Weird things that happen to you at work... - Page 8

SteveDallas · 06-26-2006, 11:27 PM

Well I don't know that this is weird. Just stupid.

I needed to order some telephones. So I dropped an email to our sales rep at a particular company and he ordered them for me. (We have a special corporate account with this company. For reasons that make no sense to me our special corporate price is sometimes much higher than the prices in this company's retail stores; when this happens, I have to complain to our sales rep and he manually places the order some way that gets around this problem--what a stupid arrangement. Don't get me started. But that was the deal with these phones.) These are pretty generic basic $25 speakerphones, suitable for placement in a lounge, hallway, or other public area where they may be subject to vandalism or theft.

When my 8 telephones arrived today, they turned out to be non-basic four-line phones with built-in answering machines. At $185 a pop.

I swear, some days I want to lock all my vendors in a room and see who comes out alive.

anonymous · 06-30-2006, 01:36 AM

So, you take a couple of days off work. Should be pretty simple, right? Not a chance.

Within 2 minutes of walking into the office on your first day back, the boss hands you a newspaper clipping without further comment. You recognize the style as that of the police reports of the local paper.

The article explains that one of your coworkers has been arrested for attempting to solicit sex with a minor on the internet. Of course, the 'minor' was actually an adult from one of those groups that goes out baiting traps for people stupid enough to try something like that.

Said coworker is about the last person on your list of people stupid enough to try something like that.

Said coworker is also about the last person on your list of people stupid enough to try something like that from a computer at work.

Spexxvet · 06-30-2006, 08:16 AM

Admit it - it was you, wasn't it, Anonymous.

SteveDallas · 10-26-2006, 03:33 PM

OK, not weird I guess. Just stupid.

I ask you, if you are a sales droid, and you're calling people to try to sell your stuff, how many times will you leave a voice mail with the same person, who NEVER returns your call, before you determine that maybe this person doesn't want to buy your product? (I admit it. We have caller ID. I always google outside numbers I don't recognize. This practice has cut the number of cold sales calls I answer waaaaay down.)

glatt · 10-26-2006, 03:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SteveDallas

I ask you, if you are a sales droid, and you're calling people to try to sell your stuff, how many times will you leave a voice mail with the same person, who NEVER returns your call, before you determine that maybe this person doesn't want to buy your product? (I admit it. We have caller ID. I always google outside numbers I don't recognize. This practice has cut the number of cold sales calls I answer waaaaay down.)

I NEVER answer an outside number I don't recognize, and I don't return calls when a cold calling sales droid leaves a message. Some of them have learned that calling the receptionist and being transferred can sometimes work, so now I don't answer calls from the receptionist. It sucks. I let her leave a message, and then I call her right back if it's actually her calling. I kind of shake my head in admiration at some of them. They don't give up.

Sheldonrs · 10-26-2006, 04:00 PM

I used to work for a software company that made screenwriting and story dev. software.
One day a guy came into our offices and asked me if i knew where he could find an attorney to take his case. He wanted to sue the writers and producers of the film "The Devil's Advocate" because he said they got the story from actual events in his own life.
That would mean he was the son of satan and an attorney.

SteveDallas · 10-26-2006, 11:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by glatt

. . . I don't return calls when a cold calling sales droid leaves a message.

I will if they're actually selling something I want to buy. It usually doesn't end happily (the last time I did this was when I was looking for a T1, and he told me if I had my network set up properly I really didn't need more than 5 IP addresses) but once in a while something interesting comes of it. My current nemeses are somebody with a training company, and one selling Nortel PBXs.

Quote:

Originally Posted by glatt

Some of them have learned that calling the receptionist and being transferred can sometimes work, so now I don't answer calls from the receptionist. It sucks.

On our system if the receptionist transfers the call and then lets it go I still get to see the caller ID of the outside caller. And they usually do this because they can tell it's a sales call and they don't feel an urge to stay on the line and say, "Hi Steve, Mr. Farkleston from Amalgamated Network Widgets is on the line."

Flint · 10-27-2006, 09:30 AM

...mmmmmmm...amalgamated network widgets....

wolf · 10-28-2006, 12:37 AM

Someone befouled the watercooler by pissing in it. He had removed the 5 gallon bottle first, and then decided that he was thirsty (or wanted more ammo for his gun) and drank directly from the nearly full bottle.

This was after he ripped two phones out of the wall and tore down all of the pictures and signage in the lobby, including the mission and vision statements, some artwork, and the EMTALA notice which is required by federal law to be posted at all times.

Sometimes it doesn't pay to tell a guy with Severe Chronic Obstructive Pulmonary Disease, "No, Mr. Johnson, you can't have a cigarette because if you smoke, you will die. You aren't allowed to die here."

Elspode · 10-28-2006, 12:40 AM

You should work in a looney bin, Wolf.

What?

You do?

Oh.

Scopulus Argentarius · 10-28-2006, 12:45 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by wolf

Someone befouled the watercooler

Interesting words chosen...Sounds very Victorian ...

Imagine all of your patients with polite accents and dry humor...

Griff · 10-28-2006, 07:56 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Scopulus Argentarius

Imagine all of your patients with polite accents and dry humor...

I'm saving this idea, seems useful.

Spexxvet · 10-28-2006, 09:32 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by wolf

Someone befouled the watercooler by pissing in it. He had removed the 5 gallon bottle first, and then decided that he was thirsty (or wanted more ammo for his gun) and drank directly from the nearly full bottle.

This was after he ripped two phones out of the wall and tore down all of the pictures and signage in the lobby, including the mission and vision statements, some artwork, and the EMTALA notice which is required by federal law to be posted at all times.

Sometimes it doesn't pay to tell a guy with Severe Chronic Obstructive Pulmonary Disease, "No, Mr. Johnson, you can't have a cigarette because if you smoke, you will die. You aren't allowed to die here."

A co-worker?

wolf · 10-28-2006, 12:14 PM

No, because the coworkers don't make a big deal of it when they piss in the water cooler.

morethanpretty · 11-09-2006, 01:09 PM

I cashiered last night and we were at a low point in business. One man came up bought coffee and wanted a double chocolate cookie.
Customer:"As if I'm not getting fat enough on all the chocolate I've been eating"
Me, "Chocolate's an aphrodesiac, so it can't be all bad"
Customer,"Well in that case I'll take the whole stack in case I get lucky other than with my hand."
Me: start to laugh, register what he just said, choke laugh, finish his transaction. "Thank you have a good night"
Customer: "Oh I will if what you say is true"

OMG WOW. I was so shocked that he would drop a comment like that to someone he's never seen before. He was atleast 10yrs older then me.

06-30-2006, 08:16 AM	#108
Spexxvet Makes some feel uncomfortable Join Date: Dec 2005 Posts: 10,346	Admit it - it was you, wasn't it, Anonymous. __________________ "I'm certainly free, nay compelled, to spread the gospel of Spex. " - xoxoxoBruce

10-26-2006, 04:00 PM	#111
Sheldonrs Master Dwellar Join Date: Oct 2006 Location: Los Angeles, CA Posts: 4,412	I used to work for a software company that made screenwriting and story dev. software. One day a guy came into our offices and asked me if i knew where he could find an attorney to take his case. He wanted to sue the writers and producers of the film "The Devil's Advocate" because he said they got the story from actual events in his own life. That would mean he was the son of satan and an attorney. __________________ Laugh and the world laughs with you; cry and the world laughs AT you. Last edited by Sheldonrs; 10-26-2006 at 04:22 PM.

10-27-2006, 09:30 AM	#113
Flint Snowflake Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: Dystopia Posts: 13,136	...mmmmmmm...amalgamated network widgets.... Attached Images __________________ **************** There's a level of facility that everyone needs to accomplish, and from there it's a matter of deciding for yourself how important ultra-facility is to your expression. ... I found, like Joseph Campbell said, if you just follow whatever gives you a little joy or excitement or awe, then you're on the right track. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Terry Bozzio**

10-28-2006, 12:37 AM	#114
wolf lobber of scimitars Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Phila Burbs Posts: 20,774	Someone befouled the watercooler by pissing in it. He had removed the 5 gallon bottle first, and then decided that he was thirsty (or wanted more ammo for his gun) and drank directly from the nearly full bottle. This was after he ripped two phones out of the wall and tore down all of the pictures and signage in the lobby, including the mission and vision statements, some artwork, and the EMTALA notice which is required by federal law to be posted at all times. Sometimes it doesn't pay to tell a guy with Severe Chronic Obstructive Pulmonary Disease, "No, Mr. Johnson, you can't have a cigarette because if you smoke, you will die. You aren't allowed to die here." __________________ wolf eht htiw og "Conspiracies are the norm, not the exception." --G. Edward Griffin The Creature from Jekyll Island High Priestess of the Church of the Whale Penis

10-28-2006, 12:40 AM	#115
Elspode When Do I Get Virtual Unreality? Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: Raytown, Missouri Posts: 12,719	You should work in a looney bin, Wolf. What? You do? Oh. __________________ "To those of you who are wearing ties, I think my dad would appreciate it if you took them off." - Robert Moog

06-26-2006, 11:27 PM	#106
SteveDallas Your Bartender Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: Philly Burbs, PA Posts: 7,651	Well I don't know that this is weird. Just stupid. I needed to order some telephones. So I dropped an email to our sales rep at a particular company and he ordered them for me. (We have a special corporate account with this company. For reasons that make no sense to me our special corporate price is sometimes much higher than the prices in this company's retail stores; when this happens, I have to complain to our sales rep and he manually places the order some way that gets around this problem--what a stupid arrangement. Don't get me started. But that was the deal with these phones.) These are pretty generic basic $25 speakerphones, suitable for placement in a lounge, hallway, or other public area where they may be subject to vandalism or theft. When my 8 telephones arrived today, they turned out to be non-basic four-line phones with built-in answering machines. At $185 a pop. I swear, some days I want to lock all my vendors in a room and see who comes out alive.

06-30-2006, 01:36 AM	#107
anonymous Operations Operative Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: in hiding Posts: 578	So, you take a couple of days off work. Should be pretty simple, right? Not a chance. Within 2 minutes of walking into the office on your first day back, the boss hands you a newspaper clipping without further comment. You recognize the style as that of the police reports of the local paper. The article explains that one of your coworkers has been arrested for attempting to solicit sex with a minor on the internet. Of course, the 'minor' was actually an adult from one of those groups that goes out baiting traps for people stupid enough to try something like that. Said coworker is about the last person on your list of people stupid enough to try something like that. Said coworker is also about the last person on your list of people stupid enough to try something like that from a computer at work.

10-26-2006, 03:33 PM	#109
SteveDallas Your Bartender Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: Philly Burbs, PA Posts: 7,651	OK, not weird I guess. Just stupid. I ask you, if you are a sales droid, and you're calling people to try to sell your stuff, how many times will you leave a voice mail with the same person, who NEVER returns your call, before you determine that maybe this person doesn't want to buy your product? (I admit it. We have caller ID. I always google outside numbers I don't recognize. This practice has cut the number of cold sales calls I answer waaaaay down.)

10-28-2006, 12:14 PM	#119
wolf lobber of scimitars Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Phila Burbs Posts: 20,774	No, because the coworkers don't make a big deal of it when they piss in the water cooler. __________________ wolf eht htiw og "Conspiracies are the norm, not the exception." --G. Edward Griffin The Creature from Jekyll Island High Priestess of the Church of the Whale Penis

11-09-2006, 01:09 PM	#120
morethanpretty Thats "Miss Zipper Neck" to you. Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: little town (but not the littlest) in texas Posts: 2,957	I cashiered last night and we were at a low point in business. One man came up bought coffee and wanted a double chocolate cookie. Customer:"As if I'm not getting fat enough on all the chocolate I've been eating" Me, "Chocolate's an aphrodesiac, so it can't be all bad" Customer,"Well in that case I'll take the whole stack in case I get lucky other than with my hand." Me: start to laugh, register what he just said, choke laugh, finish his transaction. "Thank you have a good night" Customer: "Oh I will if what you say is true" OMG WOW. I was so shocked that he would drop a comment like that to someone he's never seen before. He was atleast 10yrs older then me. __________________ Addicts may suck dick for coke, but love came up with the idea to put a dick in there to begin with. -Jack O'Brien

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