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Old 03-05-2014, 04:32 AM   #1
DanaC
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Stephen wright = comedy genius.

The ski lift story was always my favourite. And the one about burglars breaking into his house and replacing all his stuff with exact replicas.

And Izzard I always loved. Just what a guy.
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Old 03-05-2014, 08:21 AM   #2
infinite monkey
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I still use that line. As "Oh crap, someone broke into your house while you were gone and replaced everything with an exact replica!"

That or "everywhere is walking distance if you have the time." Or "you can't have everything. Where would you put it?"

Steven Wright reversed the peephole on his door. He said he could see people coming from miles away. "Who is it? Who is it going to be when you get here?"

Must've watched his stand up routine a hundred times.

Here are pages and pages of his jokes:

http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/au...en_wright.html

Excuse me while I go laugh for an hour or so!

Last edited by infinite monkey; 03-05-2014 at 10:06 AM. Reason: fixed name spelling
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Old 03-05-2014, 08:25 AM   #3
infinite monkey
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Last year I went fishing with Salvador Dali. He was using a dotted line. He caught every other fish.
--Steven Wright

Here's a good tagline: Is it weird in here, or is it just me?

Last edited by infinite monkey; 03-05-2014 at 10:06 AM. Reason: fixed name spelling
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Old 03-05-2014, 08:36 AM   #4
infinite monkey
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Here's a clip of emo from my old favorite show: Dr Katz Professional Therapist

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Old 03-05-2014, 08:49 AM   #5
glatt
 
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I loved Dr. Katz.
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Old 03-05-2014, 09:53 AM   #6
footfootfoot
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It's a small world but I wouldn't want to have to paint it.

Another great Steven Wright line
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Old 03-05-2014, 11:40 AM   #7
DanaC
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Oh I used to love Dr Katz!
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Old 03-24-2014, 01:49 PM   #8
glatt
 
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Mildly apprehensive, as it's half a world away, but Ebola outbreaks are back.
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Old 03-24-2014, 05:16 PM   #9
orthodoc
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Ebola is so virulent, it defeats itself (virally speaking). It kills too fast for it to propagate and really get out into the larger population. That's no comfort for those who succumb, I realize, but it isn't a big epidemic risk. If it became a little less virulent, we'd be in big trouble.
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Old 03-25-2014, 08:28 AM   #10
glatt
 
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Feel bad for the health care workers who are treating the fever patients before they realize it's Ebola, and wind up catching it themselves.
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Old 03-25-2014, 11:19 AM   #11
orthodoc
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Absolutely.
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Old 03-25-2014, 12:47 PM   #12
footfootfoot
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I'm battling a mild case of Ebola Zaire right now. Or possibly it's just the tail end of a cold.
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Old 04-01-2014, 10:47 PM   #13
Clodfobble
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Got some standardized test scores from the school today.

Minifobette is reading at a fourth grade level, and she can answer all sorts of comprehension questions about what she's read. But on the "listening" portion of the test, where they read an equivalent passage *out loud* and then ask similar comprehension questions, she's in the 20th percentile of Kindergarteners, effectively on a preschool level. It's like her ears don't work!

(Actually, what it's really like is the auditory processing portion of her brain doesn't work, which we pretty much already knew, but we didn't realize the discrepancy was quite so large.)
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Old 04-01-2014, 11:08 PM   #14
orthodoc
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If she's a visual learner, good for her. On the other hand, has her hearing been tested? Hearing deficits in kids can escape notice for a long time. If she hasn't had a formal hearing assessment, now is the time. She may hear certain frequencies very well but still have significant loss at speech frequencies. It's also possible that she may have trouble with speech discrimination. Children should have an audiologist test their hearing, to be sure that all relevant tests are done.

After all that, she may hear wonderfully but not process instructions. Before assuming that, however, it makes sense to check whether she isn't hearing the instructions in the first place.
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Old 04-02-2014, 07:26 AM   #15
monster
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