What's in a name?

[jinx]

Any Kabalarians here?

Every alphabet has a consistent mathematical order, which allows it to be measured. An analysis of the letters in your name will determine the qualities of your personality.

Your name determines your every experience. It defines your personal stengths [sic] and weaknesses both mentally and physically. It interprets your whole nature. It shows your position in life and your measure of success or failure. When you are named your destiny is created.

They have a web site with a free name analysis thinger (and a jailed leader with a history of sexual assualt) which is pretty fun, in a horoscope kinda way.

Although the name Shelby causes an active mind and a restless urge to explore new ideas, we emphasize that it causes a materialistic approach that frustrates higher humanitarian qualities. This name, when combined with the last name, can frustrate happiness, contentment, and success, as well as cause health weaknesses in the solar plexus and reproductive organs.

The name of Shelby brings opportunities for success in business and financial accumulation. It fires you with ambition and promotional ideas, ideas that are original, progressive, and large-scale. With this name, success to you is a foregone conclusion, for you cannot conceive any reason for not reaching all your goals, as you have self-sufficiency, supreme confidence, boundless energy, and enthusiasm. As long as you have a sense of freedom from monotony and drudgery, and can see progress being made, you feel buoyant and optimistic.