So, I talked with the CEO today. He only gets 'It's a mess!' from his VP of HR and has no details. I made him laugh with a few stories, such as how for the first 2 months I thought the clinic operated 8-4, because everyone was out the door at 3:55. Turns out we're 8-4:30.
Otherwise it's a bit like joe's story (thanks, joe) ... I had a mandate, needed to rein in the outrageous aspects of ripofferry, and my staff want to kill me. If they were willing to pay something I'd take you up on your offer, sexobon.
As far as EEOC goes, anyone can launch an EEOC complaint. The hospital is running terrified of what they KNOW is an unjustified threat, but the $$$ it will cost them to defend it isn't worth it to them. I honestly have a far more serious basis for an EEOC complaint, not based on asshole twentysomethings wishing me dead, but on other stuff. But no, I'm not going that route.
I liked your suggestion, UT, except that they'd all be so downcast at me walking in alive that I'd have to console them.
Things have looked up somewhat, however. The ringleader receptionist got a call this morning informing her that she will report to Medical Records (windowless, basement) Monday morning. That's where her job is, henceforth. The nurse manager was LIVID and doing everything she could to stave off the move, but no dice by lunchtime when I left for meetings. If wishes could kill I would be dead by now.
Meanwhile, my boss called the woman who can salvage this situation and offered her a job. She's smarter than me, works hardest, takes no bs from anybody, and my nurse manager hates her. I love her. If she comes back to the practice we can do this thing. So, celebrating tonight!