Very Politically Incorrect Humor

elSicomoro · 05-11-2003, 09:44 AM

Have you ever thought of something, but then put it in the back of your head quickly b/c you just KNEW it was wrong? To better explain, I present to you a couple of my recent brain sneezes:

Item #1: Why the hell would anyone kill Laci Peterson? Have you seen her? She was pretty hot...unless she was a nutcase.

Item #2: In Philadelphia, we apparently have a groper on the loose. He has grabbed 10 women in the past week...apparently, he rides by on a 10-speed bike, gropes their breasts or ass, and takes off.

Big fucking deal. So a guy grabs your boob or ass...are you going to tell me that it hasn't happened before? It's not like he grabbed your twat or anything.

Your turn...

05-11-2003, 10:43 AM

Yeah, I do that about everyone. Same about Laci Peterson, etc. I'm only human.

xoxoxoBruce · 05-11-2003, 11:09 AM

Quote:

Item #1: Why the hell would anyone kill Laci Peterson? Have you seen her? She was pretty hot...unless she was a nutcase.

The old saw"No matter how good she looks, someone, somewhere is tired of her shit" comes to mind.

Quote:

Item #2: In Philadelphia, we apparently have a groper on the loose. He has grabbed 10 women in the past week...apparently, he rides by on a 10-speed bike, gropes their breasts or ass, and takes off.

Sounds like trying to write grafitti on a moving truck from a motorcycle. Dangerous.

Quote:

Big fucking deal. So a guy grabs your boob or ass...are you going to tell me that it hasn't happened before? It's not like he grabbed your twat or anything.

Oooow! Are you gonna burn.

elSicomoro · 05-11-2003, 12:39 PM

Nah, I'm probably more likely to go to hell for all the shit I came up with after 9/11. That, and all the racial/ethnic/religious crap I come up with.

*light bulb pops on*

I don't know why I couldn't think of a better description earlier for these types of thoughts--lack of sleep, maybe. The term that best describes these thoughts is very politically incorrect humor. Duh! Sorry about that folks.

I have a very twisted sense of humor. I find humor in everything--happy/sad, good/bad, sacred/sacriligious. No one or thing is safe--an equal opportunity offender. Of course, I don't dare say some of it in public due to the outrage it would/could generate. Fortunately, Rho's sense of humor is as twisted as mine. And one only needs to look at some of the posts that Dave and I have generated as further online evidence.

Torrere · 05-12-2003, 11:02 PM

What I find to be fun is driving down the highway and half paying attention to the billboards lined up beside the highway. Sometimes my brain will process only part of the content from the sign and it will fill the rest of it in semi-randomly. When my minds devises a particularly strange sign, I double take and then find it highly amusing.

The most recent time that this happened, I saw a sign on the road to Bonners Ferry that said

Quote:

NEIGHBORHOOD COMMIE WATCH

I think that qualifies for politically incorrect.

Cam · 05-12-2003, 11:15 PM

Thank god I thought I was the only one that did that. I think it comes from reading too fast. I'm so used to filling in blanks without actually reading what's on the page when I read books that when I see a sign I just fill in every 3rd or 4th word with whatever context I'm thinking in at the time. You can see a lot of things that make you take a second look to correct yourself.

Undertoad · 05-12-2003, 11:43 PM

It's the guy's yellow sign.

"Iron my shirt"

Whit · 05-13-2003, 12:41 AM

     I have a thing for church signs that don't sound right. I've got several pics of such but I'll just tell you what they say to conserve bandwidth.

"You will recieve the power when the holy spirit comes on you"
"A loose tongue often gets into a tight place"
"The tongue being in a wet place is apt to slip"
"And behold I come quickly"
"Don't focus on you needs focus on your knees"
"The most powerful position is on your knees"

     These all make church seem like a fun place, but this next one kinda spooks me.
"Don't let worries kill you let the church help"

     I also remember one from years back that I don't have a pic of that said, "Take a friend to heaven."

wolf · 05-13-2003, 12:42 AM

I believe that photograph features ALL the protestors that showed up at Augusta. Nobody really cared. You can certainly feel the enthusiasm pouring off them, can't you?

xoxoxoBruce · 05-13-2003, 09:46 PM

Quote:

Oooow! Are you gonna burn.

I was thinking more along the lines of tied to a stake at a NOW convention.

elSicomoro · 05-13-2003, 11:48 PM

I had a moment similar to Torrere's today.

There is a charter school at the strip mall up the street from me. The name of it is Raising Horizons School. I initially thought the sign said Raging Hormones.

warch · 05-14-2003, 11:32 AM

There is (it seems to me) a growing Anti-Choice billboard champaign here. Each feature a cute white giggly baby with that elastic head bow thing with a message please to not kill me, my DNA is your DNA. One near our house has huge letters that say " I HAVE MY DADDY'S EYES!" While driving by, my spouse added "Mommy keeps them in a jar on the dresser."

elSicomoro · 05-14-2003, 11:54 AM

While I was driving through Ohio, I saw a ton of Highway Dept. signs urging people to slow down. They were written in "kidscrawl" and read like this:

Please slow down. My daddy works here. Thanks. Abbi

AND

Please slow down. My mommy works here. Thanks. Bobby

To which I would say almost every time I saw one, "Awww...that's cute. Too bad I don't give a damn about your mommy/daddy."

Now that I think about it, I should have said, "Ah, that must've been your daddy/mommy that I ran over about 30 miles back."

perth · 05-14-2003, 12:22 PM

next time im up that way, ill have to take a picture of the actual sign. below is a reasonable facsimile. when driving south on i-25, just past loveland, on the side of the road there is a sign that looks approximately like this:

just let that sink in. personally, i dont generally consider symbols to be part of proper sentence structure.

~james

Whit · 05-14-2003, 12:41 PM

Not only is using a symbol in a sentance annoying. In this case it's not neccecarily true. It depends when the abortion accurs. I really hate this kind of half-truth as fact advertising.
Hell, I haven't smoked a cigarette since the seventh grade, but since some of these anti-smoking commercials have come out I've seriously considered picking up the habit. Especially the one I heard where they liken asking someone to put out their cigarette to removing (various deadly animals) from their immediate vicinity. I remember one of them was a poisonous tree frog from their neck. This is stupid, sure smoking is unhealthy but it won't kill the average person within minutes.

05-12-2003, 11:15 PM	#6
Cam dripping with ignorance Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: Grand Forks ND Posts: 642	Thank god I thought I was the only one that did that. I think it comes from reading too fast. I'm so used to filling in blanks without actually reading what's on the page when I read books that when I see a sign I just fill in every 3rd or 4th word with whatever context I'm thinking in at the time. You can see a lot of things that make you take a second look to correct yourself. __________________ After the seventh beer I generally try and stay away from the keyboard, I apologize for what happens when I fail.

05-13-2003, 12:41 AM	#8
Whit Umm ... yeah. Join Date: Aug 2001 Location: Arkansas, USA Posts: 949	I have a thing for church signs that don't sound right. I've got several pics of such but I'll just tell you what they say to conserve bandwidth. "You will recieve the power when the holy spirit comes on you" "A loose tongue often gets into a tight place" "The tongue being in a wet place is apt to slip" "And behold I come quickly" "Don't focus on you needs focus on your knees" "The most powerful position is on your knees" These all make church seem like a fun place, but this next one kinda spooks me. "Don't let worries kill you let the church help" I also remember one from years back that I don't have a pic of that said, "Take a friend to heaven." __________________ A friend will help you move. A true friend will help you move a body.

05-13-2003, 12:42 AM	#9
wolf lobber of scimitars Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Phila Burbs Posts: 20,774	I believe that photograph features ALL the protestors that showed up at Augusta. Nobody really cared. You can certainly feel the enthusiasm pouring off them, can't you? __________________ wolf eht htiw og "Conspiracies are the norm, not the exception." --G. Edward Griffin The Creature from Jekyll Island High Priestess of the Church of the Whale Penis

05-14-2003, 12:41 PM	#15
Whit Umm ... yeah. Join Date: Aug 2001 Location: Arkansas, USA Posts: 949	Not only is using a symbol in a sentance annoying. In this case it's not neccecarily true. It depends when the abortion accurs. I really hate this kind of half-truth as fact advertising. Hell, I haven't smoked a cigarette since the seventh grade, but since some of these anti-smoking commercials have come out I've seriously considered picking up the habit. Especially the one I heard where they liken asking someone to put out their cigarette to removing (various deadly animals) from their immediate vicinity. I remember one of them was a poisonous tree frog from their neck. This is stupid, sure smoking is unhealthy but it won't kill the average person within minutes. __________________ A friend will help you move. A true friend will help you move a body.

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05-11-2003, 09:44 AM	#1
elSicomoro Person who doesn't update the user title Join Date: Jan 2001 Posts: 12,486	Insensitive items that may have been pondered Have you ever thought of something, but then put it in the back of your head quickly b/c you just KNEW it was wrong? To better explain, I present to you a couple of my recent brain sneezes: Item #1: Why the hell would anyone kill Laci Peterson? Have you seen her? She was pretty hot...unless she was a nutcase. Item #2: In Philadelphia, we apparently have a groper on the loose. He has grabbed 10 women in the past week...apparently, he rides by on a 10-speed bike, gropes their breasts or ass, and takes off. Big fucking deal. So a guy grabs your boob or ass...are you going to tell me that it hasn't happened before? It's not like he grabbed your twat or anything. Your turn...

05-11-2003, 10:43 AM	#2
dave Guest Posts: n/a	Yeah, I do that about everyone. Same about Laci Peterson, etc. I'm only human.

05-11-2003, 12:39 PM	#4
elSicomoro Person who doesn't update the user title Join Date: Jan 2001 Posts: 12,486	Nah, I'm probably more likely to go to hell for all the shit I came up with after 9/11. That, and all the racial/ethnic/religious crap I come up with. light bulb pops on I don't know why I couldn't think of a better description earlier for these types of thoughts--lack of sleep, maybe. The term that best describes these thoughts is very politically incorrect humor. Duh! Sorry about that folks. I have a very twisted sense of humor. I find humor in everything--happy/sad, good/bad, sacred/sacriligious. No one or thing is safe--an equal opportunity offender. Of course, I don't dare say some of it in public due to the outrage it would/could generate. Fortunately, Rho's sense of humor is as twisted as mine. And one only needs to look at some of the posts that Dave and I have generated as further online evidence.

05-12-2003, 11:43 PM	#7
Undertoad Radical Centrist Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: Cottage of Prussia Posts: 31,423	It's the guy's yellow sign. "Iron my shirt"

05-13-2003, 11:48 PM	#11
elSicomoro Person who doesn't update the user title Join Date: Jan 2001 Posts: 12,486	I had a moment similar to Torrere's today. There is a charter school at the strip mall up the street from me. The name of it is Raising Horizons School. I initially thought the sign said Raging Hormones.

05-14-2003, 11:32 AM	#12
warch lurkin old school Join Date: Oct 2001 Location: Minnesota Posts: 2,796	There is (it seems to me) a growing Anti-Choice billboard champaign here. Each feature a cute white giggly baby with that elastic head bow thing with a message please to not kill me, my DNA is your DNA. One near our house has huge letters that say " I HAVE MY DADDY'S EYES!" While driving by, my spouse added "Mommy keeps them in a jar on the dresser."

05-14-2003, 11:54 AM	#13
elSicomoro Person who doesn't update the user title Join Date: Jan 2001 Posts: 12,486	While I was driving through Ohio, I saw a ton of Highway Dept. signs urging people to slow down. They were written in "kidscrawl" and read like this: Please slow down. My daddy works here. Thanks. Abbi AND Please slow down. My mommy works here. Thanks. Bobby To which I would say almost every time I saw one, "Awww...that's cute. Too bad I don't give a damn about your mommy/daddy." Now that I think about it, I should have said, "Ah, that must've been your daddy/mommy that I ran over about 30 miles back."

05-14-2003, 12:22 PM	#14
perth Strong Silent Type Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: Fort Collins, CO Posts: 1,949	next time im up that way, ill have to take a picture of the actual sign. below is a reasonable facsimile. when driving south on i-25, just past loveland, on the side of the road there is a sign that looks approximately like this: just let that sink in. personally, i dont generally consider symbols to be part of proper sentence structure. ~james

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