May 25, 2010: Pink Handfish

Undertoad · 05-25-2010, 11:43 AM

It walks along the ocean floor instead of swimming. It's the elusive Pink Handfish, one of 14 members of the elusive Handfish family.

Because they're fish. With hands. That's it. Do you need a more complicated name?

Anyway, this beast was last seen in 1999 - and only four of them have ever been documented. But scientists have taken until now, the lazy bastards, to grant it official Different Species(TM) status. Maybe it'll show up more now that it has documentation.

Anyway, I've appealed for a rename: the Pink Age-Spotted Ornery Bastard fish with Silicone-Injected Plumped Lips.

NatGeo has the details, and did we mention this doof has only been seen in the vicinity of Hobart, Tasmania.

lumberjim · 05-25-2010, 11:54 AM

Before I was born late one night,
My Papa said everything's alright
The doctor laughed,when mama laid down,
With a stomach bouncing all around
Mama gave birth to the hand-fish

I could barely walk when I milked a cow
When I was three, I pushed a plow
While chopping wood I moved my legs,
And I started dancing while I gathered eggs
Townfolk clapped, I was only six
he'll out dance em' all
"He's a born hand-fish!"

Oh yeah, yeah, yeah - everybody!

Born to hand-fish, baby,
Born to hand-fish baby- yeah!

How low can you go?
How low can you go?
How low can you go?
How low can you go?

Higher, higher, higher and higher
Now can you hand-fish, baby?
Oh can you hand-fish, baby?
Oh yeah, oh yeah, oh yeah, yeah
Born to hand-fish, oh yeah!

Shawnee123 · 05-25-2010, 12:03 PM

If you could capture one, you could take it on tour and make money hand over fish.

Sheldonrs · 05-25-2010, 12:31 PM

I'd change the name to the Pink Edward G. Robinson Fish.

Spexxvet · 05-25-2010, 02:32 PM

He's a handsome fish.

Diaphone Jim · 05-25-2010, 02:50 PM

Finger food?

Shawnee123 · 05-25-2010, 02:53 PM

His nose looks tickly.

Sheldonrs · 05-25-2010, 05:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Shawnee123

His nose looks tickly.

That's not his nose.

monster · 05-25-2010, 09:20 PM

That's no handfish! That's Shawnee on a night out making her way to the bar!

Shawnee123 · 05-26-2010, 07:11 AM

Yeah, look at me! You can dress me up, but you can't ____ (fill in the blank)

glub glub glub

ZenGum · 05-26-2010, 07:14 AM

So that's where fish fingers come from.

HungLikeJesus · 05-26-2010, 07:15 AM

Over here we call them fish dicks.

Sheldonrs · 05-28-2010, 08:32 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by HungLikeJesus

Over here we call them fish dicks.

And yours appears to be covered in Bass Turds.

Shawnee123 · 05-28-2010, 08:34 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sheldonrs

And yours appears to be covered in Bass Turds.

You so funny.

Glinda · 05-28-2010, 11:45 AM

"Pink handfish" sounds like a euphemism for something naughty.

05-25-2010, 11:43 AM	#1
Undertoad Radical Centrist Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: Cottage of Prussia Posts: 31,423	May 25, 2010: Pink Handfish It walks along the ocean floor instead of swimming. It's the elusive Pink Handfish, one of 14 members of the elusive Handfish family. Because they're fish. With hands. That's it. Do you need a more complicated name? Anyway, this beast was last seen in 1999 - and only four of them have ever been documented. But scientists have taken until now, the lazy bastards, to grant it official Different Species(TM) status. Maybe it'll show up more now that it has documentation. Anyway, I've appealed for a rename: the Pink Age-Spotted Ornery Bastard fish with Silicone-Injected Plumped Lips. NatGeo has the details, and did we mention this doof has only been seen in the vicinity of Hobart, Tasmania.

05-25-2010, 11:54 AM	#2
lumberjim I can hear my ears Join Date: Oct 2003 Posts: 25,571	Before I was born late one night, My Papa said everything's alright The doctor laughed,when mama laid down, With a stomach bouncing all around Mama gave birth to the hand-fish I could barely walk when I milked a cow When I was three, I pushed a plow While chopping wood I moved my legs, And I started dancing while I gathered eggs Townfolk clapped, I was only six he'll out dance em' all "He's a born hand-fish!" Oh yeah, yeah, yeah - everybody! Born to hand-fish, baby, Born to hand-fish baby- yeah! How low can you go? How low can you go? How low can you go? How low can you go? Higher, higher, higher and higher Now can you hand-fish, baby? Oh can you hand-fish, baby? Oh yeah, oh yeah, oh yeah, yeah Born to hand-fish, oh yeah! __________________ This body holding me reminds me of my own mortality Embrace this moment, remember We are eternal, all this pain is an illusion ~MJKeenan

05-25-2010, 12:03 PM	#3
Shawnee123 Why, you're a regular Alfred E Einstein, ain't ya? Join Date: Jun 2006 Posts: 21,206	If you could capture one, you could take it on tour and make money hand over fish. __________________ A word to the wise ain't necessary - it's the stupid ones who need the advice. --Bill Cosby

05-25-2010, 12:31 PM	#4
Sheldonrs Master Dwellar Join Date: Oct 2006 Location: Los Angeles, CA Posts: 4,412	I'd change the name to the Pink Edward G. Robinson Fish. __________________ Laugh and the world laughs with you; cry and the world laughs AT you.

05-25-2010, 02:32 PM	#5
Spexxvet Makes some feel uncomfortable Join Date: Dec 2005 Posts: 10,346	He's a handsome fish. __________________ "I'm certainly free, nay compelled, to spread the gospel of Spex. " - xoxoxoBruce

05-25-2010, 02:50 PM	#6
Diaphone Jim Junior Master Dwellar Join Date: Sep 2007 Location: Northern California Posts: 2,122	Finger food?

05-25-2010, 02:53 PM	#7
Shawnee123 Why, you're a regular Alfred E Einstein, ain't ya? Join Date: Jun 2006 Posts: 21,206	His nose looks tickly. __________________ A word to the wise ain't necessary - it's the stupid ones who need the advice. --Bill Cosby

05-25-2010, 09:20 PM	#9
monster I hear them call the tide Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Perpetual Chaos Posts: 30,852	That's no handfish! That's Shawnee on a night out making her way to the bar! __________________ The most difficult thing is the decision to act, the rest is merely tenacity Amelia Earhart

05-26-2010, 07:11 AM	#10
Shawnee123 Why, you're a regular Alfred E Einstein, ain't ya? Join Date: Jun 2006 Posts: 21,206	Yeah, look at me! You can dress me up, but you can't ____ (fill in the blank) glub glub glub __________________ A word to the wise ain't necessary - it's the stupid ones who need the advice. --Bill Cosby

05-26-2010, 07:14 AM	#11
ZenGum Doctor Wtf Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: Badelaide, Baustralia Posts: 12,861	So that's where fish fingers come from. __________________ Shut up and hug. MoreThanPretty, Nov 5, 2008. Just because I'm nominally polite, does not make me a pussy. Sundae Girl.

05-26-2010, 07:15 AM	#12
HungLikeJesus Only looks like a disaster tourist Join Date: Feb 2007 Location: above 7,000 feet Posts: 7,208	Over here we call them fish dicks. __________________ Keep Your Bodies Off My Lawn SteveDallas's Random Thread Picker.

05-28-2010, 11:45 AM	#15
Glinda Fucktard Resistance League Join Date: Jun 2008 Location: 1.14 acres of heaven Posts: 1,512	"Pink handfish" sounds like a euphemism for something naughty.

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