Kid's sports - A New Hope

[lookout123]

A few of action shots. Sorry about the sizing. still trying to figure that out.

[xoxoxoBruce]

Excellent, congratulations to the kids... and their coach.

[lookout123]

I'd like to point out the obvious - Lil Lookout is just a small part of the team, but it would not be kosher to go into great detail and drop pictures of other children on the webz. He is not treated as the star on the field.

[lookout123]

Last night Mrs L went to a wedding and reception while I stayed home with the kids. It broke my heart, but... ah, nevermind - I don't like the bride so I stayed home. She took one of her girlfriends. Why is this news worthy of this thread? Because the girlfriend just told me about the dinner conversation Mrs L had. She is generally very anti-conflict and diplomatic so it's pretty unusual for her.

Male guest: My wife tells me your kid plays soccer?

Mrs L: Yes, he plays for ____soccerclub.

Male guest: Cool. Is he any good?

Mrs L: He seems to be. He really loves the game.

Male guest: Well if he's any good you should bring him over to my club. I own ______ soccer academy. I've been coaching for ten years and I only hire the best coaches. I've thought about buying your club, but the price just isn't right.

Mrs L: Our club is a non-profit organization.

Male guest: You know what I mean. You really should bring him over to work with some real coaches.

Mrs L: Thanks, but we're pretty happy with our club. The kids really are great friends and all the parents get along very well.

Male guest: That's nice, but the club isn't that great at developing players. We have the best coaches in the western US. Many of them have played professionally overseas. In fact, your club has asked me to take over training duties because they don't really have any qualified coaches.

Mrs L: We really do like our club and besides we've seen some ugly incidents with your club's coaches. In the age group over us, the team was ejected from a tournament because the coaches verbally assaulted the referees.

Male guest: That's not how it happened. The referees just didn't like our team winning.

Mrs L: I was at that game. I know exactly what happened. Your team wasn't winning. Besides, we really work on good sportsmanship above all and I've seen your players throw some pretty dirty moves on the field. I wouldn't want lil lookout associated with that.

Male guest: We teach our kids proper physical soccer. You've probably just heard the completely ridiculous story from when two of our teams played and one of your kids wasn't big enough to take a physical challenge - he hurt his knee a little is all. My son is the one involved so I know it was blown out of proportion.

Mrs L: Your player got beat and slid in from behind after grabbing our player's shirt and then drove his knee straight into our kid so his knee buckled. It really could have been ugly. Our player limped for several weeks and there were concerns about ligament damage. Your parents mocked him from the sidelines because he cried.

Male guest: That's just not true. The kid from your team pretended he got hurt to win a free kick. Your coach was completely unprofessional in his handling of it. A proper coach would have explained to the parents that sometimes games get physical. A proper coach would have taught his players how to win a physical game. A proper coach would pick bigger players for his team so he didn't have to worry about stuff like that. You really should move your kid over to our club before he falls any further behind in his development.

Mrs L: Actually I don't think that would work.

Male guest: Why?

Mrs L: Because you're a walking fuckstick. I'd urge my kid to take up ballet before I let him associate with the assholes and idiots at your club. I've watched our team beat yours every time they've met. MY kid is the one who got hurt on the field that day because YOUR kid was taught to play dirty. My kid personally lit your team up for two goals and a couple assists on the way to our 6-0 win. My kid is the one who had to ask me what a pussy was because one of your parents called him one for crying while he was down on the ground. I know this because I was there, standing next to my husband who happens to be the coach. So how about you go get another drink and leave me the fuck alone?

Apparently there were a few gasps and chuckles but that pretty much ended it. That guy really is a douche. His primary coaching technique is screaming until he is in danger of blowing blood vessels at which point he throws his clipboard and storms off.

[Sundae]

First, congrats on the win, and great pics.
Second, congrats on the win because it's so obvious it's not all about that - for you, your family and the team.
Thirdly, congrats on your wife. You were right to fight for her.

Well done all round, and may the asshats of the world realise what teamwork means when they come up against it.

[classicman]

Ahhh Lookout - the fond memories your stories bring back. Absolutely spectacular. Gotta love it. Mrs. Lookout also rocks.

[xoxoxoBruce]

[LabRat]

Heh. I love it. Excellent job, Mrs. L. Excellent!

[Treasenuak]

WOOHOO Mrs. L! Way to tell the asshat. Congrats, Lookout, for a great season, and a great job coaching. You n my dad would get along great; he coached my lil bro for nearly ten years and has the exact same outlook on the game: TEAMWORK. So having sat through several games where kids were pushed for GOALS and selfish playing and very PHYSICAL playing, I have to give you kudos for being one of the GOOD coaches Way to go!

[Kingswood]

It is appropriate that the thread is titled "A New Hope" because it sounds like Mrs Lookout just found the thermal exhaust port.

[lookout123]

We just got back from a week in the arctic north. Lil Lookout missed one game. Being the cocky little bastard he is, he was convinced the team would suffer without him.

As it turned out the team had to play missing him, Ba, and Br. Essentially two of the more creative players and the best defender. Lil Lookout was in agony over how his poor team would do without them. I think he was in greater agony when I let him know his team won 13-0 without him, Ba, and Br.

S scored a hattrick. (possibly the only goals he will score in his life)
K scored 4
Bi scored 3 and had a few assists.

The boys stepped up and stuck together as a team. As luck would have it they were playing a team having some issues, but that doesn't negate the fact they still had to play without 3 of the 7 starters.

Well done boys. And to LL, Br, and Ba... I found these three chips egos on the floor, might they belong to you?

[Juniper]

Congratulations, Lookout and family, for being such great sports parents and teaching good sportsmanship.

My kids are big sports participants too -- son plays baseball and wrestles, daughter does all-star cheer, basketball sidelines cheer and spent 3 years in competitive gymnastics. So I've seen the good, bad, and ugly, boy have I.

We've been so lucky to get involved with organizations and coaches that teach good sportsmanship and are more concerned with the kids' emotional health than with winning. That's not to say they don't push the kids to do their best and enjoy winning! It's a difficult balance.

Last summer my son's baseball team (minors - 9 year old boys) against a team whose parents were horribly obnoxious. They had spent WAY too much time making up signs and all kinds of "spirit" doodads (I've seen less at pro games), and the whole game they made noise to distract our players and called them foul names.

Our coach called a huddle for all of us and said "We can't stop them from doing this, but we can show them how a real team behaves." He urged us not to rise to their bait and do what they were doing in retaliation. We didn't.

Our team lost (came in 3rd, in the league) but we still felt like winners.

At Sunday's cheer competition, my daughter's team got 3rd place again. (um...out of 3) She tells me that, anticipating not coming in first, she urged her teammates to cheer for the winning team anyway. Some of them did, and she tells me they were the only people who did so. In the YMCA gymnastics league, that is what they were expected to do, and it's also what she was taught by last year's school team (though it's easier when you're always getting 1st place!) She approached one of them on the way out of the arena - I was with her - and said "Good job, you guys were really awesome today!" The girl looked at her like she had two heads, but then out popped a big grin and she said "thanks."

I know this sound sappy, but we're teaching our kids more than how to compete - we're giving them big hearts, too.

[lookout123]

We had another fun tournament this weekend. It is an annual tournament for charity - the registration fees are barely enough to cover the expenses but every player and coach is required to bring a $10+ toy donation. We're talking approximately 2,000 participants, so pretty awesome. Good fun for a good cause.

Our team is having some behind the scenes issues that I've been trying to stay out of and pretend I'm ignorant of and it isn't really working. HC is a friend and someone I really like. He is an excellent trainer. These kids and the game are his passion - his girlfriends always go away after realizing they will always come in second if the choice is between them and the kids. That being said, he has some blindspots when it comes to player development and team chemistry. That's ok, those happen to be the areas I really excel in. We're a good team. Except during times like this. For the last three weeks he has blown off my thoughts on the team and players because he has a mental image of what is. Unfortunately, he doesn't adjust his image to align with current realities. That means some players he has defined as stars are given too much while those that he feels are "role players" are left to pick up the pieces. Example: Lil Lookout is his star outside shooter and creative force on the right. Therefore Lil Lookout will play every minute possible and other players only sub in long enough to give him a breather. I love Lil Lookout like a son:: but the boy is off the boil. His shots are still amazing but his workrate is down, his attitude is poor, and his confidence is shot. Br should be playing that spot instead of LL right now. There are a couple other examples but this sums it up.

OK, so team chemistry is suffering because the coaches are having a difference of opinion. Unacceptable. I have chosen to back off a bit and while I'm still there and doing my bit I've become less vocal. I figure HC will work through whatever is going on and when he's ready we'll pick up where we left off. The problem is that some of the parents have been rumbling for awhile that they want me as the HC and want him as the lead trainer. I avoided the topic and played deaf. A couple parents approached me off the record and I told them absolutely not. This is HIS team. He created the club. He gathered these kids. He makes career choices around how it will affect the teams he coaches. I will not step up and help strip him of his role simply because things are a little rocky right now. That was the end of the story for me.

Apparently someone quietly asked him to step back this weekend and watch how I handled the games in his absence. No one told me this though. Effectively the first two games of the tournament were completely blown because of poor coaching. I didn't realize until ten minutes into the first game that he wanted me to be the coach. FUCK. OK, so now I start directing the kids in the way they play for me. But then he starts calling subs. We use players differently so his instruction didn't match with what the other players were doing. Complete screw up. Same thing for the second game. I can coach, I can sit in the back and support, but I can't do half and half. The kids get confused and things just don't go well. We tied both games so were effectively out of the running but we still had another day to go.

Day two rolls around and Lil Lookout wakes up with a 103 temp and allergy/asthma issues. I leave him with Mrs L and go to the game to find out HC won't be there. OK, fine. the kids played great and we ran out 8-0 winners. 5 players scored with a hattrick from Br in that right side creative role.

Lil Lookout got his issues sorted and was able to make the afternoon game. So was HC. Again he hung in the back allowing me to coach... but would randomly start shouting instructions that would send a player off on a different mission. Eh, whatever - we won 2-1 with wonder strikes from Lil Lookout and K.

The kids played very well as individuals all weekend long but the chemistry and teamwork that is their trademark was missing in all four games. Sadly in preparing this after tournament post I couldn't think of any really excellent stretches of play worth reporting. Great individual performances but no unit cohesion.

All in all the kids had fun but there is an underlying tension at work amongst the adults right now. This too shall pass, just kind of a disappointing weekend.

[ZenGum]

Joint command almost never works. You and he should sort this out between you.

[lookout123]

It is sorted. He is in command. I know it, accept it, and embrace it. I'm just the support. For whatever reason he doesn't want/need the support I give to the degree I did before. Cool. I will be here to do what I'm asked when/if I'm asked.

He's being a little schizo right now and he'll work through it. I'll just be more on my toes to ensure it doesn't affect the kids in the future.