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Shoplifting is one thing, but in a way, stealing from a friend is far more serious. I've heard teenagers laugh and call shoplifting "shopping without money." I think Kagen is right in that many teenagers may shoplift just for the excitement of it, or because friends egg them on. But stealing from a friend is a real violation of trust. Its not the same as swiping nail polish off the shelf at Walmart.
Your step daughter may have any number of motives behind stealing from you or a friend, but her actions reveal a true indifference for the results her behavior has on others and are extremely selfish. She is showing evidence of a sense of entitlement that has no basis in reality. Just because I want what a friend has, that doesn't mean that I get to help myself to it and skate off without a backward glance.
If she is caught shoplifting from a store, they'll just slap her hands the first time. If she continues, however, she will face serious consequences up to and including jail - or in her case, time in juvie detention.
I would try to get her into counseling if I were you, and I'd also let her know that you will NOT bail her out from any consequences if she continues in this behavior. She has most likely already lost a friend over it - or at the very least, caused the friendship to become strained. Even if she doesn't get caught by the security cams at Walmart, if she continues her actions, she will quickly find herself with a reputation as someone that nobody will trust - very hard on a teenager.
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