Separated by a Common Language?

[monster]

I prefer milk.

[glatt]

I've always wondered what the milk fat content of Half and Half is. It's half milk, half cream. But milk can be anywhere from 0% to 4%, and cream can be anywhere from 18% to 36% depending on if you are getting a lighter table cream or a heavier whipping cream. It's a real math problem.

This chart at wikipedia answers this and more.

Half and half is 10% to 18% milk fat. Seems kind of loose to me. If you have a name for something, it should have a specific fat content. Skim milk is always 0%. Whole milk is always 4%. Why can't Half and Half always be say, 14%?

If I ran a dairy, I'd put the fat content in a big font on the label regardless of what was being produced. Butter would have a 100%, skim milk a 0%, and everything in between would be clearly labeled as well.

[squirell nutkin]

Originally Posted by monster

I prefer milk.

[classicman]

I thought squirrels preferred nuts

[DanaC]

Talking of being separated by a common language, and going back to the perennial topic of US remakes of Uk shows:

I just caught a little of the US Life On Mars: specifically the ending....wtf? They had them actually go to mars??? And then having given it this ridiculously literal ending, they played out with an Elton John track...rather than Bowie's LIFE ON MARS!

Having depressed myself thoroughly seeing this I fell upon a clip of the pilot for the USA Red Dwarf...I didnt know there'd been such a beast. It is truly awful. And pointless.

Will you guys (not here on the cellar, i mean more generally) please learn to cope with non-American versions of the English language and then demand that your tv networks stop destroying great shows? In return I promise we won't remake Frasier, Friends and M*A*S*H....and whilst were at it, if you endeavour not to rewrite all out books, I solemnly swear we'll read Catcher in the Rye in it's original American.

*grins*

sorry. That was unfair. I know the whys and the wherefores and the d'ye mind if I don'ts. I do understand. But it is terribly frustrating at times.

[glatt]

Originally Posted by DanaC

I do understand. But it is terribly frustrating at times.

I don't understand why it would be frustrating. You don't have to watch the American version of your favorite British whatever. Just watch the British one.

Sure, I can understand rolling your eyes or mocking, and we Americans probably even deserve it, but being frustrated is what I don't get.

[Shawnee123]

Heeheee, I have no interest in any of the shows, remakes or otherwise, for me to ponder the difference in the versions.

Unless of course, Benny Hill is in one. He's so goddam funny and all.

[Clodfobble]

Originally Posted by DanaC

Having depressed myself thoroughly seeing this I fell upon a clip of the pilot for the USA Red Dwarf...I didnt know there'd been such a beast. It is truly awful. And pointless.

Okay, but... Can I say something heretical? I've seen the British version of Red Dwarf, and I didn't think it was funny either. I'm sure the American version sucked too, I'm just saying. I also didn't like Black Adder in the slightest. [duck and cover]

[DanaC]

Originally Posted by glatt

I don't understand why it would be frustrating. You don't have to watch the American version of your favorite British whatever. Just watch the British one.

Sure, I can understand rolling your eyes or mocking, and we Americans probably even deserve it, but being frustrated is what I don't get.

Two reasons:

1: silly and illogical as it is, I feel mildly insulted that we're not seen as good enough in our own right. We love your shows and that's not quite reciprocated. ....yes I know, chip on shoulder :P

2: Some of the best things we've made won't get seen by most Americans and I think that's a shame. Like when I come on here talking about Doctor Who, or even US shows like Dexter, I want the world to see the shows I love :P


[eta] Forgive me, I'm a tv fanatic :P

[DanaC]

Originally Posted by Clodfobble

Okay, but... Can I say something heretical? I've seen the British version of Red Dwarf, and I didn't think it was funny either. I'm sure the American version sucked too, I'm just saying. I also didn't like Black Adder in the slightest. [duck and cover]

Red Dwarf is a little like Marmite: you either love it or loathe it

You didn't like Black Adder???? Get thee to a nunnery!

[Sundae]

Originally Posted by Clodfobble

Okay, but... Can I say something heretical? I've seen the British version of Red Dwarf, and I didn't think it was funny either. I'm sure the American version sucked too, I'm just saying. I also didn't like Black Adder in the slightest. [duck and cover]

I suppose it kinda depends when you saw it.
Both series were ground-breaking. I watched Blackadder I from the third episode. That was when the 'rents first got a video. I was too young to watch it as it was broadcast (21.00) Of course I've watched it countless times on video & DVD since - I even have the script book.

Same with Red Dwarf. It was the talk of the changing rooms - I thought it was a mediaeval comedy show (because of the title) and begged the 'rents to tape it. I was gutted that I'd missed so much!

They're dated now, of course. No, reallt - very dated. But those of us who watched them during a comedy drought (being FAR to young to appreciate the live "alternative comedy" explosion happening in London) know selected episodes by heart and can still laugh at them.

I've watched some "classic" SNL sketches and been as unmoved as Mount Rushmore. Given that they're acclaimed by some of my comedy heroes, I think it's less an international divide and more just time and place.

FTR - I'm the only person I know who really reveres the first series of Blackadder and fades away series by series. And I also know people who despise The League of Gentlemen. And even criticise the award winning Benidorm. But I know not everyone can have my good taste.

[Undertoad]

Surely the best Blackadder episode is the third season one where Baldrick accidentally burns Johnson's Dictionary and they decide to write a new one.

E: Very well, sir, as you wish. Let's start at the beginning, shall we?
First: `A'. How would you define `a'?

B: Ohh...`a' (continues this in background)

G: Oh, I love this! I love this: quizzies...Errmmm, hang on, it's coming...
ooohh, crikey, errmm, oh yes, I've got it!

E: What?

G: Well, it doesn't really mean anything, does it?

E: Good. So we're well on the way, then. " `a'; impersonal pronoun;
doesn't really mean anything." Right! Next: `A'... `A-B'.

(Baldrick and Prince ponder over this)

B: Well, it's a buzzing thing, isn't it. "A buzzing thing."

E: Baldrick, I mean something that starts with `A-B'.

B: Honey? Honey starts with a bee.

G: He's right, you know, Blackadder. Honey does start a bee...and a flower,
too.

E: Yes, look, this really isn't getting anywhere. And besides, I've left out
`aardvark'.

G: Oh well, don't say we didn't give it a try.

E: No, Your Highness, it was a brave start, but I fear I must proceed on my
own. Now; Baldrick, go to the kitchen and make me something quick and sim-
ple to eat, would you? Two slices of bread with something in between.

B: What, like Gerald, Lord Sandwich, had the other day?

E: Yes -- a few rounds of Geralders.

[Clodfobble]

Yes, I can certainly believe that is the best Blackadder episode.

[monster]

UT is lying. That is all.

[Sundae]

For me the best episode is "Head", from the second series.
It could never read as well as it plays - you have to be able to hear Rowan Atkinson and Tim McInnerny to appreciate it in full. Aside - I have always maintained that the best comedy (ie what I like) can be listened to on the radio with little or no amendment. Frasier for example.

There are a number of scenes which delight me in this ep, but this is my favourite.
I still say, "We're not at home to Mr Cockup." But no-one gets what I mean

Percy is trying not to let Lady Farrow into the gaol because in fact they have already cut Lord Farrow's head off (to save time). Blackadder is about to try to impersonate Lord Farrow so that she doesn't find out.

Percy: Well, yes, there are a couple of other things.

Lady Farrow: I am prepared for the fact that he may have lost some weight.

Percy: Yes, and some height. That's the interesting thing, aaaah, you'll probably hardly recognise him at all actually.

Lady Farrow: You'll be telling me his arm's grown back next.

Percy: Aaaaaah, excuse just for a sec. [running back into the gaol]He's only got one arm!!!

MRP: Ah yes!

Blackadder: Oh well I shall just have to stick it inside the shirt. Which one? Which one?

Percy: Aaaaah, aaaaah, hang on! Em hang on! [back outside] Em, em, eh, how do we know you're his wife?

Lady Farrow: What?
Percy: Em, well, you know, you could be a gloater.

Lady Farrow: I beg pardon!?

Percy: You know, a gloater, aaaah, come to gloat over the condemned man! I mean we're up to our ears in gloaters here. "Can I come in for a gloat?" they shout and we shout back "Oh you heartless gloaters!"

Lady Farrow: (cries)

Percy: All right, all right, I tell you what. I'll believe you're not a gloater if you tell me which arm he hasn't got.

Lady Farrow: His left of course! Now let me see my husband!

Percy: [running back in] Right! it's the left. Good luck!

Blackadder: Gloaters. You really are a pratt aren't you Percy? Right, don't forget in two minutes you interrupt me all right? And no more than two minutes otherwise I'm in real trouble, and don't forget because..?

Baldrick: ...because we're not at home to Mr. Cockup!