the stuff I've gotten my head around is (some of) the practical stuff, and it isn't fun. And thinking "oh I'll ask..." .... fuck. But when I'm off guard it ... yeah
I had a brief dream respite for the last few months, but he's back.... Just mundane every day life anxiety dreams..... and for a while it was just me. and sometimes it still is. The only resolution is dawn either way.
I have never woken expecting to find him there, though. So there's that. That would be horrible(r), I think. But maybe that's because his side is full of clean laundry waiting to be put away and a multitude of pillows to try and help with my rapidly aging body randomly needing support in weird places in the night
