That reminds me of a conversation between my buddy's late dad and this girl that ran with the dad. Dad was staying with my buddy at the time, and overheard this convo, shortened for brevity's sake:
Girlfriend, having said something like this for the second or third time in the conversation: I sure wish I had some bigger titties.
Buddy's dad, 75-ish, not in the best of health: I wish I had a ten inch dick that'd get hard, too, but, it don't look like it's gonna happen.