Dweller NSFW pics for 2008 - get it all out there!! - Page 10

lumberjim · 05-10-2008, 09:54 PM

small hands?

Elspode · 05-10-2008, 10:54 PM

I can't figure out if everyone's cock is that much bigger than mine, or if people whose cocks are somewhat normally sized just don't take pictures and post 'em. Which, as luck would have it, reminds me of a story of my youth...

I had a Polaroid camera when I was about 12. One night when I was home alone, and occupying myself with an extended bit of self examination, I decided it would be a good idea to take a picture of my tumescent 12 year old tool.

The novelty soon wore thin, and knowing my mom and stepdad would be home soon, I panicked in my guilt and shame, ran to the toilet, and flushed the offending B&W shot.

Unfortunately, I didn't stay around to see if it was subsumed, and I went back to bed and fell into horny, fitful sleep. Next thing I knew, my mother was gently shaking me awake, with a dripping photo in her hand...and she was sobbing.

"Patrick, I don't understand...why did you do this?"

"I don't know Mom...I'm sorry."

We left it at that, she gave me pic, I tore it up, and she retired.

The next day when I got up, she was sitting in the living room, looking sheepish. I thought I was going to get a lecture. Instead, she looked at me very seriously and said, "I talked to your stepfather last night after I left your room. I asked him if he'd ever done anything like that when he was young. He said 'no'. I asked him, 'why not'?"

His reply?

"Because I didn't have a camera..."

Thanks for reading this brief insight into my formative years.

sugarpop · 11-26-2008, 06:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Elspode

I can't figure out if everyone's cock is that much bigger than mine, or if people whose cocks are somewhat normally sized just don't take pictures and post 'em...

They take pictures with a dwarf's hand on them.

elSicomoro · 05-10-2008, 10:53 PM

I wrote a song called "Fast Hands" in the early 90s.

Cloud · 05-10-2008, 10:56 PM

@ Cicero: lovely, so smooth . . . ooh.

(wipes drool off mouth)

Elspode · 05-10-2008, 11:00 PM

Good lord...are you just *now* getting around to looking at that wondrous white-clad work of art of hers?

Dingleschmutz · 05-10-2008, 11:01 PM

Jesus Christ, I posted that last night??

Fuck, I better check my phone to see who I drunk dialed last night.

Dingleschmutz · 05-10-2008, 11:05 PM

Arrgh, I KNEW it! Drunk-dialed the ex. 5 minutes, 46 seconds long... No idea what transpired. I'm removing her from the index for good now.

Cloud · 05-10-2008, 11:12 PM

what can I say? I'm slow! plus, I generally don't open this thread at work.

Next time, Cicerohunny--without the pants!

Elspode · 05-10-2008, 11:31 PM

Oh, God...yes, please. Contact Labrat for thong photo pointers.

Dingleschmutz · 05-10-2008, 11:37 PM

I wholeheartedly agree. We need more female nudity or pseudo-nudity to wash away the transgressions of me posting pictures in this thread.

xoxoxoBruce · 05-10-2008, 11:44 PM

I've got more news for you, you didn't post it in this thread, I moved it here.

Dingleschmutz · 05-10-2008, 11:48 PM

Woohoo! I hope you're serious, I was racking up the stupid points last night, that would be just another notch on the belt. I'm rereading what I posted on other forums last night and having a hearty gut laugh. What a tard.

Cloud · 05-10-2008, 11:48 PM

@ Dingleschmutz. whoa! missed that too. Now sure how I could miss that one.

Dingleschmutz · 05-11-2008, 12:02 AM

It's because my hands are small, they're easy to miss.

05-10-2008, 09:54 PM	#1
lumberjim I can hear my ears Join Date: Oct 2003 Posts: 25,571	small hands? __________________ This body holding me reminds me of my own mortality Embrace this moment, remember We are eternal, all this pain is an illusion ~MJKeenan

05-10-2008, 10:54 PM	#2
Elspode When Do I Get Virtual Unreality? Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: Raytown, Missouri Posts: 12,719	I can't figure out if everyone's cock is that much bigger than mine, or if people whose cocks are somewhat normally sized just don't take pictures and post 'em. Which, as luck would have it, reminds me of a story of my youth... I had a Polaroid camera when I was about 12. One night when I was home alone, and occupying myself with an extended bit of self examination, I decided it would be a good idea to take a picture of my tumescent 12 year old tool. The novelty soon wore thin, and knowing my mom and stepdad would be home soon, I panicked in my guilt and shame, ran to the toilet, and flushed the offending B&W shot. Unfortunately, I didn't stay around to see if it was subsumed, and I went back to bed and fell into horny, fitful sleep. Next thing I knew, my mother was gently shaking me awake, with a dripping photo in her hand...and she was sobbing. "Patrick, I don't understand...why did you do this?" "I don't know Mom...I'm sorry." We left it at that, she gave me pic, I tore it up, and she retired. The next day when I got up, she was sitting in the living room, looking sheepish. I thought I was going to get a lecture. Instead, she looked at me very seriously and said, "I talked to your stepfather last night after I left your room. I asked him if he'd ever done anything like that when he was young. He said 'no'. I asked him, 'why not'?" His reply? "Because I didn't have a camera..." Thanks for reading this brief insight into my formative years. __________________ "To those of you who are wearing ties, I think my dad would appreciate it if you took them off." - Robert Moog

05-10-2008, 10:56 PM	#5
Cloud ... Join Date: Feb 2007 Posts: 8,360	@ Cicero: lovely, so smooth . . . ooh. (wipes drool off mouth) __________________ "Guard your honor. Let your reputation fall where it will. And outlive the bastards!"

05-10-2008, 11:00 PM	#6
Elspode When Do I Get Virtual Unreality? Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: Raytown, Missouri Posts: 12,719	Good lord...are you just now getting around to looking at that wondrous white-clad work of art of hers? __________________ "To those of you who are wearing ties, I think my dad would appreciate it if you took them off." - Robert Moog

05-10-2008, 11:12 PM	#9
Cloud ... Join Date: Feb 2007 Posts: 8,360	what can I say? I'm slow! plus, I generally don't open this thread at work. Next time, Cicerohunny--without the pants! __________________ "Guard your honor. Let your reputation fall where it will. And outlive the bastards!"

05-10-2008, 10:53 PM	#4
elSicomoro Person who doesn't update the user title Join Date: Jan 2001 Posts: 12,486	I wrote a song called "Fast Hands" in the early 90s.

05-10-2008, 11:01 PM	#7
Dingleschmutz is not a palindrome... Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: Des Moines Posts: 341	Jesus Christ, I posted that last night?? Fuck, I better check my phone to see who I drunk dialed last night.

05-10-2008, 11:05 PM	#8
Dingleschmutz is not a palindrome... Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: Des Moines Posts: 341	Arrgh, I KNEW it! Drunk-dialed the ex. 5 minutes, 46 seconds long... No idea what transpired. I'm removing her from the index for good now.

05-10-2008, 11:31 PM	#10
Elspode When Do I Get Virtual Unreality? Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: Raytown, Missouri Posts: 12,719	Oh, God...yes, please. Contact Labrat for thong photo pointers. __________________ "To those of you who are wearing ties, I think my dad would appreciate it if you took them off." - Robert Moog

05-10-2008, 11:37 PM	#11
Dingleschmutz is not a palindrome... Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: Des Moines Posts: 341	I wholeheartedly agree. We need more female nudity or pseudo-nudity to wash away the transgressions of me posting pictures in this thread.

05-10-2008, 11:44 PM	#12
xoxoxoBruce The future is unwritten Join Date: Oct 2002 Posts: 71,105	I've got more news for you, you didn't post it in this thread, I moved it here. __________________ The descent of man ~ Nixon, Friedman, Reagan, Trump.

05-10-2008, 11:48 PM	#13
Dingleschmutz is not a palindrome... Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: Des Moines Posts: 341	Woohoo! I hope you're serious, I was racking up the stupid points last night, that would be just another notch on the belt. I'm rereading what I posted on other forums last night and having a hearty gut laugh. What a tard.

05-11-2008, 12:02 AM	#15
Dingleschmutz is not a palindrome... Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: Des Moines Posts: 341	It's because my hands are small, they're easy to miss.

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