What is pissing you off this time?

[sexobon]

Originally Posted by footfootfoot

You left out, Rub Some Dirt On It, Nancy. What kind of quack are you?

At least I remembered that telling him to bite on a bullet was contraindicated in this instance.

[Snakeadelic]

Originally Posted by sexobon

At least I remembered that telling him to bite on a bullet was contraindicated in this instance.

Thanks to my neighbor's addiction to old Western movies and my addiction to the current Marvel Cinematic Universe, I can say with much snickering "I understood that reference!"

I'd heard it all my life. Surprised the hell outta me (as I did not watch westerns growing up or later in life, they just don't do it for me) when I found out that bullet casings used to be used as dental crowns!

[Gravdigr]

Brand new microwave.

1100 watts.

Big warning inside the door "ooooooowweeeee this here is a 1100 watt motherfucking monster. be careful! this cooks like nothing you have ever seen. you'll burn food. you'll get tumors. birth defects out the wazoo. beware this awesome motherfucker."

Now this morning I woke up, refreshed from a good night's sleep, and thought to myself "Self (that's what I call myself), wouldn't a nice, juicy, thick ground venison steak and some homemade baked beans be just delish this fine day?"

And then the microwave said FUCK YOU!

A simple operation; put the frozen meat in the microwave, press defrost, press 1, then 5, for "pounds of food". Wait, whut? Just "food"? 1.5 pounds of frozen ground venison took 3 minutes and change on the Old & Busted.

On the new, technological marvel microwave?

15+ minutes!!!!

Ok, Self, you read the buttons wrong. You misunderstood. Read the fucking manual.

The manual tells me to do exactly what I did. It also directs me to "stop the process every few minutes, and remove the defrosted portion."

I already hate this motherfucking turd. It's not been in the house for 48 hours. And I hate this fucking thing.

And there has not been a single button pressed successfully on the first try by anyone in the house.

To open the door, ya press a big damn button by the door. The spring behind the button has more pressure than the microwave weighs, so the microwave moves every goddamn time you try to open the door. Two hands to open the door.

Aren't things supposed to get easier/better/more with each generation of technology?

Man. There ain't nothing like failure first goddamn thing in ya day to set the mood.

Fuck you, too, Panasonic. Your microwave is a piece of shit. You better stretch that $150 bucks long and far. Because you ain't EVER gonna see any more of my money.