Losing my religion.

[perth]

Nah, I think I've been drifting this direction for quite some time. Its not like this a sudden shift. I spent a great deal of time questioning why I believed in God, and in the end, the answers weren't good enough.

What it boiled down to was this:

I believed in God because I had always believed in him.

Not the rock-solid foundation one might hope for. So I asked myself why I had always believed in him. That answer made just about as much sense.

Because I wanted to believe. It gave an order to things I couldn't otherwise explain.

Let that one sink in. I believed in comething I couldn't explain to explain things I couldn't explain. So theres my foundation. And lets not assume that I took those answers, accepted them, and bolted out to announce my newly-acquired atheism. You don't rush to conclusions when your soul is on the line.

Conclusion: I don't believe in God. Am I right? Fuck, I don't know. Neither does anyone else, despite their protestations. But at least I am happy with my choice. And make no mistake, I am happy with it. There is a certain amount of freedom of thought that until now I have denied myself. I kind of like the freedom.

I suppose faith in God can be freeing as well, depending on your attitude and situation. But now that I see it from this side, I find religion to generally be limiting, constrictive and somewhat opppressive. But thats just my experience.