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Old 12-08-2008, 12:35 PM   #38
Shawnee123
Why, you're a regular Alfred E Einstein, ain't ya?
 
Join Date: Jun 2006
Posts: 21,206
Quote:
Old, old, old people who put the blinker on for ten minutes and then, regardless of whatever, just go for it.
Carlin used to say (about people who leave their blinkers on) they were going "around the world, to the left."

I'd forgotten how unnerving daily highway driving can be. Mostly it's not a problem but it's the following who cause all the problems:

The Jerker: at the very last second and for no apparent reason, person jerks steering wheel and changes lanes, usually cutting off the person already in that lane.

The Talker: I would like a gun if only to shoot at people whose own minds are so devoid of thought that they have to spend every single solitary second with their damn cell phone plastered to their ear.

The Dumb Bitch: Just one girl I saw last week, it's dark, she has no lights on except for the brilliant display from her phone as she texts while driving.

The Ass Sniffer: There's no one else on the road, you're in the middle lane neither passing nor merging to an exit. Bozo follows your ass like he's sniffing it, keeping an equal distance of about 2 feet, rather than passing or trailing back.

The Ass Rider: Thinks if he rides your ass you could possibly go any faster than the car directly in front of you while the highway is bumper to bumper all lanes.

The right-passer: Pass in the correct lane, fuckwad. Didja see there are cars merging onto the interstate in that lane?

Mr Bad Car: Usually about 18 years old driving a Civic with one of those wingy things on the back, presumably because he plans to drive so fast that the wingy thing is needed to keep his car on the road. There are really tacky flames painted on, which from far away look as though someone keyed his car with a really big key. His tires extend about a foot from the edge of his car. Still, he drives like a pussy.

Who am I forgetting?
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--Bill Cosby

Last edited by Shawnee123; 12-08-2008 at 01:00 PM.
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