Merry F'in Christmas - I want a divorce. - Page 28

05-06-2006, 02:40 PM

*sending you loving and healing energy*

WabUfvot5 · 05-09-2006, 08:44 PM

How's it going lookout?

lookout123 · 05-14-2006, 11:01 AM

alive and kicking. i've got my rental house set up and running now, and my new build should be done around january or february. i don't have time to really go into details right now but cliff's notes version:

1) interactions between the not-quite-ex are really really stupid at this point. she is now taking "niravam" to control her panic attacks - but she is perfectly mentally healthy, remember?

2) my son's teacher pulled me aside and asked what is going on. i'd already told her about the separation/divorce. apparently on the 3 days a week i drop him off at school he is happy, friendly... normal little lookout. on the 2 days she drops him off he gets in trouble, cries, and refuses to do some of his projects. not good.

3) anybody remember my goal to triple my income for the year? yeah, well with all the stress i haven't been able to do that. but i have more than doubled it year over year. stupid bitch complaining that i don't make enough money...

anyway, i'll fill in some gaps later.

footfootfoot · 05-14-2006, 11:06 AM

Dude, that is a bummer about the little lookout. It's just fucking unfair. I'm praying that things improve for him and you somehow. I suppose it would n't hurt to pray that she wakes up and smells... something, anything.

That steams me. Sorry.

WabUfvot5 · 05-14-2006, 03:00 PM

As bad as it all sounds it's actually helping your custody argument. It's too bad there is more than one victim in this whole ordeal

wolf · 05-14-2006, 03:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by lookout123

3) anybody remember my goal to triple my income for the year? yeah, well with all the stress i haven't been able to do that. but i have more than doubled it year over year.

Why fight to triple your income when she's going to get half of it?

lookout123 · 05-16-2006, 12:14 AM

no spousal support. one of her big arguments for keeping the house, etc. is that she is the one who always made the money, started the projects, etc. that is BS but i let her make the case, because she managed to argue herself out of spousal support. she makes a rather significant income herself anyway.

child support will be a necessary evil, but for now it is not needed because i am carrying medical, paying his tuition, etc.

and even if making more just means i'm giving her more... i know long term it isn't a healthy goal, but i want her every single month when she is struggling to maintain her lifestyle to 1) realize that i was integral in building that lifestyle, 2) she can't do it without me. yes, i know that it is likely that she will just find a replacement to make life easier. but she will still know.

she already does, but won't admit it. we each had to submit our YTD incomes last week and she nearly shit when she realized that so far this year i've made more than we did as a couple the entire year our son was born.

it's not about the money for me. it never was. but apparently it became all about the money for her, so i want her to see how badly she effed up.

05-16-2006, 09:09 AM

I was engaged for five years to a young woman... she was pretty abusive, but I did not really understand that. It was all I knew at that point.
She cheated on me and left me one night... a while later she called me all upset and wanted to "talk". She was two hours away.
By the time she got to me I had realized who she was and all she had put me through.
When she arrived I informed her that I wanted to move-on with my life and find someone who would not try to kill me (another story).

She freaked. There is nothing better you can do for yourself than move on as quickly as possible and focus on being as healthy as you can for yourself and your son.
I'm sure you know that, but it may help to hear another's verification.
The day you truly realize you are better off and you are your own best and healthiest companion for your son now will be a very liberating day... it is freeing.
There is another side to that lake.

05-17-2006, 12:15 PM

Living well is the best revenge.
George Herbert (1593 - 1633)

footfootfoot · 05-17-2006, 11:54 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by lookout123
3) anybody remember my goal to triple my income for the year? yeah, well with all the stress i haven't been able to do that. but i have more than doubled it year over year.

Quote:

Originally Posted by wolf

Why fight to triple your income when she's going to get half of it?

This reminds me of a probably inappropriate joke, but when has that ever stopped me?

Our hero is walking along the beach,sorting things out. Bottle. Genie. three wishes. A catch: what ever you wish for your adversary gets twice what you get.

Our hero wishes for:
1) Painlessly straightened teeth. His adversary gets perfect, white, painlessly straightened teeth.
2) Beautiful 10,000 square foot pleasure palace. Adversary? 20,000sf.
The genie asks "what is your last wish?"
Our hero says: "I want you to beat me half to death."

ok wrong.

NZLcyclist · 05-19-2006, 01:35 PM

Sounds like a right pickle mr Lookout

hope things get a bit better for the lil one, sounds like he aint having fun all the time

Good Luck

lookout123 · 05-20-2006, 01:54 AM

**********warning: drunk post************

ok, so i really hate being angry at her. yeah, i know that sounds stupid after everything, but it is true. in all rational thought i want nothing to do with her and wouldn't take her back if she begged... but i'm not necessarily rational.

right now i've only got too speeds and i hate it.

1) i remember the good. the person she was. AND I WANT HER BACK. with such intensity that it is frightening.

2) i focus on the heartbreaking torture she has put me through and it takes every ounce of willpower i have not to strangle her.

my category 1 moods prevent me from moving on and finding enjoyment in life. my category 2 moods can eat me alive. i don't like being angry and bitter. it just isn't me. it was once - it took a lot of work and pain to not be that person - i don't want to be that person again.

there has to be a middle ground. for lack of a better term i'll call it indifference. i want to find it. i need to find it. i pretend to live there, but it is just an act.

WabUfvot5 · 05-20-2006, 05:48 AM

A rock thrown in the water makes a lot of waves but they keep getting lesser and eventually things will calm down. Ride the waves. Don't drown, don't fight. Easier said than done I know.

limey · 05-20-2006, 01:03 PM

Time lookout. Time is what you need to find that middle ground. Sorry but I can't say how much. Hang in there.

xoxoxoBruce · 05-21-2006, 05:10 PM

Time heals all wounds....
..and wounds all heels.

05-14-2006, 11:06 AM	#409
footfootfoot To shreds, you say? Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: in the house and on the street-how many, many feet we meet! Posts: 18,449	Dude, that is a bummer about the little lookout. It's just fucking unfair. I'm praying that things improve for him and you somehow. I suppose it would n't hurt to pray that she wakes up and smells... something, anything. That steams me. Sorry. __________________ The internet is a hateful stew of vomit you can never take completely seriously. - Her Fobs

05-20-2006, 01:03 PM	#419
limey Encroaching on your decrees Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: An island within the south-west coast of Scotland Posts: 7,016	Time lookout. Time is what you need to find that middle ground. Sorry but I can't say how much. Hang in there. __________________ Living it up on the edge ... of civilisation, within the southwest coast of

05-21-2006, 05:10 PM	#420
xoxoxoBruce The future is unwritten Join Date: Oct 2002 Posts: 71,105	Time heals all wounds.... ..and wounds all heels. __________________ The descent of man ~ Nixon, Friedman, Reagan, Trump.

05-06-2006, 02:40 PM	#406
rkzenrage Guest Posts: n/a	sending you loving and healing energy

05-09-2006, 08:44 PM	#407
WabUfvot5 Operations Operative Join Date: May 2002 Posts: 634	How's it going lookout?

05-14-2006, 11:01 AM	#408
lookout123 changed his status to single Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: Right behind you. No, the other side. Posts: 10,308	alive and kicking. i've got my rental house set up and running now, and my new build should be done around january or february. i don't have time to really go into details right now but cliff's notes version: 1) interactions between the not-quite-ex are really really stupid at this point. she is now taking "niravam" to control her panic attacks - but she is perfectly mentally healthy, remember? 2) my son's teacher pulled me aside and asked what is going on. i'd already told her about the separation/divorce. apparently on the 3 days a week i drop him off at school he is happy, friendly... normal little lookout. on the 2 days she drops him off he gets in trouble, cries, and refuses to do some of his projects. not good. 3) anybody remember my goal to triple my income for the year? yeah, well with all the stress i haven't been able to do that. but i have more than doubled it year over year. stupid bitch complaining that i don't make enough money... anyway, i'll fill in some gaps later.

05-14-2006, 03:00 PM	#410
WabUfvot5 Operations Operative Join Date: May 2002 Posts: 634	As bad as it all sounds it's actually helping your custody argument. It's too bad there is more than one victim in this whole ordeal

05-16-2006, 12:14 AM	#412
lookout123 changed his status to single Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: Right behind you. No, the other side. Posts: 10,308	no spousal support. one of her big arguments for keeping the house, etc. is that she is the one who always made the money, started the projects, etc. that is BS but i let her make the case, because she managed to argue herself out of spousal support. she makes a rather significant income herself anyway. child support will be a necessary evil, but for now it is not needed because i am carrying medical, paying his tuition, etc. and even if making more just means i'm giving her more... i know long term it isn't a healthy goal, but i want her every single month when she is struggling to maintain her lifestyle to 1) realize that i was integral in building that lifestyle, 2) she can't do it without me. yes, i know that it is likely that she will just find a replacement to make life easier. but she will still know. she already does, but won't admit it. we each had to submit our YTD incomes last week and she nearly shit when she realized that so far this year i've made more than we did as a couple the entire year our son was born. it's not about the money for me. it never was. but apparently it became all about the money for her, so i want her to see how badly she effed up.

05-16-2006, 09:09 AM	#413
rkzenrage Guest Posts: n/a	I was engaged for five years to a young woman... she was pretty abusive, but I did not really understand that. It was all I knew at that point. She cheated on me and left me one night... a while later she called me all upset and wanted to "talk". She was two hours away. By the time she got to me I had realized who she was and all she had put me through. When she arrived I informed her that I wanted to move-on with my life and find someone who would not try to kill me (another story). She freaked. There is nothing better you can do for yourself than move on as quickly as possible and focus on being as healthy as you can for yourself and your son. I'm sure you know that, but it may help to hear another's verification. The day you truly realize you are better off and you are your own best and healthiest companion for your son now will be a very liberating day... it is freeing. There is another side to that lake.

05-17-2006, 12:15 PM	#414
rkzenrage Guest Posts: n/a	Living well is the best revenge. George Herbert (1593 - 1633)

05-19-2006, 01:35 PM	#416
NZLcyclist n00bl3+ Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: Hamilton, New Zealand Posts: 13	Sounds like a right pickle mr Lookout hope things get a bit better for the lil one, sounds like he aint having fun all the time Good Luck

05-20-2006, 01:54 AM	#417
lookout123 changed his status to single Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: Right behind you. No, the other side. Posts: 10,308	********warning: drunk post********** ok, so i really hate being angry at her. yeah, i know that sounds stupid after everything, but it is true. in all rational thought i want nothing to do with her and wouldn't take her back if she begged... but i'm not necessarily rational. right now i've only got too speeds and i hate it. 1) i remember the good. the person she was. AND I WANT HER BACK. with such intensity that it is frightening. 2) i focus on the heartbreaking torture she has put me through and it takes every ounce of willpower i have not to strangle her. my category 1 moods prevent me from moving on and finding enjoyment in life. my category 2 moods can eat me alive. i don't like being angry and bitter. it just isn't me. it was once - it took a lot of work and pain to not be that person - i don't want to be that person again. there has to be a middle ground. for lack of a better term i'll call it indifference. i want to find it. i need to find it. i pretend to live there, but it is just an act.

05-20-2006, 05:48 AM	#418
WabUfvot5 Operations Operative Join Date: May 2002 Posts: 634	A rock thrown in the water makes a lot of waves but they keep getting lesser and eventually things will calm down. Ride the waves. Don't drown, don't fight. Easier said than done I know.

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