How to be a Bully.....online? - Page 2

lumberjim · 12-17-2006, 06:31 PM

so...you're trying to start shit between me and Griff? that's not very nice.

Aliantha · 12-17-2006, 06:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by lumberjim

so...you're trying to start shit between me and Griff? that's not very nice.

I'm not trying to start shit between you and anyone. My response was reasonable.

Aliantha · 12-17-2006, 06:34 PM

About your second response, I think there's a big difference in what some people percieve as humour and what others see as nastiness.

I guess all humour has its roots in satire, but maybe I just prefer more subtle forms of it and that's why I find your overt and explicit comments rather base.

I think the difference between funny and being a bully is that if even the intended victim can see the humour then it's harmless, but the minute you're getting amusment out of someone else's pain, discomfort or sadness...even anger, then from what i know of bullying, that makes you a bully.

lumberjim · 12-17-2006, 06:41 PM

that was a joke. i guess you weren't shitting me when you said you don't find me funny.

Aliantha · 12-17-2006, 06:43 PM

Nope, I was being honest as always.

zippyt · 12-17-2006, 07:09 PM

change the catpion to "EVERRUDE" , thats LJ ( no offence dude ) , he's a ShitStirer from WAAAAY back !!!

( oh and incace you didn't know Evinrude is a boat motor mnfg )

Clodfobble · 12-17-2006, 07:10 PM

I think the primary distinction is the role humor plays in the interaction. Someone who's "just a jerk" will get mad and call you names, someone who's a "bully" will make fun of you and what's more, genuinely make you feel inferior (i.e., be successful at what they set out to do.) At any rate, I think you're funny, not a bully, because you take just as well as you give and you're really an equal-opportunity teaser, you've made fun of almost everyone at one time or another.

At any rate, I did a search for the word bully just to get a general idea on some things, and meanwhile compiled this interesting collection of stats:

--marichiko has called wolf and the US a bully multiple times, but never LJ
--Cheyenne and Lady Sidhe also agreed that wolf is a bully, but FileNotFound said "We really don't care if Wolf is being a bully."
--xoxoxoBruce believes Urbane Guerrilla is a bully, but that UT "has never been" one.
--Tonchi agrees that Urbane Guerrilla is a bully, but Carbonated Brains disagrees with Bruce and believes UT is one.
--mrnoodle says police officers are bullies.
--George W. Bush and the US have received the most number of votes by far, including marichiko, DanaC, Radar, iamthewalrus109, joemama, ScottSolomon, hermit22, jaguar, Elspode, and tw
--tw also believes, however, that North Korea and tailgaters are bullies, and jaguar also extends the courtesy to Microsoft
--John Bolton, sycamore, Whit, and bmwmcaw also got labeled by Hippikos, FelinesAreFine, TasneemProject, and yesman065, respectively.
--headsplice and Cam both agree that Shaquille O'Neal is a huge bully

And in conclusion, this exchange between lumberjim and Undertoad pretty much sums it up:

LJ: "IT'S TRUE. I was a dick. I used to be a bit of a bully in jr high. i've mellowed since. i havent been in an actual fight since i was 12 yrs old."
UT: "YOU WERE THE KID WHO BEAT ME UP IN SIXTH GRADE!!! Fuck you man!!! How have you redeemed your self!!!"
LJ: "i have redeemed myself. I saved several dorks from certain beatings in high school. One kid named Forest in particular. A kid named sean that was all covered in muscle was going to beat him up for being prissy. i had but to ask him nicely not to as a favor to me. Forest was very grateful. Then, Irony took over. several years later, my girlfriend in college cheated on me with Forest. Feel better?"
UT: "Phew! That was close!"

lumberjim · 12-17-2006, 07:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Clodfobble

--marichiko has called wolf and the US a bully multiple times, but never LJ

inherent problem with word searches.

wolf · 12-20-2006, 10:03 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by lumberjim

inherent problem with word searches.

Mari's use of the anon account to defend herself means, what, really?

lumberjim · 12-20-2006, 10:40 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by wolf

Mari's use of the anon account to defend herself means, what, really?

in the context that i posted that, i was just saying that if you search for the word 'bully', you may miss a description of bullying, and further, that when cross linking for your stats, it fails to consider the use of alternate logins. wasn't really a comment on her use of anon to defend her position.

Beestie · 12-17-2006, 08:26 PM

LJ's no bully.

A bully picks on people even after they say "uncle." Bullies are afraid of real opponents and steer clear of battles they stand even a remote chance of losing. Bullies never fight for principles. Bullies are basically 800 pound chickens looking for somebody to sit on.

None of those fit LJ.

Spexxvet · 12-17-2006, 09:13 PM

I don't think LJ is a bully. He does some harrassing, but usually he's just having fun with people - like a cat batting around a mouse. He's crude, caustic, and cynical, and he says "cunt". Some of these traits make him less than cuddly and lovable, but not a bully.

kerosene · 12-17-2006, 09:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Clodfobble

--Cheyenne and Lady Sidhe also agreed that wolf is a bully, but FileNotFound said "We really don't care if Wolf is being a bully."

A couple of names there I thought I wouldn't read on the cellar again.

Entertaining read, Clod. Thanks for extracting that data.

LJ, I use to think you were a shit stirrer...but I tend to think that you aren't truly "trying" to stir shit...you can't help yourself. It's like an addiction, isn't it? That's my theory, anyway. I find myself laughing at much of what you say, but I look behind me in shame to make sure nobody was reading what I laughed about thinking "You sick bitch."

12-18-2006, 04:43 AM

Most people who are called bullies on-line are those who do not invest emotions into a disagreement.
If you have one side arguing and another just disagreeing, the side that is simply dealing in facts and ignoring the emotional side will be called a bully every time, and that is false.
A bully is someone who harms with intent.
As for humor, since acting was my major and we spent a lot of time dealing with the subject and I read a great deal about it... all of it is based in some form of sadism.
You cannot show or tell me on joke that someone, even the teller themselves, is not the brunt of the joke in some form or fashion.
So, if one person is joking, it is only a matter of degree, as far as how much of a "bully" they are being compared to the next person joking around.
The fact is, we disagree in here and each of us has a different way of expressing our sides... if you don't like the way one person does it... leave them alone. It is very simple.

skysidhe · 12-18-2006, 11:02 AM

Most of you men are answering the question from an emotional perspective. You are saying you 'like the guy'

The question is he a bully? Does he intimidate?Does he use flamatory language against another? Does it enrage and or hurt another person?
Does he humiliate or shame a user? Does he try to expose supposed truths to a community by using hate speach to create conflict?

Can you say yes to any of those questions without getting your ass kissing in the way? Stop candy coating it. Like him if you want. Think he is funny if you want but stop trying to protect his feelings. He wants to be a kinder softer brute.

12-17-2006, 06:31 PM	#1
lumberjim I can hear my ears Join Date: Oct 2003 Posts: 25,571	so...you're trying to start shit between me and Griff? that's not very nice. __________________ This body holding me reminds me of my own mortality Embrace this moment, remember We are eternal, all this pain is an illusion ~MJKeenan

12-17-2006, 06:34 PM	#3
Aliantha trying hard to be a better person Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Brisbane, Australia Posts: 16,493	About your second response, I think there's a big difference in what some people percieve as humour and what others see as nastiness. I guess all humour has its roots in satire, but maybe I just prefer more subtle forms of it and that's why I find your overt and explicit comments rather base. I think the difference between funny and being a bully is that if even the intended victim can see the humour then it's harmless, but the minute you're getting amusment out of someone else's pain, discomfort or sadness...even anger, then from what i know of bullying, that makes you a bully. __________________ Kind words are the music of the world. F. W. Faber

12-17-2006, 06:41 PM	#4
lumberjim I can hear my ears Join Date: Oct 2003 Posts: 25,571	that was a joke. i guess you weren't shitting me when you said you don't find me funny. __________________ This body holding me reminds me of my own mortality Embrace this moment, remember We are eternal, all this pain is an illusion ~MJKeenan

12-17-2006, 06:43 PM	#5
Aliantha trying hard to be a better person Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Brisbane, Australia Posts: 16,493	Nope, I was being honest as always. __________________ Kind words are the music of the world. F. W. Faber

12-17-2006, 07:09 PM	#6
zippyt LONG LIVE KING ZIPPY! per Feetz Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: Arkansas Posts: 7,661	change the catpion to "EVERRUDE" , thats LJ ( no offence dude ) , he's a ShitStirer from WAAAAY back !!! ( oh and incace you didn't know Evinrude is a boat motor mnfg ) Attached Images __________________ "Success is getting what you want. Happiness is wanting what you get. " Brother Dave Gardner

12-17-2006, 07:10 PM	#7
Clodfobble UNDER CONDITIONAL MITIGATION Join Date: Mar 2004 Location: Austin, TX Posts: 20,012	I think the primary distinction is the role humor plays in the interaction. Someone who's "just a jerk" will get mad and call you names, someone who's a "bully" will make fun of you and what's more, genuinely make you feel inferior (i.e., be successful at what they set out to do.) At any rate, I think you're funny, not a bully, because you take just as well as you give and you're really an equal-opportunity teaser, you've made fun of almost everyone at one time or another. At any rate, I did a search for the word bully just to get a general idea on some things, and meanwhile compiled this interesting collection of stats: --marichiko has called wolf and the US a bully multiple times, but never LJ --Cheyenne and Lady Sidhe also agreed that wolf is a bully, but FileNotFound said "We really don't care if Wolf is being a bully." --xoxoxoBruce believes Urbane Guerrilla is a bully, but that UT "has never been" one. --Tonchi agrees that Urbane Guerrilla is a bully, but Carbonated Brains disagrees with Bruce and believes UT is one. --mrnoodle says police officers are bullies. --George W. Bush and the US have received the most number of votes by far, including marichiko, DanaC, Radar, iamthewalrus109, joemama, ScottSolomon, hermit22, jaguar, Elspode, and tw --tw also believes, however, that North Korea and tailgaters are bullies, and jaguar also extends the courtesy to Microsoft --John Bolton, sycamore, Whit, and bmwmcaw also got labeled by Hippikos, FelinesAreFine, TasneemProject, and yesman065, respectively. --headsplice and Cam both agree that Shaquille O'Neal is a huge bully And in conclusion, this exchange between lumberjim and Undertoad pretty much sums it up: LJ: "IT'S TRUE. I was a dick. I used to be a bit of a bully in jr high. i've mellowed since. i havent been in an actual fight since i was 12 yrs old." UT: "YOU WERE THE KID WHO BEAT ME UP IN SIXTH GRADE!!! Fuck you man!!! How have you redeemed your self!!!" LJ: "i have redeemed myself. I saved several dorks from certain beatings in high school. One kid named Forest in particular. A kid named sean that was all covered in muscle was going to beat him up for being prissy. i had but to ask him nicely not to as a favor to me. Forest was very grateful. Then, Irony took over. several years later, my girlfriend in college cheated on me with Forest. Feel better?" UT: "Phew! That was close!"

12-17-2006, 08:26 PM	#11
Beestie -◊\|≡·∙■·∙≡\|◊- Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: Parts unknown. Posts: 4,081	LJ's no bully. A bully picks on people even after they say "uncle." Bullies are afraid of real opponents and steer clear of battles they stand even a remote chance of losing. Bullies never fight for principles. Bullies are basically 800 pound chickens looking for somebody to sit on. None of those fit LJ. __________________ ♠ ♥ ♣ ♦

12-17-2006, 09:13 PM	#12
Spexxvet Makes some feel uncomfortable Join Date: Dec 2005 Posts: 10,346	I don't think LJ is a bully. He does some harrassing, but usually he's just having fun with people - like a cat batting around a mouse. He's crude, caustic, and cynical, and he says "cunt". Some of these traits make him less than cuddly and lovable, but not a bully. __________________ "I'm certainly free, nay compelled, to spread the gospel of Spex. " - xoxoxoBruce

12-18-2006, 04:43 AM	#14
rkzenrage Guest Posts: n/a	Most people who are called bullies on-line are those who do not invest emotions into a disagreement. If you have one side arguing and another just disagreeing, the side that is simply dealing in facts and ignoring the emotional side will be called a bully every time, and that is false. A bully is someone who harms with intent. As for humor, since acting was my major and we spent a lot of time dealing with the subject and I read a great deal about it... all of it is based in some form of sadism. You cannot show or tell me on joke that someone, even the teller themselves, is not the brunt of the joke in some form or fashion. So, if one person is joking, it is only a matter of degree, as far as how much of a "bully" they are being compared to the next person joking around. The fact is, we disagree in here and each of us has a different way of expressing our sides... if you don't like the way one person does it... leave them alone. It is very simple.

12-18-2006, 11:02 AM	#15
skysidhe ~~Life is either a daring adventure or nothing.~~ Join Date: Apr 2006 Posts: 6,828	Most of you men are answering the question from an emotional perspective. You are saying you 'like the guy' The question is he a bully? Does he intimidate?Does he use flamatory language against another? Does it enrage and or hurt another person? Does he humiliate or shame a user? Does he try to expose supposed truths to a community by using hate speach to create conflict? Can you say yes to any of those questions without getting your ass kissing in the way? Stop candy coating it. Like him if you want. Think he is funny if you want but stop trying to protect his feelings. He wants to be a kinder softer brute.

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