Ask the Transperson - Page 4

DanaC · 01-14-2014, 05:01 AM

I must admit, I don't like the term cis (cismale, cisfolk, cisfemale).

Which I realise is a little like someone with an ickle spot on the face complaining like a muthafucka to someone with head to toe eczema....but still :P

Sundae · 01-14-2014, 12:42 PM

I don't like cis either.
I'm a woman.

Pamela is a woman because she identifies as such, except in threads like this where she discusses transgender issues in a way which I find very helpful. I've mentioned the transgender people I know because it's been germane to the conversation. I'd not bring it up if it wasn't.
Ibs never seemed to be 100% sure how she wanted to self-identify, but the last time she was around she was female, so that's how I remember her.

Mum still talks about some of the ladies she knew when she worked in the Ambulance Service as "the lesbians".
Such and such happened when she was on a certain shift with Sandra ("you know, one of the lesbians")

She's the same about the Asian family that live across the close. Bearing in mind that they're the Hussains she doesn't really need to add this in to conversation, but she does.
"Lovely family, the Hussains. Asians."

Then again she announces any calls I get from the Cellar by nationality.
"Someone called for you. American. Nice clear voice though."

infinite monkey · 01-14-2014, 12:56 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sundae

~snip~
Mum still talks about some of the ladies she knew when she worked in the Ambulance Service as "the lesbians".
Such and such happened when she was on a certain shift with Sandra ("you know, one of the lesbians")

~snip~

My mom used to give me messages like this: "Ummmmmmm...Scott called...IS HE THE GAY??!!" "Well, God, mom, I don't know if he's the gay...that's a lot of pressure on just one guy. He has to do the parade all by himself! 'I'm here! I'm queer!...I guess I'm the only one.' "

--Margaret Cho

Sundae · 01-14-2014, 12:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by infinite monkey

My mom used to give me messages like this: "Ummmmmmm...Scott called...IS HE THE GAY??!!" "Well, God, mom, I don't know if he's the gay...that's a lot of pressure on just one guy. He has to do the parade all by himself! 'I'm here! I'm queer!...I guess I'm the only one.'

--Margaret Cho

Big gay haggis.

Sheldonrs · 01-14-2014, 01:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sundae

Big gay haggis.

http://www.theguardian.com/world/200...ntology-prop-8

DanaC · 01-14-2014, 01:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sundae

Big gay haggis.

Always fun on Burn's night.

What?

limey · 01-14-2014, 12:46 PM

Me as well?

Sent by thought transference

Sundae · 01-14-2014, 12:57 PM

Sorry, Limey.
You are one of the main reasons she's more polite on the phone these days.
I have talked you up in terms of how sensible, responsible and accomplished you are. Which you are. But because she was brought up in a time when people like her knew their place, she's a little intimidated.

A couple of months back I had a call which turned out just to be a marketing call. But she stage-whispered to me, "I think it might be [Limey]".
She's stopped telling my callers to piss off.
I'd like to think it's in case it's you.

Or maybe she's just scared you won't take me off her hands once a year if she annoys you!

Pamela · 01-14-2014, 06:21 PM

Sundae, I identify as female too.

Trouble is, to most people, I am NOT just a girl because I say so. I'm that (insert derogatory slang term here). We tend to hang out in bunches when we go out for many reasons, protection is one of them. Many times, we are used as a joke or as comic relief. To a lot of men, we're just some kind of exotic treat for their oversexed libido. But we're rarely "just women" unless we have "passed" read: fooled them.

We have insider terms too. Our own language even. "cis" anything is simply a way to refer to anyone or anything that is not part of our world. It is not derogatory at all. I meant no offense.

Labels, however much we hate them, are an inevitable part of the human experience.

DanaC · 01-15-2014, 02:50 PM

Oh, Pam, I wasn't offended. I just dislike the term. I'm not in the least bit offended by someone using it about me.

I just think it's an ugly word/prefix. Kind of clinical and reductive (obviously - that's the point of labels :p). Truly though, I'm not sure there's a better word to use in a conversation that necessarily draws a distinction between the two different experiences of gender.

Pamela · 01-15-2014, 07:54 PM

Thanks Sheldon but I was thinking more like this:

limey · 01-17-2014, 01:05 PM

Is that relevant if she has displayed "cultural competence" (by which I understand, among other things, tolerance).

Sundae · 01-17-2014, 01:19 PM

Wolves are generally lean in the Winter.
Not sure about Wolfs.

Pamela · 01-18-2014, 09:18 PM

We do seem to cause conundrums and consternation no matter where we go.

So much fuss over a little thing like a penis that no one even SEES!

Pamela · 01-19-2014, 03:36 PM

Darnit, that video STILL didn't post right. Third time's the charm!

I must have posted the entire URL again.

01-14-2014, 12:42 PM	#2
Sundae polaroid of perfection Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: West Yorkshire Posts: 24,185	I don't like cis either. I'm a woman. Pamela is a woman because she identifies as such, except in threads like this where she discusses transgender issues in a way which I find very helpful. I've mentioned the transgender people I know because it's been germane to the conversation. I'd not bring it up if it wasn't. Ibs never seemed to be 100% sure how she wanted to self-identify, but the last time she was around she was female, so that's how I remember her. Mum still talks about some of the ladies she knew when she worked in the Ambulance Service as "the lesbians". Such and such happened when she was on a certain shift with Sandra ("you know, one of the lesbians") She's the same about the Asian family that live across the close. Bearing in mind that they're the Hussains she doesn't really need to add this in to conversation, but she does. "Lovely family, the Hussains. Asians." Then again she announces any calls I get from the Cellar by nationality. "Someone called for you. American. Nice clear voice though." __________________ Life's hard you know, so strike a pose on a Cadillac

01-14-2014, 12:46 PM	#7
limey Encroaching on your decrees Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: An island within the south-west coast of Scotland Posts: 7,016	Me as well? Sent by thought transference __________________ Living it up on the edge ... of civilisation, within the southwest coast of

01-14-2014, 12:57 PM	#8
Sundae polaroid of perfection Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: West Yorkshire Posts: 24,185	Sorry, Limey. You are one of the main reasons she's more polite on the phone these days. I have talked you up in terms of how sensible, responsible and accomplished you are. Which you are. But because she was brought up in a time when people like her knew their place, she's a little intimidated. A couple of months back I had a call which turned out just to be a marketing call. But she stage-whispered to me, "I think it might be [Limey]". She's stopped telling my callers to piss off. I'd like to think it's in case it's you. Or maybe she's just scared you won't take me off her hands once a year if she annoys you! __________________ Life's hard you know, so strike a pose on a Cadillac

01-17-2014, 01:05 PM	#12
limey Encroaching on your decrees Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: An island within the south-west coast of Scotland Posts: 7,016	Is that relevant if she has displayed "cultural competence" (by which I understand, among other things, tolerance). __________________ Living it up on the edge ... of civilisation, within the southwest coast of

01-17-2014, 01:19 PM	#13
Sundae polaroid of perfection Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: West Yorkshire Posts: 24,185	Wolves are generally lean in the Winter. Not sure about Wolfs. __________________ Life's hard you know, so strike a pose on a Cadillac

01-14-2014, 06:21 PM	#9
Pamela Deplorable Join Date: Oct 2013 Location: Dallas, TX Posts: 767	Sundae, I identify as female too. Trouble is, to most people, I am NOT just a girl because I say so. I'm that (insert derogatory slang term here). We tend to hang out in bunches when we go out for many reasons, protection is one of them. Many times, we are used as a joke or as comic relief. To a lot of men, we're just some kind of exotic treat for their oversexed libido. But we're rarely "just women" unless we have "passed" read: fooled them. We have insider terms too. Our own language even. "cis" anything is simply a way to refer to anyone or anything that is not part of our world. It is not derogatory at all. I meant no offense. Labels, however much we hate them, are an inevitable part of the human experience.

01-15-2014, 07:54 PM	#11
Pamela Deplorable Join Date: Oct 2013 Location: Dallas, TX Posts: 767	Thanks Sheldon but I was thinking more like this:

01-18-2014, 09:18 PM	#14
Pamela Deplorable Join Date: Oct 2013 Location: Dallas, TX Posts: 767	We do seem to cause conundrums and consternation no matter where we go. So much fuss over a little thing like a penis that no one even SEES!

01-19-2014, 03:36 PM	#15
Pamela Deplorable Join Date: Oct 2013 Location: Dallas, TX Posts: 767	Darnit, that video STILL didn't post right. Third time's the charm! I must have posted the entire URL again.

Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)