One for Lookout123: Win by more than 5 points = you lose - Page 3

Undertoad · 06-15-2010, 08:13 AM

This story falls along class boundaries, working class versus upper-middle class, not political boundaries.

classicman · 06-15-2010, 08:36 AM

My kids are older now, but I remember when they were young and were involved in competitive team sports. They played in both rec and travel sports when they earned it. Sometimes they didn't.

The recreational sports like the YMCA had already been converted to the everyone is a winner mentality. That was ok though, cuz those leagues were for anyone to join, learn and participate in a sport for the first time or many times.

However, the teams where the play is competitive and the players have to earn the privilege of playing were still pretty sound. Unfortunately this mentality had begun to permeate the league, at least here locally. I recall a team meeting where a couple parents were upset that their child was not getting as much time nor playing the position they wanted them to as much as a couple other players. They actually wanted each kid to play every position and play equal amounts of time each game. In a rec league thats fine, but not in a travel environment.

Their kids were not very good and played in EVERY GAME no matter what the score. If we were ahead more, they played more. If not, then not as much. We fielded a pretty good team and most all the boys ended up as friends - right through high school.

After the games we tried to do something as a group regardless of winning or losing. Pizza, ice cream... As a group we would review the game - the good the bad & the ugly. Then we were done with it. The kids enjoyed it and were well aware of the scores whether they won or lost. They also knew that there was a bigger picture - the playoffs and bragging rights. The short term goals and long term goals were intertwined. I think that is a great life lesson.

These kids knew when they got their asses handed to them that they typically were beaten by a better team and looked forward to trying again next time. Rivalries were created between teams and bonds were built between players. It was good for all of them.

monster · 06-15-2010, 10:52 AM

Maybe we should look at it as payback for when they dumbed down academics so the jocks could get into college?

lookout123 · 06-15-2010, 12:14 PM

Lil Lookout's new club naturally fits in with the way I view sports.

1) After every practice each kid gets a written report card based on objective guidelines. That report card will determine what happens with their playing time. They are just kids so a single bad practice doesn't mean anything but the trends and patterns do. I know one parent who left the club last year because their child didn't get their "fair share" of playing time. Of course, that kid is a spoiled little shit who refuses to take direction and doesn't feel the need to work as a part of a team. Funny that, actions and attitudes have consequences.

2) Every kid has a homework assignment for the week (watch a specific game, player, event or read a specific book). If the kid doesn't do it their playing time is going to be decreased.

3) While the team and coach show up to win every single game, a loss doesn't matter if the kids learn something along the way. I've seen this coach sub out the kid who just scored because he should have passed. I've seen this coach stop two of his players during a game to explain why what they are doing isn't working. Winning is important but not nearly as important as how you play the game.

4) Parents have to sign contracts detailing expected behavior. Parents cheer for the TEAM and will never ever direct the players to shoot, pass, run, etc. I know a family who was removed from the team. There were multiple attempts to change habits but in the end they sat the whole family down and told the boy how much they enjoyed him as a person and a player and explained that while his play was excellent he was being removed from the team because his mother refused to follow the guidelines she had agreed to. They wished him the best of luck and refunded his remaining training fees.

We should teach our kids how to always strive for the win and how to gracefully accept defeat when their best efforts just aren't good enough. Sports are more than just a game, they are a learning opportunity. Actions and attitudes have consequences.

classicman · 06-15-2010, 01:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by lookout123

We should teach our kids how to always strive for the win and how to gracefully accept defeat when their best efforts just aren't good enough. Sports are more than just a game, they are a learning opportunity. Actions and attitudes have consequences.

Excellent

lookout123 · 06-16-2010, 02:32 PM

The Spain v Switzerland game today showed EXACTLY what so many parents don't get about the games their kids play. Spain is a FAR superior team with better players pretty much across the board. I don't know anyone who honestly thought the Swiss would beat them. The Swiss players could have bitched and moaned about their awful luck in having to face the european champions and just played not to lose. Instead they went out, gave it everything they had, played to their strengths and walked away with all 3 points.

The better team lost because the less talented team played the game. Even if they'd lost they'd have been able to walk away knowing they had done their best against arguably the most talented team in the world.

Great job!

06-15-2010, 08:36 AM	#2
classicman barely disguised asshole, keeper of all that is holy. Join Date: Nov 2007 Posts: 23,401	My kids are older now, but I remember when they were young and were involved in competitive team sports. They played in both rec and travel sports when they earned it. Sometimes they didn't. The recreational sports like the YMCA had already been converted to the everyone is a winner mentality. That was ok though, cuz those leagues were for anyone to join, learn and participate in a sport for the first time or many times. However, the teams where the play is competitive and the players have to earn the privilege of playing were still pretty sound. Unfortunately this mentality had begun to permeate the league, at least here locally. I recall a team meeting where a couple parents were upset that their child was not getting as much time nor playing the position they wanted them to as much as a couple other players. They actually wanted each kid to play every position and play equal amounts of time each game. In a rec league thats fine, but not in a travel environment. Their kids were not very good and played in EVERY GAME no matter what the score. If we were ahead more, they played more. If not, then not as much. We fielded a pretty good team and most all the boys ended up as friends - right through high school. After the games we tried to do something as a group regardless of winning or losing. Pizza, ice cream... As a group we would review the game - the good the bad & the ugly. Then we were done with it. The kids enjoyed it and were well aware of the scores whether they won or lost. They also knew that there was a bigger picture - the playoffs and bragging rights. The short term goals and long term goals were intertwined. I think that is a great life lesson. These kids knew when they got their asses handed to them that they typically were beaten by a better team and looked forward to trying again next time. Rivalries were created between teams and bonds were built between players. It was good for all of them. __________________ "like strapping a pillow on a bull in a china shop" Bullitt

06-15-2010, 10:52 AM	#3
monster I hear them call the tide Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Perpetual Chaos Posts: 30,852	Maybe we should look at it as payback for when they dumbed down academics so the jocks could get into college? __________________ The most difficult thing is the decision to act, the rest is merely tenacity Amelia Earhart

06-15-2010, 12:14 PM	#4
lookout123 changed his status to single Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: Right behind you. No, the other side. Posts: 10,308	Lil Lookout's new club naturally fits in with the way I view sports. 1) After every practice each kid gets a written report card based on objective guidelines. That report card will determine what happens with their playing time. They are just kids so a single bad practice doesn't mean anything but the trends and patterns do. I know one parent who left the club last year because their child didn't get their "fair share" of playing time. Of course, that kid is a spoiled little shit who refuses to take direction and doesn't feel the need to work as a part of a team. Funny that, actions and attitudes have consequences. 2) Every kid has a homework assignment for the week (watch a specific game, player, event or read a specific book). If the kid doesn't do it their playing time is going to be decreased. 3) While the team and coach show up to win every single game, a loss doesn't matter if the kids learn something along the way. I've seen this coach sub out the kid who just scored because he should have passed. I've seen this coach stop two of his players during a game to explain why what they are doing isn't working. Winning is important but not nearly as important as how you play the game. 4) Parents have to sign contracts detailing expected behavior. Parents cheer for the TEAM and will never ever direct the players to shoot, pass, run, etc. I know a family who was removed from the team. There were multiple attempts to change habits but in the end they sat the whole family down and told the boy how much they enjoyed him as a person and a player and explained that while his play was excellent he was being removed from the team because his mother refused to follow the guidelines she had agreed to. They wished him the best of luck and refunded his remaining training fees. We should teach our kids how to always strive for the win and how to gracefully accept defeat when their best efforts just aren't good enough. Sports are more than just a game, they are a learning opportunity. Actions and attitudes have consequences. __________________ Getting knocked down is no sin, it's not getting back up that's the sin

06-16-2010, 02:32 PM	#6
lookout123 changed his status to single Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: Right behind you. No, the other side. Posts: 10,308	The Spain v Switzerland game today showed EXACTLY what so many parents don't get about the games their kids play. Spain is a FAR superior team with better players pretty much across the board. I don't know anyone who honestly thought the Swiss would beat them. The Swiss players could have bitched and moaned about their awful luck in having to face the european champions and just played not to lose. Instead they went out, gave it everything they had, played to their strengths and walked away with all 3 points. The better team lost because the less talented team played the game. Even if they'd lost they'd have been able to walk away knowing they had done their best against arguably the most talented team in the world. Great job! __________________ Getting knocked down is no sin, it's not getting back up that's the sin

06-15-2010, 08:13 AM	#1
Undertoad Radical Centrist Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: Cottage of Prussia Posts: 31,423	This story falls along class boundaries, working class versus upper-middle class, not political boundaries.

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