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Old 09-24-2015, 12:01 PM   #1
Undertoad
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Protip, if you don't have a tape measure, a spare USB cable and any yardstick/metrestick will do.

23 ½" / 59.5 cm (Large)
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Old 09-24-2015, 12:38 PM   #2
orthodoc
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Wow. Just measured and I got 22 1/4", which makes no sense at all in terms of that chart because I know I wear a bigger equestrian helmet than a 7 1/8. On the other hand, my head is long front-to-back. Hard to fit. So that probably explains it. My third son has the same thing, suffered agonies of anxiety in middle school thinking he had a deformed head (he's anxious by nature). All right, this is embarrassing; move along, nothing to see here. Lightbulb head is all.
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Old 09-24-2015, 02:19 PM   #3
Clodfobble
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sundae
I mean, have you ever known a woman who measured her snatch?
Measured, no. But I know I have a larger than average cooter. I also have a stronger than average cooter, though, so I choose to believe it works out in the end.
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Old 09-24-2015, 02:28 PM   #4
limey
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Clodfobble View Post
Measured, no. But I know I have a larger than average cooter. I also have a stronger than average cooter, though, so I choose to believe it works out in the end.
Oh Clod! That's set all of the minds of the Cellarmen racing!
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Old 09-24-2015, 02:31 PM   #5
Undertoad
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Wull wait, howdya -

and howdya --

--

and wait, wait, howdya know what AVERAGE is?!?
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Old 09-24-2015, 02:42 PM   #6
Clodfobble
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Here is what I know:

1.) More than one partner (in the politest of honest-sharing contexts) has admitted that I am, at the very least, the largest they have been with. And I have been with the same person since I was 19, so it's not like this is a post-baby development (and mine didn't come out that direction anyway.)

2.) The sex toys that I find ideal are what the internet refers to as "super extra large." Regular ones are... meh.

3.) Tampons fall out of me. Not right away, but you're supposed to have to pull those fuckers out, not shove them back in repeatedly. I just recently discovered extra large ones online--not extra absorbent, mind you, just a little wider than normal. They are not directly advertised precisely as such, but the discreetly-worded positive reviews did not lead me astray.
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Old 09-24-2015, 02:58 PM   #7
Gravdigr
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Clod's...stronger than...oval-headed...


I can't concentrate for shit right now...
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Old 09-29-2015, 10:05 PM   #8
Elspode
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Clodfobble View Post
Here is what I know:

1.) More than one partner (in the politest of honest-sharing contexts) has admitted that I am, at the very least, the largest they have been with. And I have been with the same person since I was 19, so it's not like this is a post-baby development (and mine didn't come out that direction anyway.)

2.) The sex toys that I find ideal are what the internet refers to as "super extra large." Regular ones are... meh.

3.) Tampons fall out of me. Not right away, but you're supposed to have to pull those fuckers out, not shove them back in repeatedly. I just recently discovered extra large ones online--not extra absorbent, mind you, just a little wider than normal. They are not directly advertised precisely as such, but the discreetly-worded positive reviews did not lead me astray.

I gotta say that this is pretty frigging honest. And yes...there *is* a huge difference in the capacity of various females anatomy. I've been with women who could have easily started a vaginal spelunking business, all the way to women for whom I thought I was going to need to find something conical to even get started.
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Old 09-24-2015, 06:53 PM   #9
monster
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sounds like you could accommodate a large helmet
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Old 09-24-2015, 10:46 PM   #10
sexobon
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Maybe some Dark Helmet.

Name:  Dark Helmet.jpg
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Old 09-25-2015, 11:23 AM   #11
Gravdigr
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I'm still thinking about Clod's "stronger than average cooter"...


Mr. Clod is a lucky man...Urrbody wants a girl with a stout coochie.


"Son, here's the secret to a happy life: Find yourself a girl who can pick up a full magnum of champagne with her twitchit, and marry that girl."
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Old 09-26-2015, 02:49 AM   #12
limey
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Gravdigr View Post
I'm still thinking about Clod's "stronger than average cooter"...


Mr. Clod is a lucky man...Urrbody wants a girl with a stout coochie.


"Son, here's the secret to a happy life: Find yourself a girl who can pick up a full magnum of champagne with her twitchit, and marry that girl."
I genuinely lol'd. For quite some time.

Sent by thought transference
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Old 09-25-2015, 06:03 PM   #13
Clodfobble
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Rest assured, he puts up with plenty of other crap in exchange.
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Old 09-26-2015, 10:50 AM   #14
BigV
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That's the end of the list, then. I guess EVERYthing really is bigger in Texas.
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Old 09-26-2015, 12:44 PM   #15
Clodfobble
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Just goes to prove that guys aren't actually all that picky. "Hot dog in a hallway" is almost as common an insult category as the "pencil dick" theme, but admit you have one and all of a sudden it's, "oh my god that's so hot."

What guy says, "Actually, my penis is really small," and all the women start fawning? Doesn't happen. All a woman has to do is begin to describe their body--in whatever terms they want--and the men immediately respond that it just so happens to be their favorite kind.
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