[Elspode]

Couples have rules. They may appear to be liberal and freewheeling to outsiders, yet still have boundaries. Lab is owning her end of things and doing what is right...protecting her marriage.

The Cellar is not a smut site. We are friends and even family, of a sort. As such, our first concern must always be for mutual respect and positive outcomes of our interactions. I am as guilty as anyone of encouraging generous Cellar ladies to share their pulchritude, but in no case would I *ever* want my own desires to cause any sort of problem in anyone's real life, ever.

That said, I seriously doubt that SD or anyone else was encouraging Labrat to do something that would cause trouble in her marriage. Not knowingly.

The *one* thing that sets The Cellar apart from every other online community I've ever known is the essential respect and true caring between most of us. Anything that brings that into question or peril is wrong, and must be avoided.

So - don't hammer on Red. His wife, his relationship, their mutual rules. We are secondary to that, as should be.

I would like to think that Red and Labber will settle their issue, and that we will see them *both* again soon, because they are important to us.