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#1 |
hot
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: Jeffersonville, IN (near Louisville)
Posts: 892
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And my favorite one.. it's a visual joke, but at least you can tell it to others even if it's not funny written down:
<B>Q:</B> Why do all the chicks dig Jesus? <B>A:</B><I> (Stretch both hands outwards, like in a "fish that got away" pose).</I> Because he's hung like this. |
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#2 |
He who reads, sometimes writes.
Join Date: Sep 2001
Location: at the keyboard
Posts: 791
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Why don't most guys like to eat vegetables?
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#3 | |
going nowhere slow
Join Date: Nov 2002
Location: L.A.
Posts: 252
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Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: How many lesbians does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Quote:
1. I created the lesbian in the joke therefore as HER creator I maintain that she is a lesbian who still believes that most, if not all men are meant to be controlled by women as mere fools. 2. The handy man smokes massive amounts of crack cocaine and, after passing the bong back and forth a few times she totaly forgets that she is a lesbian and then she does the handy man. She would try once again to remind herself somehow the next morning to once and for all screw the godamm thing in this time. It was a daily ritual that required very much memory and wind power until one day they both found themselves homeless and somewhat high on crack, and finally converted to solar. THE END? : ]
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"There never seems to be enough time to do things you wanna' do once you find them."-excerpt from Jim Croce's 'Time in a Bottle'. |
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#4 | |
in the Hour of Scampering
Join Date: Jan 2001
Location: Jeffersonville PA (15 mi NW of Philadelphia)
Posts: 4,060
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Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: How many lesbians does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Quote:
<i>How many Centauri does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Just one, but in the great old days of the Republic hundreds of servants would leap to change a thousand lightbulbs at our slightest whim!</i>
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"Neither can his Mind be thought to be in Tune,whose words do jarre; nor his reason In frame, whose sentence is preposterous..." |
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#5 | |
in the Hour of Scampering
Join Date: Jan 2001
Location: Jeffersonville PA (15 mi NW of Philadelphia)
Posts: 4,060
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Quote:
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"Neither can his Mind be thought to be in Tune,whose words do jarre; nor his reason In frame, whose sentence is preposterous..." |
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#6 | |
going nowhere slow
Join Date: Nov 2002
Location: L.A.
Posts: 252
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Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: How many lesbians does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Quote:
:]
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"There never seems to be enough time to do things you wanna' do once you find them."-excerpt from Jim Croce's 'Time in a Bottle'. |
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#7 | |
going nowhere slow
Join Date: Nov 2002
Location: L.A.
Posts: 252
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Quote:
: ]
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"There never seems to be enough time to do things you wanna' do once you find them."-excerpt from Jim Croce's 'Time in a Bottle'. |
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#8 | |
Strong Silent Type
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: Fort Collins, CO
Posts: 1,949
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Quote:
~james |
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#9 | |
lobber of scimitars
Join Date: Jul 2001
Location: Phila Burbs
Posts: 20,774
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Quote:
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![]() ![]() "Conspiracies are the norm, not the exception." --G. Edward Griffin The Creature from Jekyll Island High Priestess of the Church of the Whale Penis |
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#10 | |
lobber of scimitars
Join Date: Jul 2001
Location: Phila Burbs
Posts: 20,774
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Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: How many lesbians does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Quote:
A bong is a water-pipe used for smoking marijuana. Crack cocaine is smoked using a "stem" which does not contain a water chamber, and may be constructed of glass (for fancy upscale users) or the largest piece of a telescoping antenna (your basic, average, crack stole my life users). I have confiscated more antennas, although the cleverest version I saw came from a prisoner who had fashioned a combination shiv, potato peeler & crack stem in his spare time at the county correctional facility.
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![]() ![]() "Conspiracies are the norm, not the exception." --G. Edward Griffin The Creature from Jekyll Island High Priestess of the Church of the Whale Penis |
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#11 | |
He who reads, sometimes writes.
Join Date: Sep 2001
Location: at the keyboard
Posts: 791
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Quote:
Perth - I have that Shoe cartoon up on my wall. Good one! |
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#12 | |
Strong Silent Type
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: Fort Collins, CO
Posts: 1,949
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Quote:
~james |
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#13 | |
going nowhere slow
Join Date: Nov 2002
Location: L.A.
Posts: 252
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Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: How many lesbians does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Quote:
Just kidding:], seriously though they were a really fucked up couple who never did things the way others would expect. My error was purely intentional and also a very direct result of never having smoked that stuff myself. Regards, J03L10T : )
__________________
"There never seems to be enough time to do things you wanna' do once you find them."-excerpt from Jim Croce's 'Time in a Bottle'. |
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#14 |
going nowhere slow
Join Date: Nov 2002
Location: L.A.
Posts: 252
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I'm sorry Wolf-
I forgot about that one, must have taken your reply to my usual nonsense as a verbal attack of sorts upon my joke. I am a writer and not a very good one most of the time, ordinary is exactly what most people tend to want to allow others to try and sell. It was just another joke. Sorry again.
__________________
"There never seems to be enough time to do things you wanna' do once you find them."-excerpt from Jim Croce's 'Time in a Bottle'. |
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#15 |
lobber of scimitars
Join Date: Jul 2001
Location: Phila Burbs
Posts: 20,774
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j03, dude ...
No offense taken, and my delivery is often misunderstood as criticism when it is not. It's all in good fun, Bro. Apologies to you too ...
__________________
![]() ![]() "Conspiracies are the norm, not the exception." --G. Edward Griffin The Creature from Jekyll Island High Priestess of the Church of the Whale Penis |
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