How do you like your Bacon Cooked ? - Page 3

Griff · 03-03-2010, 07:38 PM

There must be a nitrite connection here somewhere...

lumberjim · 02-05-2010, 11:43 AM

what was that story about the lady giving her husband head in the kitchen, and him spilling hot bacon grease down her back some how, and then she bit down.... and he whacked her with the pan.....i tried to google it... no luck.

squirell nutkin · 02-16-2010, 11:53 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by lumberjim

what was that story about the lady giving her husband head in the kitchen, and him spilling hot bacon grease down her back some how, and then she bit down.... and he whacked her with the pan.....i tried to google it... no luck.

I know it! And when the ambulance comes to get them, the driver gets out and runs around to the back to open the door and there is a hook stuck in the door handle!

Sundae · 02-05-2010, 01:13 PM

Little Johnny's parents are in the bedroom, sampling some afternoon delight. Dad walks out and Johnny asks what they'd been doing. "Making bacon!" Dad replies.

Next day it's Mum who comes out of the bedroom first.
"You've been making bacon" says little Johnny.
"Yes we have" replies Mum, "How can you tell?"

"The fat is running down your leg"

Cloud · 02-17-2010, 06:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sundae Girl

Little Johnny's parents are in the bedroom, sampling some afternoon delight. Dad walks out and Johnny asks what they'd been doing. "Making bacon!" Dad replies.

Next day it's Mum who comes out of the bedroom first.
"You've been making bacon" says little Johnny.
"Yes we have" replies Mum, "How can you tell?"

"The fat is running down your leg"

Man, that joke is OLD! I think I heard it first in 7th grade. (tho' it referenced a turkey sandwich and mayonnaise.)

TheMercenary · 02-16-2010, 12:01 PM

I love it cooked to a crisp. Not burnt but close.

BrianR · 02-16-2010, 06:58 PM

I must be weird.

I prefer my bacon barely cooked until it's still flabby. No cripsiness needed. It keeps all it's natural flavor that way. Crisper bacon has proportionately less taste, IMO.

Oh and I keep bacon grease too, same as Pie does.

Pete Zicato · 02-17-2010, 08:52 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BrianR

Oh and I keep bacon grease too, same as Pie does.

♪ ♫ They serve their chicken fried in bacon grease;
it's just down the road, down the road a piece ♪ ♫

Yznhymr · 02-18-2010, 02:26 PM

What's better than bacon wrapped bacon?

I like Canadian Bacon wrapped with Salt Pork wrapped with Pancetta wrapped with Prociutto wrapped with Double-Smoked Thick Sliced Bacon wrapped with Slab Bacon and topped with Bacon-bits.

Yeah, I'm serious about bacon.

Glinda · 02-18-2010, 10:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Yznhymr

What's better than bacon wrapped bacon?

I like Canadian Bacon wrapped with Salt Pork wrapped with Pancetta wrapped with Prociutto wrapped with Double-Smoked Thick Sliced Bacon wrapped with Slab Bacon and topped with Bacon-bits.

Yeah, I'm serious about bacon.

Please invite me to your home for supper.

Clodfobble · 02-18-2010, 03:41 PM

We ordered takeout from this authentic Chinese place near us the other night. I got "Pork Soup with Chinese Pickles" and Mr. Clod got "Pork with Preserved Vegetables." The lady on the phone was extremely dubious--first she said, "You are Chinese?" Mr. Clod laughed and said he was about as white as they come, and she said, "Oh, your wife is Chinese then." He assured her I was not, but that we liked to eat interesting food, and we weren't scared. She was unconvinced. When I went to pick up the order, she again questioned me on what sort of experience we had eating real Chinese food, and you could tell she really, really wanted to just take the food back and bring me a nice container of fried rice and sesame chicken instead.

Anyway, I finally made it out of there, by now extremely curious about what crazy thing we'd committed ourselves to eating. Turns out that in both cases, where the menu said "pork" they really meant "bacon." Mr. Clod's dish was basically half a package of bacon, laid on top of this unidentifiable stuff that looked like very sauteed onions--like French Onion Soup without the soup. It tasted awesome. And my soup was essentially a clear broth with gigantic pieces of cabbage, and the other half of the package of bacon. Also delicious. I really don't understand why the lady thought we wouldn't like them; it's not like the flavors were strange or inaccessible.

Shawnee123 · 02-19-2010, 08:09 AM

How do I like my bacon cooked?

In sets of ten.

ZenGum · 03-05-2010, 01:12 AM

[Thread Drift]

When I was n high school in the late 80s, there were two lads from Afghanistan who had been smuggled out when the Russians put prices on their heads. They had been approaching tanks to cell 'cigarettes' to the crew, and when the crew opened the hatch to buy them, would drop in a grenade.

No one messed with those kids.

monster · 03-05-2010, 11:40 AM

right. should have wrapped the grenade in bacon.

ZenGum · 03-06-2010, 12:24 AM

In Afghanistan?

Tres haram, dude.

View Poll Results: How do you Like your Bacon Cooked ?
Raw	0	0%
With some tooth ( Slight chewieness )	14	36.84%
Medium Well	18	47.37%
Burnt to a crisp	6	15.79%
Voters: 38. You may not vote on this poll

03-03-2010, 07:38 PM	#1
Griff still says videotape Join Date: Feb 2001 Posts: 26,813	There must be a nitrite connection here somewhere... __________________ If you would only recognize that life is hard, things would be so much easier for you. - Louis D. Brandeis

02-05-2010, 11:43 AM	#2
lumberjim I can hear my ears Join Date: Oct 2003 Posts: 25,571	what was that story about the lady giving her husband head in the kitchen, and him spilling hot bacon grease down her back some how, and then she bit down.... and he whacked her with the pan.....i tried to google it... no luck. __________________ This body holding me reminds me of my own mortality Embrace this moment, remember We are eternal, all this pain is an illusion ~MJKeenan

02-16-2010, 06:58 PM	#7
BrianR Cleverly disguised as a responsible adult Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: Dallas, TX Posts: 3,338	I must be weird. I prefer my bacon barely cooked until it's still flabby. No cripsiness needed. It keeps all it's natural flavor that way. Crisper bacon has proportionately less taste, IMO. Oh and I keep bacon grease too, same as Pie does. __________________ Never be afraid to tell the world who you are. -- Anonymous

02-18-2010, 02:26 PM	#9
Yznhymr the crowd goes wild! Join Date: May 2007 Location: USA Posts: 663	What's better than bacon wrapped bacon? I like Canadian Bacon wrapped with Salt Pork wrapped with Pancetta wrapped with Prociutto wrapped with Double-Smoked Thick Sliced Bacon wrapped with Slab Bacon and topped with Bacon-bits. Yeah, I'm serious about bacon. __________________ "The pride system tends to intensify the self-hate against which it is supposed to be a defense, since any failure to live up to one's tyrannical shoulds or of the world to honor one's claims leads to feelings of worthlessness." Bernard J. Paris, Ph.D.

02-05-2010, 01:13 PM	#4
Sundae polaroid of perfection Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: West Yorkshire Posts: 24,185	Little Johnny's parents are in the bedroom, sampling some afternoon delight. Dad walks out and Johnny asks what they'd been doing. "Making bacon!" Dad replies. Next day it's Mum who comes out of the bedroom first. "You've been making bacon" says little Johnny. "Yes we have" replies Mum, "How can you tell?" "The fat is running down your leg"

02-16-2010, 12:01 PM	#6
TheMercenary “Hypocrisy: prejudice with a halo” Join Date: Mar 2007 Location: Savannah, Georgia Posts: 21,393	I love it cooked to a crisp. Not burnt but close.

02-18-2010, 03:41 PM	#11
Clodfobble UNDER CONDITIONAL MITIGATION Join Date: Mar 2004 Location: Austin, TX Posts: 20,012	We ordered takeout from this authentic Chinese place near us the other night. I got "Pork Soup with Chinese Pickles" and Mr. Clod got "Pork with Preserved Vegetables." The lady on the phone was extremely dubious--first she said, "You are Chinese?" Mr. Clod laughed and said he was about as white as they come, and she said, "Oh, your wife is Chinese then." He assured her I was not, but that we liked to eat interesting food, and we weren't scared. She was unconvinced. When I went to pick up the order, she again questioned me on what sort of experience we had eating real Chinese food, and you could tell she really, really wanted to just take the food back and bring me a nice container of fried rice and sesame chicken instead. Anyway, I finally made it out of there, by now extremely curious about what crazy thing we'd committed ourselves to eating. Turns out that in both cases, where the menu said "pork" they really meant "bacon." Mr. Clod's dish was basically half a package of bacon, laid on top of this unidentifiable stuff that looked like very sauteed onions--like French Onion Soup without the soup. It tasted awesome. And my soup was essentially a clear broth with gigantic pieces of cabbage, and the other half of the package of bacon. Also delicious. I really don't understand why the lady thought we wouldn't like them; it's not like the flavors were strange or inaccessible. __________________ My book My other book My spirit animal

02-19-2010, 08:09 AM	#12
Shawnee123 Why, you're a regular Alfred E Einstein, ain't ya? Join Date: Jun 2006 Posts: 21,206	How do I like my bacon cooked? In sets of ten. __________________ A word to the wise ain't necessary - it's the stupid ones who need the advice. --Bill Cosby

03-05-2010, 01:12 AM	#13
ZenGum Doctor Wtf Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: Badelaide, Baustralia Posts: 12,861	[Thread Drift] When I was n high school in the late 80s, there were two lads from Afghanistan who had been smuggled out when the Russians put prices on their heads. They had been approaching tanks to cell 'cigarettes' to the crew, and when the crew opened the hatch to buy them, would drop in a grenade. No one messed with those kids. __________________ Shut up and hug. MoreThanPretty, Nov 5, 2008. Just because I'm nominally polite, does not make me a pussy. Sundae Girl.

03-05-2010, 11:40 AM	#14
monster I hear them call the tide Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Perpetual Chaos Posts: 30,852	right. should have wrapped the grenade in bacon. __________________ The most difficult thing is the decision to act, the rest is merely tenacity Amelia Earhart

03-06-2010, 12:24 AM	#15
ZenGum Doctor Wtf Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: Badelaide, Baustralia Posts: 12,861	In Afghanistan? Tres haram, dude. __________________ Shut up and hug. MoreThanPretty, Nov 5, 2008. Just because I'm nominally polite, does not make me a pussy. Sundae Girl.

Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)