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Parenting Bringing up the shorties so they aren't completely messed up

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Old 12-21-2004, 07:09 PM   #1
Colonel Panic
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My little rascal wont poop in the kohler

He is just turned 4 and refuses to let it out without a diaper on.
Tried everything: the bribe, the read-a-book-whilst-you-go, the All Out Of Diapers! lie.

The boy's mom worries he'll make himself sick. I'm more worried that he's thinking pampers are a lifetime commitment.

Anybody with a novel idea?

(btw you don't know stubborn if you don't know this kid)
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Old 12-21-2004, 07:18 PM   #2
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Cloth diapers.
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Old 12-21-2004, 08:24 PM   #3
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Colonel Panic
Anybody with a novel idea?

(btw you don't know stubborn if you don't know this kid)
A comedian once defined Panic or perhaps terror (pre-hoopla) as being stuck in bumper to bumper traffic and suddenly realizing that you've just finished a large coffee and a bran muffin.

enough said?
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Old 12-21-2004, 08:28 PM   #4
lumberjim
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put him on the potty and squeeze him until he poops
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Old 12-21-2004, 09:07 PM   #5
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" Oh sonny , don't you want some of this delicious CHOCOLET (exlax ) ????"
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Old 12-21-2004, 11:49 PM   #6
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I feel for you... when my daughter (also very stubborn) was about 5-6 she decided she just wasn't going to, period. She'd go for days at a time in between, with predictable results. At least your son isn't holding back completely.

Have you tried a mini-toilet seat? Could there be some fear of falling in issue?

Maybe you should just let it go for a while and revisit the issue in a couple weeks (i.e. forever from the 4yo perspective). Frustrating as it is, if it becomes a battle for control, you're doomed.
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Old 12-22-2004, 01:55 PM   #7
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my son went at about the same time every day so when my wife and i had 4 days off we decided it was time. when the witching hour came around, we set him on the pot and told him to go. he fought it, but we wouldn't let him up until he went. he is a motorcycle nut so we got him a couple of magazines. he sat there and "read" his books until he couldn't hold it in anymore and did his business. fortunately, my son is a clean freak like me so after a couple of days he realized it was cool not messing up his pants.
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Old 01-14-2005, 12:31 AM   #8
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Peer pressure? Any older siblings or playmates to help him out?
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Old 01-14-2005, 07:59 AM   #9
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Autumn
Peer pressure? Any older siblings or playmates to help him out?
Enough is enough. I'd remove the diapers and let him see you tossing the rest of them away. Put some (easy to wash) pants on him. One or two incidents should fix it. Be as supportive as humanly possible - he's not gonna like it but he can't stay a baby forever. Once the britches are on, do not pressure him to poop - let him tell you when he's ready.

Other ideas:
Take him to the store and let him pick out a mini toilet for himself. Assure him that its his toilet and no one else is allowed to use it.

Keep telling him that he's a Big Boy now and that all his friends are pooping by themselves.

Tell him that you talked to [Spiderman/Hulk/SpongeBob/whoever] and he said to use the toilet. Embellish it some. I've had good luck with the superhero thing.

Buy a big giant candy bar and put it where he can see it. Explain that its his as soon as he makes a deposit and not before. Tell him its a reward from Spiderman/whoever. Bribery is fine if its used sparingly.

Report back.
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Old 01-14-2005, 09:05 AM   #10
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The super-hero undergarments are pretty reinforcing as well. Let him pick out his own but they are only for kids who use the potty.
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Old 01-14-2005, 10:40 AM   #11
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Quote:
Tell him that you talked to [Spiderman/Hulk/SpongeBob/whoever] and he said to use the toilet.
spiderman also said you have to stay in your room while mommy and daddy have a couple days alone time.

the hulk said get me a beer out of the fridge on your way back in.
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Old 01-14-2005, 11:21 AM   #12
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Let me just say, lookout, that if my son ever again attempts to pick the lock on the door to Mrs. Dallas' and my bedroom as he did last weekend, he may need to go live with Spongebob.

But, back to the subject, this all sounds good, but be on the lookout for the reaction of just holidng it all in as long as possible.
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Old 01-14-2005, 12:21 PM   #13
Beestie
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SteveDallas
... the lock on the door to Mrs. Dallas' and my bedroom...
Why (if you don't mind me asking) do you have a lock on a door inside your home?
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Old 01-14-2005, 12:48 PM   #14
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Most of the bedroom doors in my house have locks...

My experience matches what's been said above, for the most part. I took Jamey to pick out some "big-boy" underwear (he picked Spider-man, Spongebob, Buzz Lightyear and Shrek), and told him he wasn't wearing diapers anymore. I was really pleased that he told me he had to go the very first time. But we did have a couple accidents, which proved very motivating. All in all, potty training was much easier than weaning him from the bottle.
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Old 01-14-2005, 01:19 PM   #15
Clodfobble
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Why (if you don't mind me asking) do you have a lock on a door inside your home?

Better the trauma of a kid accidentally locking themselves in and having to disassemble the doorknob, than the trauma of a kid accidentally walking in on an intimate moment.
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