love em or hate em?

[lumberjim]

This occured to me as I read that other thread over there ---->

And Shelb and I had just been talking about the flip side on our way to our little Valley Forge photo shoot/starbucks run. I always assume that people like me. She said she's more likely to think they don't like her. Is this an optimism/pessimism thing?

[Whit]

      Dude, I had to go with with "wishy washy." Mostly because the closest emotion (or lack there of) I feel would be described as complete indifference. Until I have a reason to have an opinion on someone, either way, I simply don't.

[Riddil]

I know it's going to sound silly.. but I'm a big believer in personal energy. It's a little like auras or chakras, but without all the ancient asian mumbo-jumbo to get in the way.

I think that different people have a different "intonation" to the natural vibe they give off. When you meet someone in tune with you, then you get a good feeling from them. And vice versa. Some people have a more compatible "tone", so more people start out liking them. And again, vice versa.

It's all in the mojo, baby!!

[FileNotFound]

I almost always start out thinking that I'll like somebody and get along with them...from there it's a slow but steady realization that I hate the bastard and nothing would please me as much as to rend the flesh from his bones with my bare hands...

[Undertoad]

This topic is fascinating to me.

I am pretty introverted, and when meeting new people, all I can think about is how much they must not like me. I can't think about whether or not I like them. In order to get past this, I have to work hard to be optimistic about the situation.

If Jinx is the same way it probably helped the two of you to link up, if you gave off a signal to her that you liked her it would have put her at ease. And then she would have liked you.

[lumberjim]

yeah, that and my smokin' hot bod'.

[wolf]

I start out with a positive view, and adjust for reality.

Some adjustments come faster than others.

My entire job is pretty much about meeting and sizing up new people as quickly as possible ... so what may take most people a half hour or so, I might get in a matter of minutes.

[perth]

I would say wishy washy as well, but I've also noticed something strange. Whenever I'm with my 2-year-old son and we meet someone new (even, say, the cashier at the grocery store), He and I both feel the same way about them. If we don't like them, while I quietly think to myself "I don't really like them" he will hide behind me, get real quiet, and cry if they come to close. If we like them, I will quietly think that while he talks and laughs, etc.

I'm not really one to believe in auras or whatever, but I have never seen him differ with me. It could be argued that he picks something up from me (body language), and takes that queue. But in several instances I have met people after he has, and I have instantly disliked them as well. That may be because I know he doesn't like them, and the protective father in me comes out and I react in kind.

Not very scientific, I know. I think I'm going to start observing this a bit more closely, and try to be objective about it.

Just thought of one exception. His doctor. I like her a lot, but he hates her. I imagine there's other factors here though. Like, you know, needles and stuff.

[lumberjim]

kids, like dogs, can sense evil............

[Vilia Sonoben]

I'm in the wishy washy genre, also. I tend to judge based on the way they look at people around them - if they're scared and shivering and act as if we all just tried to run over them, then I just assume that their definitely unconfident.

But then again, if they walk in as if they own the place, and disrupt order throughout, then I might not be so keen to like them.

So I'm sort of in the middle. If they aren't dying of paranoia when they walk in where ever it is they're walking to, and they don't try to rule us, then I'm more prone to approach them.

...does this make any sort of sense?

[hot_pastrami]

Originally posted by lumberjim
kids, like dogs, can sense evil............

No no no.... HORSES can sense evil. Dogs can sense FEAR. Rabid ones, anyway. Dogs can also sense food. Don't you even watch movies?

I usually like people when I first meet them, until/unless they give me reason to do otherwise. I'm a get-along-with-almost-everybody kind of guy. But I'm not really an optimist, so I don't think that's the cause. I'm not a pessimist either, more of a hope-for-the-best-plan-for-the-worst realist. I just find it more socially comfortable to be friendly with people from the get-go, and that's usually reciprocated.

Of course I do tend to instantly dislike anyone who wants to sell me something which I didn't specifically approach them about. Pushy salespeople will peg my loathe-o-meter at full pretty rapidly.

[slang]

Originally posted by Undertoad
........ all I can think about is how much they must not like me.

I know this is off topic but you've said something like this before and it makes no sense to me.

Both in real life and on the cellar, you seem pretty reserved and are normally quite polite and respectful......even to those of us that are not.

People may not instantly click with you but I cant say that any reasonable humanoid would really *dislike* you when they first meet you.

If you were loud and obnoxious or.....I dont know....wore a hat that read "go fuck yourself"* or something offputting one would expect to have people in general not like you. Or at least not be too interested in getting to know you.

The whole notion seems strange to me.

*- I do not have a hat that reads "go fuck yourself". This was just a silly example.

[slang]

Originally posted by FileNotFound
.......I hate the bastard and nothing would please me as much as to rend the flesh from his bones with my bare hands...

Now that I can relate to.

[Elspode]

I used to expect to like people. It was sort of an up-front trust extension thing for me. Now, after several recent events and experiences, I'm not so sure I want to be so open and trusting anymore. I've had it shoved back in my face or betrayed too many times over the past year or so, and it leaves me feeling stupid, like I'm not insightful enough to take care of myself.

Some people are just *assholes*, you know? Oozing, suffering *assholes*. I hate that.

[Undertoad]

What you see with me is a careful treading about the social setting so that I don't step on any land mines. It's forced.

If I have a role, or have to be on stage, I kick ass. I've emceed several events where I spoke in front of hundreds of people, with just a few notes, and totally blew them away. But when I sat down at the table to eat dinner afterwards... nothing, I was spent and couldn't manage simple conversation.

I'm much better than I used to be though, and these days I can generally get on with anyone slightly less introverted than myself.

In previous jobs I was put into positions where I had to instantly get on with many others and take control of situations and stuff, and I folded like a house of cards, it was so painful.