Teenagers, popularity, and smarts - Page 2

piercehawkeye45 · 04-30-2010, 02:53 PM

I don't really buy into the idea that American children view being smart as uncool. There are too many exceptions and I feel the author of the article Cloud posted is making excuses and blaming others for his or her probable lack of confidence and social skills in high school and junior high. From the stories here and from most other places, I feel that my high school experience was similar to most others that the popular kids always had some reason to be more confident over the unpopular kids. Whether it was being better looking, more socially or physically mature, or having success in sports, the popular kids usually had something going for them that was deemed important by their peers at that time. I think this concept has applied to my social life at college and beyond as well. The most popular people in any subgroup have qualities that are deemed important by that particular subgroup. Some people will naturally fill those qualities, some people will figure those qualities out and purposely fill them, and others will not figure them out and face the consequences of that, unpopularity. I did not figure that out in high school, even with being a co-football captain my senior year, so I did not enjoy great popularity either.

Though with respect to intelligence, I believe the opposite is true. I believe that, for the most part, people are attracted to intelligence. It is just that there are so many other factors with attraction, it is difficult to isolate the trait. As mentioned by many here and in the article, intelligence (school wise) in high school is worthless and meaningless. Teenagers know this. That is why it was never deemed a positive quality for teenagers. Then, along with the fact that many intelligent high schoolers, at least school smarts wise, are socially awkward, immature, and lack confidence, the intelligence to unpopularity link was made and solidified.

xoxoxoBruce · 04-30-2010, 03:08 PM

I think you got it, pierce.

Shawnee123 · 04-30-2010, 03:32 PM

I don't get it.

I know lots of people who were smart AND popular AND nice AND excelled in some sport or something or another.

My memory is that things weren't THAT divided, but I pretty much got along with everyone (yeah, believe it.)

I'm very surprised for how many people it was one way or the other.

lumberjim · 04-30-2010, 04:43 PM

I just met a nerd that is a partner at a big accounting firm. he put 250K on his application.... that salesman said he wasn't really sure how much he makes. Apparently, he gives his bills to the firm, they pay them, and subtract them from his quarterly bonus. Seemed like a nice enough guy, but I could tell he'd spent some time un-taping his butt cheeks in his youth.

Cloud · 04-30-2010, 04:47 PM

as a smart outsider, I certainly did NOT wish to be popular. Still don't.

As I said, I don't totally agree with all the points about nerds and popularity, but I do agree that teenagers are given too much leisure time and to much freedom. It gets them in trouble.

I was thinking recently this might be why we are so hardwired for war--it gives the young men something semi-constructive to do. If they survive--great! they can then procreate.

skysidhe · 05-01-2010, 11:13 AM

Good points Peirce. I think popularity is highly overrated these days.

I think people stress popularity at times when they should be stressing the importance of being a good person and having an all inclusive attitude.

04-30-2010, 02:53 PM	#16
piercehawkeye45 Franklin Pierce Join Date: Oct 2006 Location: Minnesota Posts: 3,695	I don't really buy into the idea that American children view being smart as uncool. There are too many exceptions and I feel the author of the article Cloud posted is making excuses and blaming others for his or her probable lack of confidence and social skills in high school and junior high. From the stories here and from most other places, I feel that my high school experience was similar to most others that the popular kids always had some reason to be more confident over the unpopular kids. Whether it was being better looking, more socially or physically mature, or having success in sports, the popular kids usually had something going for them that was deemed important by their peers at that time. I think this concept has applied to my social life at college and beyond as well. The most popular people in any subgroup have qualities that are deemed important by that particular subgroup. Some people will naturally fill those qualities, some people will figure those qualities out and purposely fill them, and others will not figure them out and face the consequences of that, unpopularity. I did not figure that out in high school, even with being a co-football captain my senior year, so I did not enjoy great popularity either. Though with respect to intelligence, I believe the opposite is true. I believe that, for the most part, people are attracted to intelligence. It is just that there are so many other factors with attraction, it is difficult to isolate the trait. As mentioned by many here and in the article, intelligence (school wise) in high school is worthless and meaningless. Teenagers know this. That is why it was never deemed a positive quality for teenagers. Then, along with the fact that many intelligent high schoolers, at least school smarts wise, are socially awkward, immature, and lack confidence, the intelligence to unpopularity link was made and solidified. __________________ I like my perspectives like I like my baseball caps: one size fits all.

04-30-2010, 03:08 PM	#17
xoxoxoBruce The future is unwritten Join Date: Oct 2002 Posts: 71,105	I think you got it, pierce. __________________ The descent of man ~ Nixon, Friedman, Reagan, Trump.

04-30-2010, 03:32 PM	#18
Shawnee123 Why, you're a regular Alfred E Einstein, ain't ya? Join Date: Jun 2006 Posts: 21,206	I don't get it. I know lots of people who were smart AND popular AND nice AND excelled in some sport or something or another. My memory is that things weren't THAT divided, but I pretty much got along with everyone (yeah, believe it.) I'm very surprised for how many people it was one way or the other. __________________ A word to the wise ain't necessary - it's the stupid ones who need the advice. --Bill Cosby

04-30-2010, 04:43 PM	#19
lumberjim I can hear my ears Join Date: Oct 2003 Posts: 25,571	I just met a nerd that is a partner at a big accounting firm. he put 250K on his application.... that salesman said he wasn't really sure how much he makes. Apparently, he gives his bills to the firm, they pay them, and subtract them from his quarterly bonus. Seemed like a nice enough guy, but I could tell he'd spent some time un-taping his butt cheeks in his youth. __________________ This body holding me reminds me of my own mortality Embrace this moment, remember We are eternal, all this pain is an illusion ~MJKeenan

04-30-2010, 04:47 PM	#20
Cloud ... Join Date: Feb 2007 Posts: 8,360	as a smart outsider, I certainly did NOT wish to be popular. Still don't. As I said, I don't totally agree with all the points about nerds and popularity, but I do agree that teenagers are given too much leisure time and to much freedom. It gets them in trouble. I was thinking recently this might be why we are so hardwired for war--it gives the young men something semi-constructive to do. If they survive--great! they can then procreate. __________________ "Guard your honor. Let your reputation fall where it will. And outlive the bastards!"

05-01-2010, 11:13 AM	#21
skysidhe ~~Life is either a daring adventure or nothing.~~ Join Date: Apr 2006 Posts: 6,828	Good points Peirce. I think popularity is highly overrated these days. I think people stress popularity at times when they should be stressing the importance of being a good person and having an all inclusive attitude.

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