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I think Diz knew you as well as you knew him. Animals sometimes have a calm wisdom that we lack, and I know he wouldn't have wanted you to feel badly about how things worked out. Honestly, I don't think you'd be feeling any better about it if you had been there. That poisonous part of our brains that lies to us would have just looked for another way you were at fault. So ignore that instinct, and try to free yourself to mourn him without what ifs or should haves.
RIP Diz.
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