September 26, 2006: Hotrod casket

[Undertoad]

Axlrosen suggests this item from the Ocean County Register. RIP Mr. James D. Calabrese, in this casket which truly reflected your life and interests.

Calabrese – loving husband, father and grandfather, house painter extraordinaire and well-known local hot-rod collector – may have been dead.

But he still had style.

Friends and family tricked out Calabrese's gunmetal gray casket with chrome and aluminum parts from his beloved 1958 Chevy Biscayne, complete with license plates and dangling dice

His other cars attended the funeral.

[Sundae]

It doesn't matter what kind of life you lead, it's the cars you have at your funeral that determine how many hot blondes turn up.

[Trilby]

Just because you're dead it doesn't mean you're not cool.

[CharlieG]

Originally Posted by Brianna

Just because you're dead it doesn't mean you're not cool.

Actually you get cooler once your dead (at least assuming it's below 98.6 ambient)

[glatt]

In 1800 years, Beldor the archaeologist will excavate the grave and determine that this sarcophagus belonged to a tribal leader of great religious significance.

[gerstle]

Originally Posted by glatt

In 1800 years, Beldor the archaeologist will excavate the grave and determine that this sarcophagus belonged to a tribal leader of great religious significance.

or that he was trying to compensate for ...

[SteveDallas]

Friends and family tricked out Calabrese's gunmetal gray casket with chrome and aluminum parts from his beloved 1958 Chevy Biscayne

Am I reading this right? They ripped the parts off the car so they could use them on the casket? Wouldn't that kind of mess up his beloved car?

[milkfish]

That's probably what made the guy collapse in the first place.

If he could have opened his eyes, Calabrese would have seen three gauges staring back at him.

Oil.

Temperature.

Volts.

The gauges belonged on a dashboard of one of his prized hot rods.

The arms on the gauges all pointed to zero.

Okay, oil pressure and voltage, but the temperature was 0 degrees? That's mighty cold for SoCal.

[xoxoxoBruce]

Superfluous stuff, Steve. Front plate, aircleaner, easy to replace. The headers came from a friends garage, The valve covers were new and the gages came from one of his cars but they didn't say which one.

[xoxoxoBruce]

Originally Posted by milkfish

Okay, oil pressure and voltage, but the temperature was 0 degrees? That's mighty cold for SoCal.

It said;

The arms on the gauges all pointed to zero.

Not reading zero degrees.

[SteveDallas]

Originally Posted by xoxoxoBruce

Superfluous stuff, Steve. Front plate, aircleaner, easy to replace. The headers came from a friends garage, The valve covers were new and the gages came from one of his cars but they didn't say which one.

Maybe next time I should consider reading the article before posting.

Having said that I have no clue what's superfluous on a car. (Aren't six spark plug cables redundant? Wouldn't it be OK with just one?)

[Ibby]

Yeah, it'd be okay with just one... until you realize WHY it's redundant.

[BigV]

Redundant? Your vocabulary or your mechanical sensibilities are not up to their usual high standards. Actually, I'm sure it's your mechanical sensibilities, since you've demonstrated your command of the language. Those six spark plug wires, none is redundant.

Oh. You were following on from SD's remark. Nevermind. Still, redundant...

SD: One per spark plug, since they fire independantly. Six cylinders, six plugs, six wires.

[Hoof Hearted]

Six? Wouldn't that have been a V-8?

[morethanpretty]

That seems like the kind of funeral my older brother would like...
Actually I think that he would prefer it if they rigged him to pop up out of the coffin flipping the bird in the middle of Amazing Grace....