Birthday Party Abandonment - Page 2

infinite monkey · 01-29-2012, 12:53 AM

If you've planned a party for kids, you expect non-military behavior. It's not that hard!

Wow, the generation beyond 'helicopter parents' is 'gestapo parents'.

I'm frightened.

Flint · 01-29-2012, 12:55 AM

I'm just saying, if you leave your kid here, expecting me to "parent them" for several hours, they get parented by MY house rules.

infinite monkey · 01-29-2012, 12:58 AM

Oh, absolutely.

I was thinking how my younger brother's girls know how to be gracious, and to not be jerks.

Kids need to know the etiquette, and too many parents don't teach them.

A rambunctious kid is awesome. A rude kid is tiresome.

Aliantha · 01-29-2012, 01:23 AM

I'm with Flint more or less. If kids are at my house unaccompanied, I'm going to treat them the same way I treat my own kids. If they don't like it, they don't come back. Most of them seem to keep coming though, so it can't be all bad. lol

eta: and even if their parents are there, if they break my rules I'll be letting them know.

Sundae · 01-29-2012, 06:00 AM

If Flint meant what Ali said, then I'm with it too.
I was chastised at many parties - I was an excitable and hyper little girl.

I managed to get myself impaled on barbed wire at one party - we went to see the horses. Mum took me for a tetanus shot after, the hosting (farming) family figured once I stopped crying I was okay.

I was criticised for ordering other children around. I was Important in the classroom and I brought that to parties. The hosting Mum generallly didn't like that. I'd been bigged up as funny, special and an important invite and then arrived as a short, skinny little bossy-boots. I also ate as if I'd never been fed. I said please and thank you and thankyouforhavingme, but I expect I was tolerated rather than welcomed.

No parents came to parties in my day.
I went to lots because my sister was scared to go alone.
Siblings, not parents were the norm.

Many parents seem to go to "parties" now. Because they are all held at venues.
One of the girls on my table had her party this month. The thank you cards were provided by the company (although they were handwritten by the parent). They offered £2.50 off any refreshments - you can go as a single consumer as opposed to a party group.

Musical chairs, pass the parcel, pin the tail on the donkey? As if.
This is the 21st century, grow up.

Clodfobble · 01-29-2012, 07:42 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sundae

Many parents seem to go to "parties" now. Because they are all held at venues.
One of the girls on my table had her party this month. The thank you cards were provided by the company (although they were handwritten by the parent). They offered £2.50 off any refreshments - you can go as a single consumer as opposed to a party group.

Ugh, this. Since September (including the ones that are upcoming, and the ones we didn't attend,) the kids have been invited to 7 parties--one sleepover, one at a house, and 5 at a single bouncy castle place called Pump It Up. Their main business model is birthday parties, and there's a multi-room system you travel through as the party progresses, so that 4 parties are going on at once but you feel like you have the place to yourselves. The full package deal, including the Saturday afternoon sweet spot, pizza and sodas for everyone, balloons, and invitations/thank you notes/prize bags provided by the company, costs about $400. And they are always booked well in advance. Absolute cheapest--weeknight, less time in the rooms, lower max number of kids, and nothing provided--is still $150. If you book your future party while a guest at another party, you get a discount.

Minifob has his heart set on this place. I've explained to him that if he has his party here, he will basically have to get no presents from us. He said that was okay, his friends would give him presents. Sigh.

Flint · 01-29-2012, 08:18 AM

Pump it Up? WOOOOOO!!! cloddd--it's AWESOME. Even I know that.

Effing $400 though?! I did not know that.

monster · 01-29-2012, 08:31 AM

Mine have never had a venue party and never will. At the house, each year, sleepovers start at 9. I told them they end at 13, but apparently I was mistaken on that one

Pass-the-parcel featured at most of them -by request, and has been adopted by many friends (yes, it's a British thing). The name always gets changed to Pass the Packet, though. Every party has a theme and the rest of the games/activities are based on the theme but stem from the games I played at parties as a child in the UK. (Pirate party = pin the X on the treasure map, What Time is it Captain Cook..... and more too complex to explain completely.... rolling the dice and dressing up to cut chocolate, digging for treasure blindfold...)

Clodfobble · 01-29-2012, 01:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Flint

Pump it Up? WOOOOOO!!! cloddd--it's AWESOME. Even I know that.

As a bouncy castle place, it's the best. The best thing is to go as an individual during the weekday, because no one ever does that. You really do have the whole place (the individuals room, that is) just for you and your kids, and the adults can get on the equipment too. And as an individual, it isn't any more expensive than any of the other places. But that's why birthday parties are their business model...

classicman · 01-29-2012, 01:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Flint

I'm just saying, if you leave your kid here, expecting me to "parent them" for several hours, they get parented by MY house rules.

Aliantha · 01-29-2012, 04:27 PM

We've only once done a 'venue' party for our boys, and that was for Aden's 13th, he wanted to go to a place that is like an adventure park where you go along in harnesses, and travel through a course with rope swings, abseiling, flying foxes etc. He took half a dozen friends including his brother, and that cost us about $400 in the end, which was a lot more than we wanted to spend, and we would never do it again, but he had a great time. His uncle went through the course with them too, which was really nice.

I generally dislike venue parties though. Mostly because the kids are forced to do what they're told to do for the whole time. I much prefer to have a party for the kids at home and plan a few activities, but mostly leave them to their own devices. It always worked out well for us (although they only ever had one or two actual planned parties).

As for sleep overs? Mine started going to them and hosting them when they were about 7 or 8 and they just don't seem to have stopped. Part of that is because we live a little way away from a lot of their friends, so often they just come down for the weekend, but mostly it's just because they behave themselves and just muck about watching dvd's and playing xbox, so it doesn't bother us. In fact, during the summer holidays, the local boys hang around in a group of 6 to 10 boys down at the skate park at the end of our street, and they seem to spend the holidays going from house to house as a group and just crashing out all over loungeroom floors. Who am I to change a local tradition? lol If it's only once a week, it's no big deal anyway.

I'm much more concerned about the types of parties the big boys get invited to these days though. They mostly don't bother going though which suits me just fine.

Sundae · 01-30-2012, 01:04 PM

Found the website for the party I mentioned above.
£15.50 per child.
Plus another £4.00 for the extras (I saw a party bag, I know which option they chose).
Possibly plus food and drinks for adults, allowed in on a 1:1 basis. Although they may have been expected to shift for themselves.

The invites went out to the whole class of 30, so let's suggest 20 came.
£390 even if parents aren't catered for - $610.

Okay they have bumper cars, a climbing wall, one of the largest play frames in North London (apparently). But no pass the package

richlevy · 01-30-2012, 07:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Flint

And, believe me, I hope your kid doesn't have an issue with me shouting at them like a boot camp drill sargeant, because when you notice how my kids are so well-behaved, that's why. You leave me in charge of them, I'm not taking one ounce of shit. I don't care how permissive you are at home.

Wow, and I thought The Great Santini was just a movie.

Okay, it was sort of based on Pat Conroy's life.

BigV · 01-31-2012, 11:26 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Flint

If someone leaves a kid at my house, I'm sending them a bill. This isn't a daycare.

And, believe me, I hope your kid doesn't have an issue with me shouting at them like a boot camp drill sargeant, because when you notice how my kids are so well-behaved, that's why. You leave me in charge of them, I'm not taking one ounce of shit. I don't care how permissive you are at home.

What hyperbolic bullshit.

Your kids are well-behaved because you "shout at them like a boot camp drill sergeant".

No they're not. They may well be well-behaved, but this isn't why. Not unless you and I have different universes where boot camp drill sergeants are dramatically different. That kind of behavior by the adult in charge, parent or otherwise is rarely acceptable, and even more rarely productive. I know because I've made that mistake. It has its place, in boot camp, with adults.

Flint · 02-04-2012, 02:23 AM

Oh poo on you, BigV, more like big bully, a.k.a. guy-who-ruins-everything.

You nutty libs wanna take my guns, my liberty, tax me to death, and now I can't even use a little hyperbole without "Mr. Internet Nazi" going all Nancy Pelosi on me. Geez Louise. You're like the drill sargeant at a camp that teaches people how to suck.

Annnd... . . . scene!

01-29-2012, 12:55 AM	#17
Flint Snowflake Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: Dystopia Posts: 13,136	I'm just saying, if you leave your kid here, expecting me to "parent them" for several hours, they get parented by MY house rules. __________________ **************** There's a level of facility that everyone needs to accomplish, and from there it's a matter of deciding for yourself how important ultra-facility is to your expression. ... I found, like Joseph Campbell said, if you just follow whatever gives you a little joy or excitement or awe, then you're on the right track. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Terry Bozzio**

01-29-2012, 01:23 AM	#19
Aliantha trying hard to be a better person Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Brisbane, Australia Posts: 16,493	I'm with Flint more or less. If kids are at my house unaccompanied, I'm going to treat them the same way I treat my own kids. If they don't like it, they don't come back. Most of them seem to keep coming though, so it can't be all bad. lol eta: and even if their parents are there, if they break my rules I'll be letting them know. __________________ Kind words are the music of the world. F. W. Faber Last edited by Aliantha; 01-29-2012 at 02:25 AM.

01-29-2012, 08:18 AM	#22
Flint Snowflake Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: Dystopia Posts: 13,136	Pump it Up? WOOOOOO!!! cloddd--it's AWESOME. Even I know that. Effing $400 though?! I did not know that. __________________ **************** There's a level of facility that everyone needs to accomplish, and from there it's a matter of deciding for yourself how important ultra-facility is to your expression. ... I found, like Joseph Campbell said, if you just follow whatever gives you a little joy or excitement or awe, then you're on the right track. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Terry Bozzio**

01-29-2012, 08:31 AM	#23
monster I hear them call the tide Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Perpetual Chaos Posts: 30,852	Mine have never had a venue party and never will. At the house, each year, sleepovers start at 9. I told them they end at 13, but apparently I was mistaken on that one Pass-the-parcel featured at most of them -by request, and has been adopted by many friends (yes, it's a British thing). The name always gets changed to Pass the Packet, though. Every party has a theme and the rest of the games/activities are based on the theme but stem from the games I played at parties as a child in the UK. (Pirate party = pin the X on the treasure map, What Time is it Captain Cook..... and more too complex to explain completely.... rolling the dice and dressing up to cut chocolate, digging for treasure blindfold...) __________________ The most difficult thing is the decision to act, the rest is merely tenacity Amelia Earhart

01-29-2012, 04:27 PM	#26
Aliantha trying hard to be a better person Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Brisbane, Australia Posts: 16,493	We've only once done a 'venue' party for our boys, and that was for Aden's 13th, he wanted to go to a place that is like an adventure park where you go along in harnesses, and travel through a course with rope swings, abseiling, flying foxes etc. He took half a dozen friends including his brother, and that cost us about $400 in the end, which was a lot more than we wanted to spend, and we would never do it again, but he had a great time. His uncle went through the course with them too, which was really nice. I generally dislike venue parties though. Mostly because the kids are forced to do what they're told to do for the whole time. I much prefer to have a party for the kids at home and plan a few activities, but mostly leave them to their own devices. It always worked out well for us (although they only ever had one or two actual planned parties). As for sleep overs? Mine started going to them and hosting them when they were about 7 or 8 and they just don't seem to have stopped. Part of that is because we live a little way away from a lot of their friends, so often they just come down for the weekend, but mostly it's just because they behave themselves and just muck about watching dvd's and playing xbox, so it doesn't bother us. In fact, during the summer holidays, the local boys hang around in a group of 6 to 10 boys down at the skate park at the end of our street, and they seem to spend the holidays going from house to house as a group and just crashing out all over loungeroom floors. Who am I to change a local tradition? lol If it's only once a week, it's no big deal anyway. I'm much more concerned about the types of parties the big boys get invited to these days though. They mostly don't bother going though which suits me just fine. __________________ Kind words are the music of the world. F. W. Faber

01-29-2012, 12:53 AM	#16
infinite monkey Person who doesn't update the user title Join Date: Mar 2011 Posts: 13,002	If you've planned a party for kids, you expect non-military behavior. It's not that hard! Wow, the generation beyond 'helicopter parents' is 'gestapo parents'. I'm frightened.

01-29-2012, 12:58 AM	#18
infinite monkey Person who doesn't update the user title Join Date: Mar 2011 Posts: 13,002	Oh, absolutely. I was thinking how my younger brother's girls know how to be gracious, and to not be jerks. Kids need to know the etiquette, and too many parents don't teach them. A rambunctious kid is awesome. A rude kid is tiresome.

01-29-2012, 06:00 AM	#20
Sundae polaroid of perfection Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: West Yorkshire Posts: 24,185	If Flint meant what Ali said, then I'm with it too. I was chastised at many parties - I was an excitable and hyper little girl. I managed to get myself impaled on barbed wire at one party - we went to see the horses. Mum took me for a tetanus shot after, the hosting (farming) family figured once I stopped crying I was okay. I was criticised for ordering other children around. I was Important in the classroom and I brought that to parties. The hosting Mum generallly didn't like that. I'd been bigged up as funny, special and an important invite and then arrived as a short, skinny little bossy-boots. I also ate as if I'd never been fed. I said please and thank you and thankyouforhavingme, but I expect I was tolerated rather than welcomed. No parents came to parties in my day. I went to lots because my sister was scared to go alone. Siblings, not parents were the norm. Many parents seem to go to "parties" now. Because they are all held at venues. One of the girls on my table had her party this month. The thank you cards were provided by the company (although they were handwritten by the parent). They offered £2.50 off any refreshments - you can go as a single consumer as opposed to a party group. Musical chairs, pass the parcel, pin the tail on the donkey? As if. This is the 21st century, grow up.

01-30-2012, 01:04 PM	#27
Sundae polaroid of perfection Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: West Yorkshire Posts: 24,185	Found the website for the party I mentioned above. £15.50 per child. Plus another £4.00 for the extras (I saw a party bag, I know which option they chose). Possibly plus food and drinks for adults, allowed in on a 1:1 basis. Although they may have been expected to shift for themselves. The invites went out to the whole class of 30, so let's suggest 20 came. £390 even if parents aren't catered for - $610. Okay they have bumper cars, a climbing wall, one of the largest play frames in North London (apparently). But no pass the package

02-04-2012, 02:23 AM	#30
Flint Snowflake Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: Dystopia Posts: 13,136	Oh poo on you, BigV, more like big bully, a.k.a. guy-who-ruins-everything. You nutty libs wanna take my guns, my liberty, tax me to death, and now I can't even use a little hyperbole without "Mr. Internet Nazi" going all Nancy Pelosi on me. Geez Louise. You're like the drill sargeant at a camp that teaches people how to suck. Annnd... . . . scene! __________________ **************** There's a level of facility that everyone needs to accomplish, and from there it's a matter of deciding for yourself how important ultra-facility is to your expression. ... I found, like Joseph Campbell said, if you just follow whatever gives you a little joy or excitement or awe, then you're on the right track. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Terry Bozzio**

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