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I think that depends on whether or not the dead soldier has been identified. So, using their names on t-shirts surely cannot be right unless permission has been given. Flag draped coffins though have a potential anonymity. If what's being shown is a coffin with a flag over it and there's no way anybody could tell whose coffin it is, then it becomes a purely representative picture.
What I really dislike is people using consumers' fears as a means of persuading them to part with their cash.
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