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11-06-2016, 05:37 AM
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#1 |
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Rapscallion
Join Date: Aug 2016
Posts: 1,357
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A man from Texas and a lady from New Jersey were talking in a bar. They discussed the usual things about which state had the most of like roads, parks, bars etc. The lady finally said, how big is your pecker?
Texan said, five inches. Lady was like what? My husband in NJ has five inches. Texan says, wide? tarheel |
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11-06-2016, 12:07 PM
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#2 |
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The Un-Tuckian
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: South Central...KY that is
Posts: 39,517
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I can fill a tuna can.
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 These statements have not been evaluated by the FDA, EPA, FBI, DEA, CDC, or FDIC. These statements are not intended to diagnose, cause, treat, cure, or prevent any disease. If you feel you have been harmed/offended by, or, disagree with any of the above statements or images, please feel free to fuck right off. |
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11-06-2016, 12:17 PM
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#3 |
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Person who doesn't update the user title
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: La Crosse, WI
Posts: 8,924
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How do you know?
__________________
Annoy the ones that ignore you!!! I live a blessed life I Love my Country, I Fear the Government!!! Heavily medicated for the good of mankind. |
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11-06-2016, 12:20 PM
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#4 |
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The Un-Tuckian
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: South Central...KY that is
Posts: 39,517
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__________________
These statements have not been evaluated by the FDA, EPA, FBI, DEA, CDC, or FDIC. These statements are not intended to diagnose, cause, treat, cure, or prevent any disease. If you feel you have been harmed/offended by, or, disagree with any of the above statements or images, please feel free to fuck right off. |
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11-08-2016, 11:30 AM
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#5 |
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The Un-Tuckian
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: South Central...KY that is
Posts: 39,517
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__________________
These statements have not been evaluated by the FDA, EPA, FBI, DEA, CDC, or FDIC. These statements are not intended to diagnose, cause, treat, cure, or prevent any disease. If you feel you have been harmed/offended by, or, disagree with any of the above statements or images, please feel free to fuck right off. |
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11-10-2016, 12:09 PM
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#6 |
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The Un-Tuckian
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: South Central...KY that is
Posts: 39,517
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One thing I know for sure about President The Donald, he won't be using Teddy Roosevelt's "speak softly, and carry a big stick" plan...
...Trump's mouth is too big, and his hands are too small.
__________________
These statements have not been evaluated by the FDA, EPA, FBI, DEA, CDC, or FDIC. These statements are not intended to diagnose, cause, treat, cure, or prevent any disease. If you feel you have been harmed/offended by, or, disagree with any of the above statements or images, please feel free to fuck right off. |
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11-10-2016, 12:26 PM
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#7 |
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The Un-Tuckian
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: South Central...KY that is
Posts: 39,517
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The very definition of 'trust':
Two cannibals giving each other blowjobs.
__________________
These statements have not been evaluated by the FDA, EPA, FBI, DEA, CDC, or FDIC. These statements are not intended to diagnose, cause, treat, cure, or prevent any disease. If you feel you have been harmed/offended by, or, disagree with any of the above statements or images, please feel free to fuck right off. |
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11-10-2016, 12:32 PM
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#8 |
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To shreds, you say?
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: in the house and on the street-how many, many feet we meet!
Posts: 18,449
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A rapist, a narcissist, and a bigot walk into a bar and the bartender says, "What can I get for you, Mr. President?"
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The internet is a hateful stew of vomit you can never take completely seriously. - Her Fobs |
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11-17-2016, 07:29 PM
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#9 |
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Rapscallion
Join Date: Aug 2016
Posts: 1,357
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Three men in a raft. A preacher, doctor and a lawyer. They sight land and try as they might can't hand paddle closer to the beach. Someone has to swim for help. Preacher couldn't go, might have to administer last rites. Doctor said he might have to save a life. Lawyer said no problem and started swimming for shore. A great white shark started trailing the lawyer. The doctor and preacher started hollering. The lawyer turned his head as the great white came beside him laying his hand on a fin and then towed to shore. When the doctor and preacher were brought back to land by the coast guard they met with the lawyer. " Man we thought you was gone when that shark swam to you. Then it just towed you to land," said the preacher. The lawyer said, " no problem it was just professional courtesy. "
tarheel |
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12-05-2016, 11:05 AM
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#10 |
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The Un-Tuckian
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: South Central...KY that is
Posts: 39,517
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This girl had on a tube top that said, 'Hottie.' I was thinking, 'This bitch has a good sense of humor.' 'Sweaty' might have been a better word. I don't know how big she was, but she had on a tube top, and those little hip huggers -- looked like a can of biscuits had popped open.
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These statements have not been evaluated by the FDA, EPA, FBI, DEA, CDC, or FDIC. These statements are not intended to diagnose, cause, treat, cure, or prevent any disease. If you feel you have been harmed/offended by, or, disagree with any of the above statements or images, please feel free to fuck right off. |
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12-06-2016, 10:36 AM
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#11 |
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To shreds, you say?
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: in the house and on the street-how many, many feet we meet!
Posts: 18,449
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I think that joke needs a bit more work.
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The internet is a hateful stew of vomit you can never take completely seriously. - Her Fobs |
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12-06-2016, 12:01 PM
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#12 |
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The Un-Tuckian
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: South Central...KY that is
Posts: 39,517
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Well, it needs to be heard, not read.
Plus: I copy/pasted it from a joke site that may, or may not use English as it's first language. All ya need is the visual anyway. Grammatical perfection was not the aim at any point in the manufacture of that joke, I don't believe. But, you are correct.
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12-11-2016, 02:44 PM
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#13 |
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The Un-Tuckian
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: South Central...KY that is
Posts: 39,517
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__________________
These statements have not been evaluated by the FDA, EPA, FBI, DEA, CDC, or FDIC. These statements are not intended to diagnose, cause, treat, cure, or prevent any disease. If you feel you have been harmed/offended by, or, disagree with any of the above statements or images, please feel free to fuck right off. |
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12-11-2016, 02:45 PM
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#14 |
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The Un-Tuckian
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: South Central...KY that is
Posts: 39,517
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__________________
These statements have not been evaluated by the FDA, EPA, FBI, DEA, CDC, or FDIC. These statements are not intended to diagnose, cause, treat, cure, or prevent any disease. If you feel you have been harmed/offended by, or, disagree with any of the above statements or images, please feel free to fuck right off. |
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12-11-2016, 10:52 PM
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#15 |
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To shreds, you say?
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: in the house and on the street-how many, many feet we meet!
Posts: 18,449
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What's better than roses on YOUR piano?
Tulips on YOUR organ. For Christ's sake, the words matter.
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The internet is a hateful stew of vomit you can never take completely seriously. - Her Fobs |
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