Rude behavior

[binky]

I need any advice you guys could offer about how to stop kids (mine are 11 and 7) from interrupting me when I am talking. I don't mean the excited breaking in kind either. They just start talking like I wasn't even talking first. BTW husband does this sometimes too, which is obviously where they get it from. I got so mad yesterday, I threatened to start just walking up and smacking them on the back of the head, no warning or anything. I would like to handle this in a gentler way than that, of course.

[Pie]

Try a "speaking stick". If they try to talk while you're holding the stick, you whack them with it.

(Oh, you didn't want to resort to violence. My bad.)

[binky]

I LIKE IT!

[Cicero]

Every time they do it....wash their mouths out with soap...Keep telling them what you are going to do, and act on it.



I don't have kids...but there are enough of them around that act out of line all the time...stuff my parents would have killed me for.

I recently almost put the "smack down" in such a white trash wwf way on a 10 year old girl that stood up out of her chair and screamed at my husband. Completely out of line...little shit.

That's exactly what I said, since no adults around said anything to her. They just sat there looking stupid....at our house eating our food.

"Hey Kid, don't be ruuude!"

She got one of my hell looks. The kind of look that stops time. She found herself in a daze rather quickly...I can be pretty mean looking.

Think of it this way, you should do something about it before someone like me comes along.......

[binky]

I don't mean to paint my kids as little monsters, Cicero, its really just this one thing that grates on my nerves, they get along well, do well in school, and are helpful at home, I just hate the interrupting thing

[Cicero]

Give it 4 more years....lol!!!

[Cloud]

how bout interrupting THEM for a while everytime they speak. they may get it then.

[binky]

Originally Posted by Cicero

Give it 4 more years....lol!!!

Believe me I know; I have a 27 year old daughter as well and I am amazed she lived through her teenage yers

[binky]

Thanks Cloud, I'll try that, and if no success, then on to the speaking stick.

[regular.joe]

I would recommend totally ignoring them when they interrupt you. completely. Bet it you won't have to do it more then 5 to 10 times and they will stop, or wait until you have your attention tuned into them.

[Bullitt]

If you think the problem is stemming from your husband, talk to him about it and have him start setting the example for your kids. Kids react much more to what they see and experience rather than what they are plain told. If your husbands stops interrupting you in front of the kids, and you ignore the kids when they do it, I would think you would extinguish the behavior quite quickly. If you just scream at them they will only react in fear of being screamed at again, instead of realizing the cause of your outburst.

[Aliantha]

binky, my kids are about the same age, and my older boy 11, is the worst at doing exactly what you're talking about. Lately I've taken to interrupting him by saying, "Aden, I am talking. You must wait your turn." I've been doing it for about a week and a half now and it seems to be helping.

Personally, I don't think it's so much rude although it is annoying. When I say that I think it's an impulse thing in kids. Their brains are working so fast that they want to get every little thought out as soon as it pops into their head, so on some level, they're not even aware that the other person is talking because they've been busy thinking up stuff that they want to say.

I think it's a growing thing that most kids go through. With a little guidance I'm sure yours will realize what they're doing and start showing a bit more respect for your right to speak and be heard, just as I hope mine will also.

[LJ]

We used to be friends with a couple that constantly interrupted each other and everyone else. it was nearly unbearable. if you dont deal with it, and wind up giving in to it....it will just keep getting worse until people want to kill you. we talked to them about it...they knew they did it....but that was normal to them, and they thought it was cute or charming or some shit. pah....if you have to....beat them bloody.

[Griff]

Put your hand up making the stop signal like a cop. Outside that, do not even acknowlege that they've spoken. Don't look at them and don't respond to anything that they've said. Retraining your husband is a big component.

[smurfalicious]

Oh damn. You've touched on one thing that absolutely drives me crazy - interrupting.

My daughter's pretty good about it, only because from the time she started talking, I was up her ass about not interrupting, so I really don't have any advice on how to deal with kids per se... although, I loved Pie's idea about the speaking stick - especially the whacking part.

I have the interrupting problem with Papa Smurf, and that is where I'm struggling. Part of his problem is that he is SO Adult ADD - he can't have a brief conversation without involving 5 different topics - at a minimum - in 3 sentences. But it drives me NUTS that I'm not always the best at expressing myself, and when I finally decide I have something to say, goddamit, I wanna say it without interruption! (One of the lawyers I work for is the same way - albeit much worse - so I can't escape from it.) Papa Smurf knows he does this, knows it sets me off like nothing else, he tries not to, but he still ends up distracted within 7.8 seconds.

My rather childish resolution for the time being is to stomp off mad and refuse to talk to him for the remainder of the evening "since [he] won't listen". Maybe I could try the speaking stick with him. Only, I might get mad and shove it up his ass rather than whack him with it.