Dropping the F bomb-- what age is acceptable?

footfootfoot · 10-03-2006, 10:52 PM

As part of his vast repertory of vocalizations, inch^3 has begun dropping the F bomb lately. (he heard it from mom) (ok, maybe from me too)

Anyway, he has been playing around with words and making up his own cockney rhyming slang (eg glow for a chalk= go for a walk), transposing first letters of word pairs for fun (eg bool skuss for school bus, or "Let's play Boggle." "You mean gobble? no boggle. goggle? bobble?" etc.) and this type of thing: (eg are you a beetle bug? No, I'm a cheetle chug, a deedle dug etc.)

Lately it's been fuck fuck fuck fucky fucky fucky etc.

He's singing it to himself and not checking us for reaction. We've been ignoring it completely as we might if he was just saying la la la, which it sounds like he is, it is a rather sing song fuck fuck fucky fuck.

So he'll be three at the end of November. I really don't want to empower this word with any kind of talk at this stage. He's excercising his options like mad lately, to the point of saying NO and refusing something he really wants or having accidents in his pants becasue he is waiting too long or not want ing to "go" because we asked if he needed to. (him doing the dance)

Any thoughts on this one? When he's older we'll let him listen to George Carlin, though GC did narrate an episode of Thomas the Tank Engine that Inch heard...

lumberjim · 10-03-2006, 10:57 PM

eh, fuck it. 'sprolly just a fuckin phase

footfootfoot · 10-03-2006, 11:10 PM

prolly right. Next time I'll say to the librarian
"He picked up that fucking shit watching Thomas the fuckingTank Engine"

wolf · 10-03-2006, 11:17 PM

Despite dropping the f-bomb myself with all the precision of a Norden Bomb Sight, I believe that no age is acceptable.

Aliantha · 10-03-2006, 11:17 PM

Thomas the fucking tank engine to you!

footfootfoot · 10-03-2006, 11:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by wolf

Despite dropping the f-bomb myself with all the precision of a Norden Bomb Sight, I believe that no age is acceptable.

So what's a parent to do?

wolf · 10-03-2006, 11:38 PM

Since the inchling isn't conceptually up to groking good words vs. bad words, extinguishing the behavior is the best bet. Ignore the uses, reward substitution.

Skip over the bit about the Skinner Box. You don't need one yet.

BigV · 10-03-2006, 11:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by footfootfoot

So what's a parent to do?

I'll answer your first question with another question...my thoughts...

f*ck isn't a kid word. That's how I explained it to SonofV. There are lots of concepts that are "kid" and lots that are "adult" and some that are both. But this word, in our house/family/rules, is not a kid word. Therefore, the kid can't use it. That's how I explained it to him. It connected a known quantity to this new behavior and helped him categorize it. That was a way for me to communicate to him what I wanted without empowering the word.

Much later, a richer discussion of why it's wrong (intent vs the mere pronounciation of the word, and homonyms, etc) was possible and appropriate.

Hmmm. Guess I answered both questions. Good luck!

DucksNuts · 10-04-2006, 12:59 AM

What works with my nephews is substituting the undesired word with a much cuter kid friendly option....it doesnt arose the i'm-doing-something-naughty? radar and seems to work effectively.

Eg, I drop the F bomb all the time, but when i say it and it gets repeated (or is said at any stage) I exchanged it with "flying frogs".

Now when I am driving and I drop the F.B, the boys automatically go "Flying Frogs!!!".

Sundae · 10-04-2006, 05:32 AM

I'd carry on ignoring it at this stage - as you say he's not checking for a reaction, it's not being used in context, just as a pleasing sound.

My brother went through a "bugger" phase. My sister and I had to leave the room because we understood it was a bad word and our expressions would give the game away.

Ibby · 10-04-2006, 07:05 AM

Bug'rit, millenium hand and shrimp...

Griff · 10-04-2006, 07:25 AM

Replacing the word is necessary. You could use bugger, since it doesn't have such an impact in the USA... flying frogs might be better though. Little kids dropping F-bombs can turn into not so little kids dropping F-bombs. It looks like Dads gonna have to clean up his language as well...

Trilby · 10-04-2006, 07:51 AM

When you're accidentally saying the F word around kiddies just draw it out, like this: "Fuckrying out loud!"

Spexxvet · 10-04-2006, 08:06 AM

If you don't want your kids to say/do something, don't do it yourself. So stop saying fuck in front of him. Stop shooting heroin and getting head in front of him, too.:p

When he's singing "fuck, fuck, fucky" sing along with him, but sing "buck, buck, bucky", then "duck, duck, ducky", etc. Just avoid "suck, suck, sucky".

mrnoodle · 10-04-2006, 09:31 AM

This is the age he should be learning how to speak properly. Speaking improperly comes naturally and requires no training. You're the parent, you're supposed to be a fuddy duddy. I'd personally tell him to stfu with the fucking curse words and speak like a gentleman. He can do what he wants outside the house.

10-03-2006, 10:52 PM	#1
footfootfoot To shreds, you say? Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: in the house and on the street-how many, many feet we meet! Posts: 18,449	Dropping the F bomb-- what age is acceptable? As part of his vast repertory of vocalizations, inch^3 has begun dropping the F bomb lately. (he heard it from mom) (ok, maybe from me too) Anyway, he has been playing around with words and making up his own cockney rhyming slang (eg glow for a chalk= go for a walk), transposing first letters of word pairs for fun (eg bool skuss for school bus, or "Let's play Boggle." "You mean gobble? no boggle. goggle? bobble?" etc.) and this type of thing: (eg are you a beetle bug? No, I'm a cheetle chug, a deedle dug etc.) Lately it's been fuck fuck fuck fucky fucky fucky etc. He's singing it to himself and not checking us for reaction. We've been ignoring it completely as we might if he was just saying la la la, which it sounds like he is, it is a rather sing song fuck fuck fucky fuck. So he'll be three at the end of November. I really don't want to empower this word with any kind of talk at this stage. He's excercising his options like mad lately, to the point of saying NO and refusing something he really wants or having accidents in his pants becasue he is waiting too long or not want ing to "go" because we asked if he needed to. (him doing the dance) Any thoughts on this one? When he's older we'll let him listen to George Carlin, though GC did narrate an episode of Thomas the Tank Engine that Inch heard... __________________ The internet is a hateful stew of vomit you can never take completely seriously. - Her Fobs

10-03-2006, 10:57 PM	#2
lumberjim I can hear my ears Join Date: Oct 2003 Posts: 25,571	eh, fuck it. 'sprolly just a fuckin phase __________________ This body holding me reminds me of my own mortality Embrace this moment, remember We are eternal, all this pain is an illusion ~MJKeenan

10-03-2006, 11:10 PM	#3
footfootfoot To shreds, you say? Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: in the house and on the street-how many, many feet we meet! Posts: 18,449	prolly right. Next time I'll say to the librarian "He picked up that fucking shit watching Thomas the fuckingTank Engine" __________________ The internet is a hateful stew of vomit you can never take completely seriously. - Her Fobs Last edited by footfootfoot; 10-03-2006 at 11:34 PM. Reason: Aliantha's right. Again.

10-03-2006, 11:17 PM	#4
wolf lobber of scimitars Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Phila Burbs Posts: 20,774	Despite dropping the f-bomb myself with all the precision of a Norden Bomb Sight, I believe that no age is acceptable. __________________ wolf eht htiw og "Conspiracies are the norm, not the exception." --G. Edward Griffin The Creature from Jekyll Island High Priestess of the Church of the Whale Penis

10-03-2006, 11:17 PM	#5
Aliantha trying hard to be a better person Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Brisbane, Australia Posts: 16,493	Thomas the fucking tank engine to you! __________________ Kind words are the music of the world. F. W. Faber

10-03-2006, 11:38 PM	#7
wolf lobber of scimitars Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Phila Burbs Posts: 20,774	Since the inchling isn't conceptually up to groking good words vs. bad words, extinguishing the behavior is the best bet. Ignore the uses, reward substitution. Skip over the bit about the Skinner Box. You don't need one yet. __________________ wolf eht htiw og "Conspiracies are the norm, not the exception." --G. Edward Griffin The Creature from Jekyll Island High Priestess of the Church of the Whale Penis

10-04-2006, 12:59 AM	#9
DucksNuts Bitchy Little Brat Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: Queensland, Australia Posts: 5,067	What works with my nephews is substituting the undesired word with a much cuter kid friendly option....it doesnt arose the i'm-doing-something-naughty? radar and seems to work effectively. Eg, I drop the F bomb all the time, but when i say it and it gets repeated (or is said at any stage) I exchanged it with "flying frogs". Now when I am driving and I drop the F.B, the boys automatically go "Flying Frogs!!!".

10-04-2006, 05:32 AM	#10
Sundae polaroid of perfection Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: West Yorkshire Posts: 24,185	I'd carry on ignoring it at this stage - as you say he's not checking for a reaction, it's not being used in context, just as a pleasing sound. My brother went through a "bugger" phase. My sister and I had to leave the room because we understood it was a bad word and our expressions would give the game away. __________________ Life's hard you know, so strike a pose on a Cadillac

10-04-2006, 07:05 AM	#11
Ibby erika Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: "the high up north" Posts: 6,127	Bug'rit, millenium hand and shrimp... __________________ not really back, you didn't see me, i was never here shhhhhh

10-04-2006, 07:25 AM	#12
Griff still says videotape Join Date: Feb 2001 Posts: 26,813	Replacing the word is necessary. You could use bugger, since it doesn't have such an impact in the USA... flying frogs might be better though. Little kids dropping F-bombs can turn into not so little kids dropping F-bombs. It looks like Dads gonna have to clean up his language as well... __________________ If you would only recognize that life is hard, things would be so much easier for you. - Louis D. Brandeis

10-04-2006, 07:51 AM	#13
Trilby Slattern of the Swail Join Date: Jul 2004 Posts: 15,654	When you're accidentally saying the F word around kiddies just draw it out, like this: "Fuckrying out loud!" __________________ In Barrie's play and novel, the roles of fairies are brief: they are allies to the Lost Boys, the source of fairy dust and ...They are portrayed as dangerous, whimsical and extremely clever but quite hedonistic. "Shall I give you a kiss?" Peter asked and, jerking an acorn button off his coat, solemnly presented it to her. —James Barrie Wimminfolk they be tricksy. - ZenGum

10-04-2006, 08:06 AM	#14
Spexxvet Makes some feel uncomfortable Join Date: Dec 2005 Posts: 10,346	If you don't want your kids to say/do something, don't do it yourself. So stop saying fuck in front of him. Stop shooting heroin and getting head in front of him, too.:p When he's singing "fuck, fuck, fucky" sing along with him, but sing "buck, buck, bucky", then "duck, duck, ducky", etc. Just avoid "suck, suck, sucky". __________________ "I'm certainly free, nay compelled, to spread the gospel of Spex. " - xoxoxoBruce

10-04-2006, 09:31 AM	#15
mrnoodle bent Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: under the weather Posts: 2,656	This is the age he should be learning how to speak properly. Speaking improperly comes naturally and requires no training. You're the parent, you're supposed to be a fuddy duddy. I'd personally tell him to stfu with the fucking curse words and speak like a gentleman. He can do what he wants outside the house. __________________ Sìn a nall na cuaranan sin. -- Cha mhór is fheairrde thu iad, tha iad coltach ri cat air a dhathadh

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