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kerosene · 03-15-2004, 02:11 PM

I usually steer clear of these kinds of discussions, because A. they turn nasty very quickly and B. in my experience, I don't find many of these generalizations to be true. At least not in my circumstances.

When there is a problem, we try and work together to come up with a solution. Not rehash it over and over just for the sake of it. I like being involved in perth's hobbies, even if I never participated in them before. I think it is part of appreciating another person, least of all my spouse. And he is involved in the things I enjoy, like painting. We include each other to narrow the gap between us. Part of why I liked him in the first place was that we had similar interests. If he was really into watching sports on TV, I might not have ever dated him, simply because it is something I have never been interested in. But then again, if I liked sports I might have found that an attractive quality in someone else.

I think it is great to be married to my best friend. Not because I want to whine at him and expect him to empathize, but because its more fun to spend my life with my best friend than some guy that has only a little bit of interest in hanging out with me outside the bedroom. We have fun hanging out together.

And yes, we do have our independence, too. I go out with friends and so does he. He does stuff by himself sometimes, and I do the same. But I never feel that his hobbies are all for him, or that he would be uncomfortable getting involved in mine.

I guess it is hard for me to understand the complaints men and women have about each other. I appreciate that perth is a man (it is actually an advantage), and whether his differences with me are due to his gender or not is irrellevant. I like the person/man/being that he is. His being male only adds to the whole thing.

03-15-2004, 02:11 PM	#56
kerosene Touring the facilities Join Date: Nov 2002 Location: The plains of Colorado Posts: 3,476	I usually steer clear of these kinds of discussions, because A. they turn nasty very quickly and B. in my experience, I don't find many of these generalizations to be true. At least not in my circumstances. When there is a problem, we try and work together to come up with a solution. Not rehash it over and over just for the sake of it. I like being involved in perth's hobbies, even if I never participated in them before. I think it is part of appreciating another person, least of all my spouse. And he is involved in the things I enjoy, like painting. We include each other to narrow the gap between us. Part of why I liked him in the first place was that we had similar interests. If he was really into watching sports on TV, I might not have ever dated him, simply because it is something I have never been interested in. But then again, if I liked sports I might have found that an attractive quality in someone else. I think it is great to be married to my best friend. Not because I want to whine at him and expect him to empathize, but because its more fun to spend my life with my best friend than some guy that has only a little bit of interest in hanging out with me outside the bedroom. We have fun hanging out together. And yes, we do have our independence, too. I go out with friends and so does he. He does stuff by himself sometimes, and I do the same. But I never feel that his hobbies are all for him, or that he would be uncomfortable getting involved in mine. I guess it is hard for me to understand the complaints men and women have about each other. I appreciate that perth is a man (it is actually an advantage), and whether his differences with me are due to his gender or not is irrellevant. I like the person/man/being that he is. His being male only adds to the whole thing.