an awfully hard time scraping together much enthusiasm for her case.

It's the manipulative guilt trip thing and the bird with a broken wing thing that irks me. I think she remembers me when I was a knee-jerk caretaking fixer of other's problems rather than the sympathetic ear, that's tough breaks, kid, but I've got to deal with the mess I've made of my life right now, kind of guy I'm becoming.

Anyway, this maybe belongs in another thread, but it is sort of about cancer.
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Old 04-22-2013, 09:54 AM   #37
glatt
 
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I was always the guy who would do anything for people, but after a while, I realized I was being taken somewhat advantage of. You learn to balance these things as you get older.

Sorry your crazy ex GF has cancer. You need to take care of yourself and children first. She's way down on the list of priorities.
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Old 04-22-2013, 10:26 AM   #38
infinite monkey
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It's all very Mike Yanagita, foot.
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Old 04-22-2013, 02:02 PM   #39
xoxoxoBruce
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Quote:
Originally Posted by glatt View Post
I was always the guy who would do anything for people, but after a while, I realized I was being taken somewhat advantage of. You learn to balance these things as you get older.

Sorry your crazy ex GF has cancer. You need to take care of yourself and children first. She's way down on the list of priorities.
Exactly, as you get older you acquire your own responsibilities/ priorities to be attended. The physician heal thyself thing.
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Old 04-22-2013, 04:41 PM   #40
footfootfoot
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Quote:
Originally Posted by glatt View Post
I was always the guy who would do anything for people, but after a while, I realized I was being taken somewhat advantage of. You learn to balance these things as you get older.

Sorry your crazy ex GF has cancer. You need to take care of yourself and children first. She's way down on the list of priorities.
Not even on the list.
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Old 04-22-2013, 07:36 PM   #41
wolf
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There was a woman at the rehab yesterday wearing a shirt that said "F U (pink ribbon) K CANCER."

We're catching on.
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Old 04-23-2013, 08:55 PM   #42
Pete Zicato
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The other way around.

I ran across a Fuck Cancer t-shirt online when Tril first had cancer. I posted the link and said that I thought it was perfect for her. I'm pretty sure that's how it got started.
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Old 04-23-2013, 09:44 PM   #43
xoxoxoBruce
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Yes, they've been on the web a long time. I've seen a lot of avatars in a variety of forums, where women are using a head shot of themselves, or someone else, wearing a pink Fuck Cancer baseball cap.
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Old 04-25-2013, 12:08 PM   #44
Pete Zicato
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Found it.

http://cellar.org/showpost.php?p=386771&postcount=87
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