True Friends - Page 2

xoxoxoBruce · 02-11-2009, 12:42 AM

When she attacks you, smack her in the snoot.

DanaC · 02-11-2009, 10:26 AM

'drama queen' can be a stage rather than the fixed character. If nobody bothers challenging her on her attitude, then she will continue on her merry way thinking that's acceptable. You're both young and still learning how to be the adults you now are. All the rules start changing and people change and evolve alongside at very different rates.

Don't put up with it. Being her friend and being her emotional punchbag are not the same thing. Putting up with that kind of nonsense wouldn't do her any favours and harms you.

lookout123 · 02-11-2009, 12:44 PM

drama queens? no thanks. run fast and far.

footfootfoot · 02-11-2009, 05:52 PM

http://www.zappos.com/n/es/d/35217/page/1.html

lumberjim · 02-11-2009, 06:19 PM

if she's mean to you and doesnt care enough about your feeeelings to apologize......maybe youre the bitch.

in the relationship, i mean. maybe she's more masculine than you are. i mean....probably she's more masculine. go have a nice cry. you'll feel better.

Spectacle · 02-11-2009, 07:25 PM

I don't think you've known her long enough. Only friends for a year? Now she is showing you how she reacts to things that aren't going good for her...and now that you have seen it (and you don't like it) then you should tell her straight up or just...don't look to her as a good friend.

classicman · 02-11-2009, 07:48 PM

let her go - don't initiate contact with her and when (if) she asks why... tell her. In ten or twenty years you'll laugh about her with your "True Friends."

Cicero · 02-11-2009, 11:40 PM

True Friends tell their friends when they are being a bitch. It's true. I've had to do this several times and will continue to do it. We usually remain friends.

DanaC · 02-12-2009, 05:59 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cicero

True Friends tell their friends when they are being a bitch.

That is so fuckin' true.

Perry Winkle · 02-13-2009, 01:09 AM

I wouldn't take Hoof Hearted's approach. That will end up escalating an already tense situation, which is as mature as treating someone poorly in the first place.

You can still let her know her behavior is unacceptable without escalating. Directly and calmly (if possible) tell her how you feel about the way she's treating you. It doesn't help to be passive aggressive.

Don't start in with dramatic lines like "why would you say that to me?" She'll respond with her excuse about how overwhelmed she is, and it will all become part of an act you will be doomed to repeat as long as the relationship continues.

piercehawkeye45 · 02-13-2009, 08:26 AM

It is not an excuse to consistently attack someone over stress. People do slip every once in a while but if its on a consistent basis that means there are deeper problems or, more likely, she is just a drama queen. Everyone gets stressed and has to deal with it without taking it out on others, its a part of life.

I personally would yell at her the next time she did that to me and directly question her of how she has some right to attack people when she gets stressed but no one else doesn't. Mention how I have stress but I do not use it as an excuse to attack other people, how other people have stress and do not use it to attach other people. That will force the issue upon her that she is either a drama queen and other people have caught on to it and are not willing to take it or she is very bad at controlling stress and has deeper issues. That will force her to change or move on. I would benefit from either.

Shawnee123 · 02-13-2009, 08:33 AM

What do you call a guy who is always yakkin' and bawling...a Drama King?

dar512 · 02-13-2009, 09:34 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Shawnee123

What do you call a guy who is always yakkin' and bawling...a Drama King?

Guys tend to suffer in silence. Unless their looking for pity sex.

A bit of trivia. Camels are known to grow very attached to their mates and male camels will mourn over a lost love. But in their case they're known as dramedarys.

Perry Winkle · 02-13-2009, 09:43 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Shawnee123

What do you call a guy who is always yakkin' and bawling...a Drama King?

A Mongolian porn star.

footfootfoot · 02-13-2009, 09:57 PM

Friends help you move.
True friends help you move bodies.

02-11-2009, 12:42 AM	#16
xoxoxoBruce The future is unwritten Join Date: Oct 2002 Posts: 71,105	When she attacks you, smack her in the snoot. __________________ The descent of man ~ Nixon, Friedman, Reagan, Trump.

02-11-2009, 12:44 PM	#18
lookout123 changed his status to single Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: Right behind you. No, the other side. Posts: 10,308	drama queens? no thanks. run fast and far. __________________ Getting knocked down is no sin, it's not getting back up that's the sin

02-11-2009, 05:52 PM	#19
footfootfoot To shreds, you say? Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: in the house and on the street-how many, many feet we meet! Posts: 18,449	http://www.zappos.com/n/es/d/35217/page/1.html __________________ The internet is a hateful stew of vomit you can never take completely seriously. - Her Fobs

02-11-2009, 06:19 PM	#20
lumberjim I can hear my ears Join Date: Oct 2003 Posts: 25,571	if she's mean to you and doesnt care enough about your feeeelings to apologize......maybe youre the bitch. in the relationship, i mean. maybe she's more masculine than you are. i mean....probably she's more masculine. go have a nice cry. you'll feel better. __________________ This body holding me reminds me of my own mortality Embrace this moment, remember We are eternal, all this pain is an illusion ~MJKeenan

02-11-2009, 07:25 PM	#21
Spectacle Observing the Wine Join Date: Oct 2007 Posts: 85	I don't think you've known her long enough. Only friends for a year? Now she is showing you how she reacts to things that aren't going good for her...and now that you have seen it (and you don't like it) then you should tell her straight up or just...don't look to her as a good friend. __________________ I see.

02-11-2009, 10:26 AM	#17
DanaC We have to go back, Kate! Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: Yorkshire Posts: 25,964	'drama queen' can be a stage rather than the fixed character. If nobody bothers challenging her on her attitude, then she will continue on her merry way thinking that's acceptable. You're both young and still learning how to be the adults you now are. All the rules start changing and people change and evolve alongside at very different rates. Don't put up with it. Being her friend and being her emotional punchbag are not the same thing. Putting up with that kind of nonsense wouldn't do her any favours and harms you.

02-11-2009, 07:48 PM	#22
classicman barely disguised asshole, keeper of all that is holy. Join Date: Nov 2007 Posts: 23,401	let her go - don't initiate contact with her and when (if) she asks why... tell her. In ten or twenty years you'll laugh about her with your "True Friends." __________________ "like strapping a pillow on a bull in a china shop" Bullitt

02-11-2009, 11:40 PM	#23
Cicero Looking forward to open mic night. Join Date: Oct 2006 Location: New Mexico Posts: 5,148	True Friends tell their friends when they are being a bitch. It's true. I've had to do this several times and will continue to do it. We usually remain friends. __________________ Show me a sane man, and I will cure him for you.- Carl Jung

02-13-2009, 01:09 AM	#25
Perry Winkle Esnohplad Semaj Ton Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: A little south of sanity Posts: 2,259	I wouldn't take Hoof Hearted's approach. That will end up escalating an already tense situation, which is as mature as treating someone poorly in the first place. You can still let her know her behavior is unacceptable without escalating. Directly and calmly (if possible) tell her how you feel about the way she's treating you. It doesn't help to be passive aggressive. Don't start in with dramatic lines like "why would you say that to me?" She'll respond with her excuse about how overwhelmed she is, and it will all become part of an act you will be doomed to repeat as long as the relationship continues.

02-13-2009, 08:26 AM	#26
piercehawkeye45 Franklin Pierce Join Date: Oct 2006 Location: Minnesota Posts: 3,695	It is not an excuse to consistently attack someone over stress. People do slip every once in a while but if its on a consistent basis that means there are deeper problems or, more likely, she is just a drama queen. Everyone gets stressed and has to deal with it without taking it out on others, its a part of life. I personally would yell at her the next time she did that to me and directly question her of how she has some right to attack people when she gets stressed but no one else doesn't. Mention how I have stress but I do not use it as an excuse to attack other people, how other people have stress and do not use it to attach other people. That will force the issue upon her that she is either a drama queen and other people have caught on to it and are not willing to take it or she is very bad at controlling stress and has deeper issues. That will force her to change or move on. I would benefit from either. __________________ I like my perspectives like I like my baseball caps: one size fits all.

02-13-2009, 08:33 AM	#27
Shawnee123 Why, you're a regular Alfred E Einstein, ain't ya? Join Date: Jun 2006 Posts: 21,206	What do you call a guy who is always yakkin' and bawling...a Drama King? __________________ A word to the wise ain't necessary - it's the stupid ones who need the advice. --Bill Cosby

02-13-2009, 09:57 PM	#30
footfootfoot To shreds, you say? Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: in the house and on the street-how many, many feet we meet! Posts: 18,449	Friends help you move. True friends help you move bodies. __________________ The internet is a hateful stew of vomit you can never take completely seriously. - Her Fobs

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