Liver and Cherry

[limey]

Glatt, a "day hospital" is a day centre which provides structure, activities, support and sometimes treatment to those who attend. The ones I've known of are only open weekdays. You are right, Sundae's plan is a good one.


Sent by thought transference

[xoxoxoBruce]

It's only "a day centre", but even without structured programs it's a sanctuary with amenities. That should make it easier to get the apartment squared away in the evening, a little at a time, knowing in the morning the sanctuary is there.
Of course the danger is going back to the apartment and hiding under a blanket until morning, knowing the sanctuary is there.

[Sundae]

Originally Posted by xoxoxoBruce

Of course the danger is going back to the apartment and hiding under a blanket until morning, knowing the sanctuary is there.

That's pretty much what I've been doing the last few days, not so much because this is good or easier, but because to start with they recommend being here all day. By the time I get home it's cold and dark and I'm not up to anything.

I'm "off" tomorrow, and the morning is free for me to make a start - I have a follow up at the Dental Hospital tomorrow afternoon, which will eat up pretty much the whole afternoon, what with buses and all. Once I'm not spending all day here I will be able to start making a difference back at the flat. I expect the impact I make will run in tandem with an improvement in my mental health.

It took over two hours to get here this morning and although I don't expect the journey home to be quite so long (as none of it will be during rush hour) I doubt it will be any faster than 1.5 hours at any point. Rather than cutting down my daily hours when I am advised they feel I'm ready to attend less, I think I will cut down on the days I attend. Which will mean daylight hours in Otley for cleaning, chores and walking.

It's up to me to improve my living conditions, and I will. It's all for my own benefit after all.

[xoxoxoBruce]

Originally Posted by Sundae

It's up to me to improve my living conditions, and I will. It's all for my own benefit after all.

No no no, that attitude is too easy to transition into, fuck it, it doesn't hurt anyone else so why bother.

Keep in mind the Queen might stop in for a cuppa, or somebody really important like Limey or Dana or your Mom.
Now square that shit away so you don't get caught unprepared.

[Sundae]

I was reminded tonight of one of the longer term effects of my last detox.
Anyone who knows me - here or certainly in person - knows I have a fertile imagination which tends towards horror and The Dark. And not in a one-upmanship way. I reserve that for dirty jokes and real life stories, usually involving my titties. Big but not clever as it were.

Anyway. Like I was saying, these things genuinely pop into ma heid.
Except now, having had real hallucinations, they sometimes frighten me.
Tonight for example, I went to close the curtains and it seemed as if one of the streetlights had gone out as I crossed the room. Now I'm 99% sure it was just the wind and the tree branches moving. But I closed my eyes like a little kid because my brain said, "Hey, what if you stood here and one by one every light leading up to the flat went out?"

It's a horror cliche, but really, imagine it happening for real.
And I could.
And I was scared I would see it happen.
No more scary What If games for Sundae.

And stupidist thing of all?
I was never scared by my hallucinations. Aside from the practical one about my debts, and even then it took an actual dream about a man wearing my pink hat to make me scream.

[Sundae]

Went for a consultation the other week.
They're happy with my blood. It's not "normal", as in it would raise eyebrows for someone without my history. But it's returning to normal. And the indicators they are looking at take three months or more to change; it's not like a urine test or breathalyser or owt.

I was referred for a sonogram even before the blood results came through, because I'm in the system and they have to cover all bases. Had that yesterday - it was marvellous. I bitched a bit when I got the appointment, because you can't eat or drink for six hours beforehand, and the test was scheduled for 17.15; I've always had an early appointment before, so it'd only been a case of skipping breakfast. But in the end it wasn't onerous.

I arrived early, was seen early, and treated very kindly and gently (I've been proper jabbed up under the ribs for some scans).

Okay, I got sonogram jizz on one of my nice new bras - you have to wear nice undies when going into hospital, them's the rules. But I have three good bras now, so I can afford to have one out of commission.

I was in and out BEFORE my scheduled appointment time. Well worth a short spell of not eating. Made up for it with a Gregg's baguette in the bus station.

Apparently I'll get another appointment to discuss the results. I bet I don't. If my bloods are anything to go by, the results will just be sent in a letter to my GP and it'll be six months until a routine appointment. I'm IN the system, but I'm not considered at risk any more. Which is a plus, given that Addenbrooke's told me I had three years in 2013 (well, okay, three years if I didn't make lifestyle changes.)

[limey]

Still, it'll give you an excuse to go and check in with the supportive GP in a couple of weeks, no?
Good on yer, girl, thanks for working at it to keep yourself around for us. x

[Griff]

Thanks for the good update.

[classicman]

Yay, I like good news.

[BigV]

I love hearing good news like this from you too. Thanks!

[Carruthers]

Well done, Sundae! All that effort is paying off.

[fargon]

Yay Sundae, you are doing good girl.

[Gravdigr]

[orthodoc]

Good to hear, Sundae!

[Big Sarge]

Great to hear the good news