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10-30-2005, 12:18 AM
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#1 |
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Gamehenge
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: Halifax, NS
Posts: 168
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You find your glasses, but on the table in the interview room where the police placed them, after THEY found them at the scene of a peeping tom.
I wish I had a Second Cup coffee shop closer to my home...
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It's Really Plain and Easy To See, The Family grows like fungus on a tree. |
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10-30-2005, 12:23 AM
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#2 |
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lobber of scimitars
Join Date: Jul 2001
Location: Phila Burbs
Posts: 20,774
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A Second Cup Coffee Shop opens closer to your home. In fact, your home and the surrounding neighborhood is demolished to make way for the Second Cup, a Lowes, and a Super Walmart.
I wish there were some clever shows on television.
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  wolf eht htiw og"Conspiracies are the norm, not the exception." --G. Edward Griffin The Creature from Jekyll Island High Priestess of the Church of the Whale Penis |
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10-30-2005, 01:16 AM
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#3 | |
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-◊|≡·∙■·∙≡|◊-
Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: Parts unknown.
Posts: 4,081
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Quote:
I wish I knew when I was going to die.
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♠ ♥ ♣ ♦ |
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10-30-2005, 01:33 AM
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#4 | |
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Victim of gravity
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Hiding in plain sight
Posts: 1,412
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Quote:
 I wish I knew what to do with this body.
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Everything you've ever heard about Fresno is true. |
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10-30-2005, 12:56 AM
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#5 |
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LONG LIVE KING ZIPPY! per Feetz
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: Arkansas
Posts: 7,661
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all media BUT television is here by banned , no books , no mags , NO NET !!!!!
The net is just simply turned OFF !!!!!!! nothing but MUST SEE TV!!! , the official viewing device is a head harness with eye lid clamps , and big dudes to clamp it on !!!, nothing BUT Clever shows ( with subliminal re-education footage in the back ground ) to watch , All HAIL GWB and the american republic !!!!!! I wish that i could hit the powerball lotto numbers !!!
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"Success is getting what you want. Happiness is wanting what you get. " Brother Dave Gardner |
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10-30-2005, 01:16 AM
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#6 |
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Victim of gravity
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Hiding in plain sight
Posts: 1,412
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Congratulations, you DO hit the powerball numbers, as well as two officials of the Lottery, with a sledge hammer you are wielding as you rush screaming onstage to demolish the studio where the drawing is being held. Police and security guards finally manage to subdue you and haul you away. The next day, papers all over the worldwill describe the rampage by a gentleman from Arkansas who went berserk when none out of the 10,563 lottery numbers he bought at bars this month was drawn. Wolf will keep us posted on your status
 I wish we didn't have to switch our clocks back tonight.
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Everything you've ever heard about Fresno is true. |
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10-30-2005, 01:57 AM
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#7 |
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LONG LIVE KING ZIPPY! per Feetz
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: Arkansas
Posts: 7,661
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bury it , beestie will start stinking after a few days left un refrigerated .
I wish i could not have to work , but still earn $1,000,000 a month for the rest of my life
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"Success is getting what you want. Happiness is wanting what you get. " Brother Dave Gardner |
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10-31-2005, 09:07 AM
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#8 |
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Master Dwellar
Join Date: Aug 2003
Posts: 4,197
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granted. unfortunately for you, your dog, Ollie, is the only one who can spend it. All he sees fit to buy is milkbones and fire hydrants.
i wish my sister wasn't such a bitch. then again, she's a lawyer, what'd i expect?
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For your dreams to come true, you must first have a dream. |
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10-31-2005, 09:33 AM
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#9 |
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dar512 is now Pete Zicato
Join Date: May 2003
Location: Chicago suburb
Posts: 4,968
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Your sister discovers the joy of Prozac. She becomes a very mellow and pleasant person. And now pretty much sucks as a lawyer. And you know, her husband Bubba has a bad back and has been out of work for a month of Sundays. So she, Bubba, and little Bubbas number 1 through number four are coming to live with you. Won't that be nice?
I wish this bug was already fixed.
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"Against stupidity the gods themselves contend in vain." -- Friedrich Schiller |
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10-31-2005, 11:11 AM
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#10 |
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The future is unwritten
Join Date: Oct 2002
Posts: 71,105
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The bug IS already fixed...everything you're doing now is screwing things up worse than ever.
 I wish I could turn back the clock a few weeks.
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The descent of man ~ Nixon, Friedman, Reagan, Trump. |
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10-31-2005, 01:44 PM
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#11 | |
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dar512 is now Pete Zicato
Join Date: May 2003
Location: Chicago suburb
Posts: 4,968
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Quote:
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"Against stupidity the gods themselves contend in vain." -- Friedrich Schiller |
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10-31-2005, 12:53 PM
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#12 |
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bent
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: under the weather
Posts: 2,656
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You turn the clock back a few weeks. Whatever you wish you had or had not done/said/witnessed/experienced is now granted. However, because of the laws of irony, you learn that timeless "be careful what you wish for" lesson. You recover, however, and life goes on pretty much as if nothing had happened. However, one night you start thinking, "If I can go back in time, can't anyone else? How many people are doing it right now? How many have I talked to that are actually reliving the moment for more than one time? If they are experiencing a moment with me for a second time, am I also experiencing it again? What if the current moment isn't current at all, but part of a "past" for someone else? Am I a replayed video, not even alive except for in the memory of another?"
You go batshit insane. The upside is, wolf stops by to visit when her shift is up and you both plot world domination over cookies and milk. I wish I had worked out this summer.
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Sìn a nall na cuaranan sin. -- Cha mhór is fheairrde thu iad, tha iad coltach ri cat air a dhathadh |
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10-31-2005, 11:50 PM
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#13 | |
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Larger than life and twice as ugly.
Join Date: Apr 2004
Posts: 5,264
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Quote:
You worked out so much that you body has become a hard, chisled, godlike icon to all that know you. But, now, you are a slave to working out. You work out so much that your ego says that you can benchpress more than you should. In the final seconds of your life, as the 900 pound-laden bar slams into your neck, nearly severing your head, the last thought in your mind is "This will end badly." I wish Microsoft would stop programming Windows to crash on a regular basis.
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We must all go through a rite of passage. It must be physical, it must be painful, and it must leave a mark. I have no knowledge of the events which you are describing, and if I did have knowledge of them, I would be unable to discuss them with you now or at any future period.   Don't waste your time always searching for those wasted years |
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11-01-2005, 12:54 PM
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#14 |
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When Do I Get Virtual Unreality?
Join Date: Dec 2002
Location: Raytown, Missouri
Posts: 12,719
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Microsoft reveals and markets a stupendous new version of Windows that never crashes and always works. However, this is only because the new version, dubbed "Windows 666", has been cursed by Satan, and soon all PC users are merrily computing their way into Hell. Mac owners, as always, are smugly secure in their choice of computers.
I wish closing day was complete.
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"To those of you who are wearing ties, I think my dad would appreciate it if you took them off." - Robert Moog |
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05-13-2006, 11:07 PM
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#15 |
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Goon Squad Leader
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: Seattle
Posts: 27,063
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Granted. Closing day (?) is complete. Unfortunately, there's always a catch, isn't there? Unfortunately, as the day draws to a close, um. Sadly, the day is closed. Completely closed. So closed that there is no memory of it. So completely closed completely that its as if it were never open. :dizzy:
I wish I had a clue about what closing day completion was all about.
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Be Just and Fear Not. |
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