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Buy your tickets early, the circus is coming to town
Now that Jeb Bush has moved his first piece off pawn’s row,
and Mitt Romney has cleverly countered as Bishop,
I thought of starting a new thread for the 2016 GOP Presidential nomination,
but then realized we already have that T-shirt.
So starting here…
The current prominent candidates:
Mitt Romney is deja vu all over again
Paul Ryan has decided to re-read the entire works of Ayn Rand
Ron Paul is body-snatching under the name of Rand Paul
Herman Cain is replaced by Dr. Ben Carson as the GOP’s token Black
Rick Perry still can’t name that 3rd Agency, maybe due to lead paint on his camp’s sign
and Rick Santorum who still believes ObamaCare is akin to apartheid
Other returning notables:
Donald Trump promises urban redevelopment on the National Mall in Washington DC,
with a multi-storied hotel and retail center to be named “Trump Mall USA”
Jack Felllure thinks it’s still 1919 and time for prohibition
Mike Huckabee managed to break his contract with Fox News
Sarah Palin promises to continue being Sarah Palin
Other notables( and not so much) from 2012:
John Huntsman has departed the building, but graciously left us with one
of his beautiful daughters, Abby, as tv hostess we can watch daily
Jimmy McMillan was the GOP’s most colorful, but he also jumped the shark
to run for NY City Mayor, endorsed Obama , and his rent is still too high
Thaddeus McCotter is still named Thaddeus McCotter
I’ve lost track of Newt Gingrich, Michele Bachmann, the Ron Jeremy look-alike,
Jonathan Sharkey, and the Arizona Sheriff, Joe Arpaio, along with other GOP wannabes
who weren’t worth uncaging the ferret.
New presidential candidates for 2016 include:
Marco Rubio, but his sun has suddenly been totally eclipsed by his Governor
Jeb Bush will try to do better than his brother, who failed to do better than his father
Ted Cruz promises to shut down the Executive branch and will take over as President of the Senate
George Pataki promises a nationwide tax-free area for businesses
… zero taxes … no sales-, use-, transfer- or business- taxes, and no personal income taxes for employees
Carly Florin promises to eliminate the US debt with her golden parachute from HP
John Bolton wants to run, but can’t get out of his contract with Fox News
Scott Walker promises to demolish the European Union, the Union Pacific,
and all 18 “Union County” governments will be renamed as “Abstinenceonly”.
Bobby Jindal is the only GOP Governor told “…he was doing a good job…” by Barack Obama
Lindsey Graham promises to bomb everyone who…
And lastly there is Chris Christy who has told everyone to sit down and shut up.
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