SHOUT SHOUT - Page 17

Undertoad · 06-02-2009, 09:40 AM

My English teacher wanted to flunk me in Junior High
Thanks a lot, next semester I'll be 35
I smacked him in his face with an eraser, chased him with a stapler
Stapled his nuts to a stack of papers
Walked in the strip club, had my jacket zipped up
Flashed the bartender, then stuck my dick in the tip cup
Extraterrestrial, running over pedestrians
In a space ship while they screaming at me: "LET'S JUST BE FRIENDS!"
Ninety-nine percent of my life I was lied to
I just found out my mom does more dope than I do
I told her I'd grow up to be a famous rapper
Make a record about doing drugs and name it after her
You know you blew up when the women rush your stands
And try to touch your hands like some screaming Usher fans
This guy at White Castle asked for my autograph so
I signed it: 'Dear Dave, thanks for the support, ASSHOLE!'

capnhowdy · 06-02-2009, 04:05 PM

I got kicked off of my basketball team
for wearing high heel sneakers and acting like a queen....

Crimson Ghost · 06-02-2009, 11:33 PM

You heard the voice again last night
You're fooling yourself, this ain't no dream
Well maybe it's not too late
You can still feed the hand of fate
Just roll the dice and play the game

ZenGum · 06-03-2009, 03:19 AM

My little pony
I love my little pony

I brush

and comb

her hair

bwahahahaaaa

capnhowdy · 06-03-2009, 07:03 AM

And the sign said "Long haired freaky people need not apply"...

ZenGum · 06-03-2009, 08:11 PM

HAIR!

Gimme a head with hair!

Crimson Ghost · 06-03-2009, 11:52 PM

Don't touch, never ever steal
Unless you're in for the kill
Or you'll be hit by the curse of the pharaohs
Yes you'll be hit and the curse is on you

wolf · 06-04-2009, 01:43 AM

I met a guy who looked like he might have been a hat check clerk at an ice rink, which in fact, he turned out to be.

06-04-2009, 04:01 AM

You were working as a waitress in a cocktail bar
When I met you
I picked you out, I shook you up, and turned you around
Turned you into someone new

ZenGum · 06-04-2009, 04:50 AM

It's just another manic Monday
I wish it was Sunday
'Cause that's my funday
My I don't have to runday
It's just another manic Monday

Worst lyrics ever?

Pie · 06-04-2009, 04:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ZenGum

Worst lyrics ever?

No, I believe the honor belongs to a different Bangles song:

Close your eyes
Give me your hand, darlin’
Do you feel my heart beating
Do you understand
Do you feel the same
Am I only dreaming
Is this burning an eternal flame?

We always changed it to: Is this burning some sort of infection?

kerosene · 06-04-2009, 06:02 PM

I didn't know you had a rock-n-roll record
Until I saw your picture on another guy's jacket
You told me I was the only one
But look at you now It's dark and you're gone

Undertoad · 06-04-2009, 09:35 AM

I come home in the morning light
My mother says when you gonna live your life right
Oh mother dear we're not the fortunate ones

glatt · 06-04-2009, 09:38 AM

You pops caught you smoking and he said, "No way!"
That hypocrite smokes two packs a day
Man, living at home is such a drag
Now your mom threw away your best porno mag

Queen of the Ryche · 06-04-2009, 03:58 PM

In walked her daddy standing six foot four, said "You ain't gonna swing with my daughter no more."

06-02-2009, 04:05 PM	#2
capnhowdy Blatantly Homosapien Join Date: Mar 2004 Posts: 6,200	I got kicked off of my basketball team for wearing high heel sneakers and acting like a queen.... __________________ Please type slowly. I can't read very fast............... and no holy water, please.

06-02-2009, 11:33 PM	#3
Crimson Ghost Larger than life and twice as ugly. Join Date: Apr 2004 Posts: 5,264	You heard the voice again last night You're fooling yourself, this ain't no dream Well maybe it's not too late You can still feed the hand of fate Just roll the dice and play the game __________________ We must all go through a rite of passage. It must be physical, it must be painful, and it must leave a mark. I have no knowledge of the events which you are describing, and if I did have knowledge of them, I would be unable to discuss them with you now or at any future period. Don't waste your time always searching for those wasted years

06-03-2009, 03:19 AM	#4
ZenGum Doctor Wtf Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: Badelaide, Baustralia Posts: 12,861	My little pony I love my little pony I brush and comb her hair bwahahahaaaa __________________ Shut up and hug. MoreThanPretty, Nov 5, 2008. Just because I'm nominally polite, does not make me a pussy. Sundae Girl.

06-03-2009, 07:03 AM	#5
capnhowdy Blatantly Homosapien Join Date: Mar 2004 Posts: 6,200	And the sign said "Long haired freaky people need not apply"... __________________ Please type slowly. I can't read very fast............... and no holy water, please.

06-03-2009, 08:11 PM	#6
ZenGum Doctor Wtf Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: Badelaide, Baustralia Posts: 12,861	HAIR! Gimme a head with hair! __________________ Shut up and hug. MoreThanPretty, Nov 5, 2008. Just because I'm nominally polite, does not make me a pussy. Sundae Girl.

06-02-2009, 09:40 AM	#1
Undertoad Radical Centrist Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: Cottage of Prussia Posts: 31,423	My English teacher wanted to flunk me in Junior High Thanks a lot, next semester I'll be 35 I smacked him in his face with an eraser, chased him with a stapler Stapled his nuts to a stack of papers Walked in the strip club, had my jacket zipped up Flashed the bartender, then stuck my dick in the tip cup Extraterrestrial, running over pedestrians In a space ship while they screaming at me: "LET'S JUST BE FRIENDS!" Ninety-nine percent of my life I was lied to I just found out my mom does more dope than I do I told her I'd grow up to be a famous rapper Make a record about doing drugs and name it after her You know you blew up when the women rush your stands And try to touch your hands like some screaming Usher fans This guy at White Castle asked for my autograph so I signed it: 'Dear Dave, thanks for the support, ASSHOLE!'

06-03-2009, 11:52 PM	#7
Crimson Ghost Larger than life and twice as ugly. Join Date: Apr 2004 Posts: 5,264	Don't touch, never ever steal Unless you're in for the kill Or you'll be hit by the curse of the pharaohs Yes you'll be hit and the curse is on you __________________ We must all go through a rite of passage. It must be physical, it must be painful, and it must leave a mark. I have no knowledge of the events which you are describing, and if I did have knowledge of them, I would be unable to discuss them with you now or at any future period. Don't waste your time always searching for those wasted years

06-04-2009, 01:43 AM	#8
wolf lobber of scimitars Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Phila Burbs Posts: 20,774	I met a guy who looked like he might have been a hat check clerk at an ice rink, which in fact, he turned out to be. __________________ wolf eht htiw og "Conspiracies are the norm, not the exception." --G. Edward Griffin The Creature from Jekyll Island High Priestess of the Church of the Whale Penis

06-04-2009, 04:01 AM	#9
NoBoxes Guest Posts: n/a	You were working as a waitress in a cocktail bar When I met you I picked you out, I shook you up, and turned you around Turned you into someone new

06-04-2009, 04:50 AM	#10
ZenGum Doctor Wtf Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: Badelaide, Baustralia Posts: 12,861	It's just another manic Monday I wish it was Sunday 'Cause that's my funday My I don't have to runday It's just another manic Monday Worst lyrics ever? __________________ Shut up and hug. MoreThanPretty, Nov 5, 2008. Just because I'm nominally polite, does not make me a pussy. Sundae Girl.

06-04-2009, 06:02 PM	#12
kerosene Touring the facilities Join Date: Nov 2002 Location: The plains of Colorado Posts: 3,476	I didn't know you had a rock-n-roll record Until I saw your picture on another guy's jacket You told me I was the only one But look at you now It's dark and you're gone

06-04-2009, 09:35 AM	#13
Undertoad Radical Centrist Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: Cottage of Prussia Posts: 31,423	I come home in the morning light My mother says when you gonna live your life right Oh mother dear we're not the fortunate ones

06-04-2009, 09:38 AM	#14
glatt ™ Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: Arlington, VA Posts: 27,717	You pops caught you smoking and he said, "No way!" That hypocrite smokes two packs a day Man, living at home is such a drag Now your mom threw away your best porno mag

06-04-2009, 03:58 PM	#15
Queen of the Ryche is fleeing the scene Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Beautiful CO Posts: 1,510	In walked her daddy standing six foot four, said "You ain't gonna swing with my daughter no more." __________________ Once, in an interview, Chuck Norris admitted that he was not the most awesome thing ever. He declined to elaborate; but I believe we all know that he was referring to the existence of chocolate covered bacon. I'd rather be judged by twelve than carried by six.

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