Why Can't Men Say the Things We Women Need to Hear?

[xoxoxoBruce]

Originally Posted by rkzenrage

My wife knows better... I refuse to let those bother me.
Once an apology has been accepted, the deed is dead, period, end of story.
If someone throws something up in my face that they have accepted an apology for it is a game and is to be treated as such, nothing more.

And what if you haven't apologized because you didn't even know it happened?
They remember every slight, real and imagined, and don't always say something at the time, but quietly slide it into their quiver.

[bluecuracao]

Originally Posted by xoxoxoBruce

They remember every slight, real and imagined, and don't always say something at the time, but quietly slide it into their quiver.

Very poetic...

[yesman065]

Just a quick question here - Why can't women hear what we actually say instead of what they think we said? I hate to be chauvinistic, and maybe its cause I've only had realationships with women since I'm straight, but it really bugs me when I say one thing and something completely different is heard.
Is it me, women, SO's in general or what?

[MsSparkie]

What we desired from a man:


*
I wanted to be cherished and adored.

*
I wanted to feel his strength and masculinity.

*
I wanted a great lover who loves to please me.

*
I wanted to feel respected.

*
I wanted to be gathered up in his strong arms.

*
I wanted him to tell me what he's feeling.

*
I wanted him to feel like I'm the best thing in his life.

*
I wanted him to love me with all his heart.


I just watched Brokeback Mountain and found it interesting. Didn't find any solutions. They acted like a normal hetro couple....same problems. LOL

It's like getting a dog or goldfish. You know what they can and cannot do. A man seems fairly limited, not as much as a goldfish maybe....but still....
Actually they may be more like a cat than a dog even.....aloof, never owned, taking what they need and not offering a lot in return.

NO, NOT EVERY MAN!!! I KNOW....I KNOW......

LOL

I believe they are only truly happy when out with guys doing guy stuff.

The rest is just a necessary evil to them, with maid service.

I apologize to any man here who is a loving, giving man.....very few and far between. JMHO.

Originally Posted by xoxoxoBruce

And what if you haven't apologized because you didn't even know it happened?
They remember every slight, real and imagined, and don't always say something at the time, but quietly slide it into their quiver.

Then it's not my problem.

[Undertoad]

I wanted to feel his strength and masculinity.

You wanted the romance novel man, but when he acted like a real man you ridiculed him and emasculated him.

Originally Posted by yesman065

Just a quick question here - Why can't women hear what we actually say instead of what they think we said? I hate to be chauvinistic, and maybe its cause I've only had realationships with women since I'm straight, but it really bugs me when I say one thing and something completely different is heard.
Is it me, women, SO's in general or what?

Man, I cannot tell you how many times I have said "... but what did I actually say? Because, what I actually said is what I mean, always. Putting words in my mouth pisses-me-OFF!" Does she hear it? What do you think?
I communicate and tell exactly how I feel... having it complicated and twisted is a game to me.
What I say is what I mean.
If I am going to lie, I would do it anyway... acting like everything I say is a lie is not going to trick it out of me. It is just going to make me not trust you & not want to say a damn thing to you, ever.
As for my wife, she has actually gotten a lot better recently... it has taken a long time. She still lapses though. If you don't trust him, why be with him? Don't get it.

[bbro]

Originally Posted by xoxoxoBruce

They remember every slight, real and imagined, and don't always say something at the time, but quietly slide it into their quiver.

I know for me, the reason that this happens is that I HATE confrontations. I try to have everyone like me, so if I am upset, I might just let it slide. Lately, I have been trying to let people know when they upset me - especially my BF. I think that the reason that things are brought up out of the blue is because even if you don't say anything, you might still think about it - especially if it is done over and over until you just can't take it anymore.

(That is probably just me though)

Then it does not slide... it lies in wait.

[MsSparkie]

Originally Posted by Undertoad

I wanted to feel his strength and masculinity.

You wanted the romance novel man, but when he acted like a real man you ridiculed him and emasculated him.

Yes. I did that with my last relationship. He took the brunt of my frustration with men, and I took the brunt of his frustration with women and life. He told me so.

Now we are both apart and too stubborn to make the move. So we will never meet again.

This one was for the gipper, I guess. We both have tried so hard with others, you just have to smash the glass sometimes and suffer the consequences.

He is on my mind every day. But he is the toughest son of a b*tch I've ever met and I'm not sure where his head is at these days.....I know he refuses to take his anti-depressents and it shows.

But you try to play it their way.....meet them in the ring....go a few rounds with them without being knocked out.....they get mad.

Then it's over.

You have to be the weak one, the fool. Then they have won. But once they win, they lose interest.

So what does a woman do with a strong macho man? I prefer them to others.....not a true bad boy, but a real man.

I do love men.

It seems it's a fool's game.

For now, I'm on the bench.

LOL

:-(

LOL

:-(


Golden.....I commisserate with you. I commisserate with him. There are 2 sides to every story. We just don't know how to play nicely together. Damn!

[Ibby]

Man, I've just decided "If y'can't beat 'em join 'em". I'm just as bad (or just as good at, depending on how you look at it) as my girlfriend at that whole twisting words thing and stuff. Its kinda funny that I act more like a girl than a guy when it comes to relationships, sometimes. I'm still whipped like you would not believe, though...

[MsSparkie]

I always said this: put estrogen in the water supply along with the flouride; soften up the men, stop wars.....if they grow breasts so be it, they can play with them.

[DucksNuts]

lol

[xoxoxoBruce]

Originally Posted by MsSparkie

What we desired from a man:
*
I wanted
*
I wanted
*
I wanted
*
I wanted
*
I wanted
*
I wanted
*
I wanted
*
I wanted

What did he want?

Originally Posted by MsSparkie

Yes. I did that with my last relationship. He took the brunt of my frustration with men, and I took the brunt of his frustration with women and life. He told me so.

Now we are both apart and too stubborn to make the move. So we will never meet again.

This one was for the gipper, I guess. We both have tried so hard with others, you just have to smash the glass sometimes and suffer the consequences.

He is on my mind every day. But he is the toughest son of a b*tch I've ever met and I'm not sure where his head is at these days.....I know he refuses to take his anti-depressents and it shows.

But you try to play it their way.....meet them in the ring....go a few rounds with them without being knocked out.....they get mad.

Then it's over.

You have to be the weak one, the fool. Then they have won. But once they win, they lose interest.

So what does a woman do with a strong macho man? I prefer them to others.....not a true bad boy, but a real man.

I do love men.

It seems it's a fool's game.

For now, I'm on the bench.

LOL

:-(

LOL

:-(


Golden.....I commisserate with you. I commisserate with him. There are 2 sides to every story. We just don't know how to play nicely together. Damn!

She has to be willing not to be let in.
Basically it is a relationship with a stranger.