[Sundae]

There's one shift a week where I start at the same time as a young lad who is always running late. To the extent I arrive just after him, as I'm arriving early.

Being a young lad, he sprints from the very periphery of my vision. He covers about 300m (albeit downhill) in ridiculously short space of time; as soon as my brain registers him he's nearly across the bridge to the supermarket.

Seeing someone running so fast in an urban location, in the dark, is really quite unsettling. And I never remember which day our shifts coincide. There's a chance he's not often late, or I'm not always early, but I just remember the times I see him running as if for his life.

I would not survive a 28 Days Later style attack.

Shel, I'd suggest any number of amusing pranks to play on the Wacko.
But I think I prefer you alive and posting here...