The pillow might work, maybe something along the lines of "you can use mommy's pillow, but you have to use it in your big boy bed"?
Also, maybe you can have someone take him to the park for an hour.. just so you can have a hot bath, or a quick nap? Something to re-charge you?
Children are a frustrating thing... We love them, and will neglect ourselves to care for them... but sometimes you just have to have a *me* day! In some cases a *me* hour!! When we were dealing with our oldest son's behavioral issues, we ended up breaking everything down into hours, even blocks of time, say breakfast to lunch, was too long. His issues are much more severe, but we learned a lot that might work for "normal" kids.
