[jinx]

Thanks guys, I really appreciate your help thru this.
My dad and I have never been close. He's always been very self-involved and has hurt me with his dishonesty and selfishness to the point that I created a comfortable distance from him for myself years ago. My sister has always been closer to him, she puts a lot more effort in and takes more crap, but he has included her in his ill will... which hurts just as bad as his feeling towards me.
He wants something from us. Something he is not entitled to and should not have asked for but did anyway. Since we didn't say yes immediately, but were taking time and thinking it all thru together, we're dead to him. I'm just so blown away - even knowing what a shit he is I wasn't prepared for this.
I did see him at the funeral and he was as normal as he ever is - his wife wouldn't make eye contact with my sister or I but I didn't really notice until it was pointed out to me later just because it was such an awful situation to begin with. I thought everyone was just struggling to get thru the event. It's even more upsetting to realize they were able to be petty despite their grief. And now I'm pissed off about it.
And zippy is right on.