WHAT THE FUCKING FUCK? (longish rant)

[footfootfoot]

So just a few minutes ago, right before she leaves, she starts off with her usual "I know you're probably going to be angry..." intro, which is partly true, because that kind of intro ALREADY makes me angry (annoyed really) and she tells me (I'm leaving out a lot of her BS equivocating) that she hid my guns because since I hadn't been talking to her lately (Hell fucking o? Remember the 97 times I said we wouldn't talk until there was a third person present?) and TWO YEARS AGO I told her that I was feeling suicidal (I didn't, wasn't, and am not) that she hid them out of concern for my safety.

This is yet another reminder to me, and I thank FSM for it, how way seriously-ass crazy she is.

a) Not the way to handle it
b) Typical melodrama bullshit that runs in her family
c) Typical bid for control of the situation
d) Typical lack of respect for boundaries
e) Typical bending of facts and or creating them from whole cloth
f) Keep your fucking hands off my guns
g) Need a combo locking cabinet
h) Fucking asshole drama queen
i) How soon will you be able to GTFO of my house?
j) Learn about the different diagnoses of depression and ask what mine is.
k) Suicidal ideation? Never had it, never will. (except when I contemplate the rest of my life spent with you.)
l) Go fuck yourself
m) Fuck you
n) Mind your own business
o) Get a clue
p) I hate you and that rabbit who shits and pisses all over the house
q) Ha Ha. You're such an idiot, my .22 is in the basement on my workbench.

After some questioning about if they were hidden in a spot where they will not be subjected to damage, she tells me she took them to someone else's house, 'who knows about guns,' (whatever the fuck that means) and will bring them back on Wednesday now that she knows I'm not going to kill myself. (Or realized her stupid ploy wouldn't get me to talk. Idiot)

I'm SO pissed at myself right now for having spent so many fucking years with her and not seeing just how crackers she is.

I'm the real idiot in this picture. She's just crazy.

Also, it's not about the guns, per se; they are nothing special and can easily be replaced. I'd feel the same way if she'd taken my gardening tools, or cameras or whatever. She's always been jealous of my going hunting and or target shooting because that is a form of independence of mine. It sexes up all her abandonment issues. That's part of what this is, also I was raised to treat other people's property as THOUGH IT BELONGED TO THEM. Whoa, there's a concept.

She told me she mentioned it to 'some people' (I'm guessing her brother and or 12 step folks) and they all said "OH RED FLAG!"

No, I haven't been withdrawn and morose then suddenly cheerful, giving away all of my shit, and all the crap that other people do when they are planning on checking out, I haven't been down in the dumps. And if I were going to off myself, I sure as hell wouldn't shoot myself. That's so fucked up. There really isn't a nice way kill yourself. She's the self injurious one in the house.

Fucking tool.