If you can't say anything nice...

[elSicomoro]

Since high school, I've had 7 "serious" girlfriends. Here and there, I'll think of the ex's, and laugh, cringe, or feel stupid.

I don't bag on them too much...I said TOO MUCH. But I was just thinking...if I had to, could I say something nice about each of them? It took a moment, but sure enough, I did. So this is what I came up with (one gf per line):

--She had big boobs and reached orgasm easily.
--She had big boobs and a great personality.
--She had big boobs and a great body.
--She had big boobs.
--She had big boobs and had great taste in music.
--She had a wonderful nature about her...and had big boobs.

Notice that they all have something in common.

Would you be able to do the same with your ex's?

[SteveDallas]

I'm pondering your list, in an effort to determine what all of these women have in common. I'm not sure what--I know there must be something, but it's escaping me for the moment. I'm sure it's something obviosu, right there in plain view in front of me.

Hmmm I only have one ex worthy of the name (a somewhat longer list of "shouldas" though). So here's my entry:

--She was a nice person. When she wasn't being psychotically posessive.


Also, I have to say your topic & post put me in mind of Dorothy Parker... When I read the topic I immediately thought of her famous quote, "If you can't say something nice about somebody, come sit next to me." But then reading the post put me in mind of, "If all the girls who went to the Yale prom were laid end to end, I wouldn't be surprised."

[xoxoxoBruce]

And the 7th????

[Whit]

Would you be able to do the same with your ex's?

      Okay, I'm game. I've only had two really serious relationships though. So, here goes;
-- She was really cute, and she really tested the strength of my resolve to follow my moral code.
-- She was gorgeous, and she's allowed me act as a father to her son that isn't mine, as well as not getting in the way of my relationship with my daughter. Not interfering with those relationships is all I want out of her so we have no problems.
     On a related topic, one of the second's son's classmate's recently asked if she was his mom or his grandma. Less than a week later a cashier ask if he was my brother. I love telling that story, it's more fun when she's there though. I'll have to e-mail her a link to this thread.

[elSicomoro]

Originally posted by xoxoxoBruce
And the 7th????

She's the greatest person I've ever met...we've been together 4 years.

(And she has big boobs.)

[xoxoxoBruce]

She's the greatest person I've ever met...we've been together 4 years.

There is a god!

[elSicomoro]

Okay Bruce...enlighten me.

[xoxoxoBruce]

Nothing mysterious. 1.After six attempts, not failed, but rather mismatched, you found a match that still fulfills what seems to be your common qualifier. That's not a common story these days. You've been lucky or persistant enough to find sucess without lowered expectations. 2. I'm easily amused.

[Whit]

     So, Syc, I take pride in being the only one to rise to your challenge of saying something nice about our ex's. I guess we really are surrounded by some mean-spirited bastards...

[elSicomoro]

I have plenty of ignorant shit to say about my ex's, which usually involves their mental states or their backwards-ass parents.

But I'm at the point now where I can look back and not care. Oh sure, some of the emotions are still there, but as I get older, all that shit keeps melting further away. Plus, I've always been one to look at the bright side of things--I obviously dated these women for a reason, loved a couple of them, and was engaged to a couple of them (previous to Rho). So, I figure that there has to be something good in each of them. And that's the best way to remember them, while keeping in the back of your mind that there were good reasons for ending those relationships.

1) She wasn't the brightest crayon in the box, but she was a sweet person. I've met nicer, but not many.

2) Amazing in every way. Now digs girls more than guys. The first person I truly loved, and I still do. We're great friends, though we don't talk much, due to distance. She was the giver of the best hugs I ever received.

3) It's kind of hard here... she was a faker, she wasn't particularly mature... she's booksmart, but not smart-smart. She isn't particularly nice, though she fakes it decently well. And she was fucking insane. She had big boobs, though, and a pretty nice ass.

After this, I kind of stopped the whole relationship thing for a while (~2.5 years). I then fell for someone else (or thought I did), and that produced a very strange relationship for a while. Then I got her out of the picture and my eyes opened to...

4) She's smart, she's beautiful, and nothing makes her happier than making someone else happy. I'm stupidly lucky to be with her.

Originally posted by sycamore
I have plenty of ignorant shit to say about my ex's

Oh my god, PLEASE stop using this word when you mean "immature" or "stupid" or whatever. IT DOESN'T MEAN THAT! ASLJDFOJAIWERJQJWDFJALKSDJFQJW!@!!!#!@$%!@#$%

(Incidentally, the misuse of the word "ignorant" is probably my biggest pet peeve. It's spectacular when someone says "That's mighty ignorant of you", because you have a great retort, but the rest of the time, it drives me nucking futs.)

[Whit]

     Heh, it's kind of a personal rule of mine not to say bad things about my ex's. Of course, with my first love I can tell stories about her slanted in her favor and people still get wide eyed and ask why I was with her. Come to think of it, after 9 years my friends that knew me back then are only now not giving me shit about her all the time. She did, indeed, make life interesting.
     I wonder if she's still alive... The last place she lived in got burned down. I found this out within hours of telling my more recent ex that I couldn't imagine the first leaving a place standing for three years...

[elSicomoro]

Okay, okay, Dave, you got me on that one.